


Eyes of Fire

by J_P_Lupine



Category: Vikings (TV)
Genre: Biting, Don't copy to another site, F/M, Femdom, Floki - Freeform, Hair-pulling, Lagertha - Freeform, Loki - Freeform, Multiple Sex Positions, NSFW, Odin - Freeform, Oral Sex, Pagan Gods, Ragnar Lothbrok - Freeform, References to Norse Religion & Lore, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2020-07-08 20:10:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 48,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19875385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/J_P_Lupine/pseuds/J_P_Lupine
Summary: It was colder than most days when the strange boat arrived. Its sails bore no allegiance to any people or land, nor did the stern's head tell of any specific place from which it came. It was a plain boat made from a light colored wood, the stern having the head of a small dragon, and the sails were like blank parchment.Those by the dock that noticed the ship became wary, watching as it steadily drew nearer to the shore. They could not see if anyone was aboard, and it seemed the ship was barren of life. It was as if the boat itself was merely a mirage as it went over the gentle waves and mist that clung to the water's surface.





	1. On Icy Waves

It was colder than most days when the strange boat arrived. Its sails bore no allegiance to any people or land, nor did the stern's head tell of any specific place from which it came. It was a plain boat made from a light colored wood, the stern having the head of a small dragon, and the sails were like blank parchment.

Those by the dock that noticed the ship became wary, watching as it steadily drew nearer to the shore. They could not see if anyone was aboard, and it seemed the ship was barren of life. It was as if the boat itself was merely a mirage as it went over the gentle waves and mist that clung to the water's surface.

Those that were brave enough neared the dock as the boat slid closer to shore. When it abruptly stopped after hitting the sand, there was an utter silence that fell and a tenseness filling the air as the people waited.

There were audible gasps when someone laying in the ship suddenly sat up, a hood covering their head that didn't allow for anyone to see who....or what, was underneath. The figure rose to their feet with ease before hopping over the side of the boat with a warrior's grace. Standing there before the people, the person beneath the cloak let out a low whistle before a wolf with fur like dark smoke leapt from the boat and landed in the wet sand.

It licked its maws before calmly stepping to the stranger's side, leaving prints as grits of sand fell from its paws. A voice that was crystal clear and undeniably from a woman or young boy spoke from beneath the hood.

"Is this the fjord known as Kattegat?" They questioned but no one replied despite them speaking their native tongue. The stranger seemed to glance over the faces of the people. "Is this Kattegat?" Their tone was harsher, like a biting, winter wind.

"This is indeed Kattegat. But who, might I ask, are you?" A regal woman stepped forward with her hands clasped in front of her. It was Aslaug, the queen of this land, and her eyes betrayed her friendly smile as they held a hint of fear of the unknown.

"I am who I am and I'm looking for my father." The stranger then reached up towards their hood and calmly pushed it off. The people crowded in the area gasped and murmured at how the woman before them looked. With skin kissed by death, hair as white as snow, and eyes like the red and blue of a flame, she raised her chin while her eyes scanned the faces visible to her. "Where is Floki?"

~

"And you are certain that this man is your father?" Aslaug questioned while calmly walking. I followed her with Garmr at my side while his eyes glanced around and the wolf had a calm body language as I stared at the back of the woman's head.

"It is an uncommon name that he possesses, so unless you have more than one Floki within Kattegat, it's him." I replied.

"If we had more than one Floki, Kattegat would be full of madness." The queen joked. "Funny though, he never mentioned having a child such as you."

"He doesn't even know I exist in all honesty. By the time my mother knew she was pregnant, he was already gone."

"....It is rather strange how these things happen." She said lowly while leading me through the woods. Floki was a boatsmith, living on the water's edge away from town with a vast expanse of trees separating him from the rest of Kattegat. "This is it." She stopped between two trees before glancing back to me. "He and his wife live here."

Walking past her, I said nothing and went towards the house with Garmr trotting after me. When I reached the door and had looked back Aslaug was already gone. Taking in a slow breath, I raised my fist and knocked on the door. How odd it was for me to finally meet my father after all of these years....

I had heard stories of him, but only a few as my own mother had hardly even known him. He was a man of the gods, she had said.

The door opened, revealing a blonde woman with dark eyes standing there. She paused, her eyes going wide at my appearance, but she said nothing. No sound came from her as she simply....stared.

"Helga, who is it?" I heard a man's voice call out, and the woman glanced over her shoulder briefly before looking back to me. She blinked as if making sure her eyes were not fooling her, but even when she opened her eyes yet again I was still there.

"I don't know." She said lowly.

"What?" There were footsteps before the door opened a little wider and a tall man stood next to the blonde woman, towering over the both of us.

"Hello, Floki." I finally spoke, tilting my head up to get a better look at him. He had a rather....strange air about him. His eyes were light blue, and his hair was a mix of blonde and brown.

"....Hello." He looked around outside behind me, and spotted Garmr. "And who might you be?" He smiled at the creature sat by my side.

"This is Garmr." I gently placed my hand onto his furry head.

"Garmr....like-" He grinned, but I continued.

"My name is Hel." And there was a tenseness in the air.

"....Hel...." Floki mumbled.

"You've got to be joking-" Helga began, but was cut off by Floki raising his hand.

"I apologize if this comes off as rude, but what are you doing here?" The man asked, and I looked down to the wolf while rubbing behind his ear. Though my face was calm, I was frantic on the inside. What should I say? How would I be able to explain what was going on?

"Though I share the name of the guardian of the underworld, I am not her. So, please, relax." Looking back to Floki, I took a slow breath. "My mother gave me the name as it was inspired by not only my father, but also how I look. My father, as I have been told, is-"

"Floki." Helga finished, covering her mouth with her hand as she looked between the man and I. Floki looked as if he had been struck, slowly looking me up and down, studying me. Then, he took a few steps back into the house. Helga watched him, and Garmr trotted into the house. Cautiously entering the home, I saw Floki sitting at the table, running his hand over his face.

"I....have a daughter...." He mumbled. "I have a daughter." He then ran his hand through his hair and held his head. "How....how old are you?" Floki questioned. "Wait, no, that doesn't matter- your mother? Where is she? How did you find me?" His questions weren't accusing, they were out of pure curiosity to allow him to find some sort of meaning in this sudden confusion.

"My mother passed a few months ago, she died a warrior." I simply stated. "She often mentioned Floki of Kattegat to me, so it was rather easy to find you."

"....And the way you look? I'm not complaining, but....are you cursed?" He looked up at me from his seat.

"No. Though it may seem that way, the Seer of our village said it was no curse but a mark."

"A mark?" Helga's brows furrowed.

"You are protected." Floki rose to his feet, a smile pulling at the corners of his lips. "The Seer said the gods are protecting you, yes?"

"In a way, yes." I replied, and the man placed both of his hands onto my cheeks while chuckling.

"The gods have taken so much from me but I remained faithful and now they have blessed me." There was true joy in his eyes, and Helga was also smiling. "Come, eat! You must be hungry." Floki grabbed my hand and led me to the table.

"Let me make you something warm." Helga hurried to the kitchen while Garmr settled in front of the fire.

"You must tell me of yourself." The man waved his hand at me as we sat and my previous anxieties quelled with how he welcomed me with such open arms.

~

Only one day had passed since I had first arrived to the house on the water's edge and Helga had seemingly taken a liking to me to an extreme degree. Floki was talking to me as we were eating a hot meal and his wife was behind my chair, braiding my long hair while humming.

"How did you come to find this wolf at your side?" He questioned, eyeing the animal eating a bit of chicken that had been given to him.

"I was out hunting when I found him as a pup. He was injured and starving- I snuck out food to him without mother knowing until one day he was strong enough to follow me back home." I replied after swallowing what food was in my mouth. "Now he follows me everywhere. What made you want to build boats?" I asked and saw his eyes glitter as he smiled and went into explaining his trade and what drew him to it.


	2. Little Boats

Helga picked up one of the model boats floating in the shallow water to get a closer look at it and I gently nudged another one over the soft currents pushing towards the shore. Floki was behind us, watching how the small boats floated and Garmr was off somewhere in the woods more than likely looking for his own lunch.

It was rather quiet other than the soft splashing of the water and the woodpecker echoing through the trees as a light fog hung over the water. I looked over my shoulder when I heard Floki leaving the shallow and saw another man standing on the sand with a serious look on his face. He was even taller than Floki and his hair was in a long, wrapped braid with the sides cleanly shaven.

He was looking at me until my father reached him and they began to talk quietly.

"Hello, Bjorn." Helga said with a smile while turning to look at the stranger.

"Helga." He gained a soft smile and walked towards the water's edge while the woman left the water, still holding the model boat. "I was just coming to see how the boats were progressing." The man that had been called Bjorn stated as he took a look at the model in Helga's hands.

"What do you say, Helga? What shall we tell him?" Floki questioned.

"We think that it won't be long until you have boats ready and able to take you to the Mediterranean Sea."

"If it exists." My father scoffed, looking out over the water.

"Of course it exists."

"It's just a map, Bjorn. Marks on a paper. A _child_ could have drawn it. How can we know it's real?"

"I learned from my father....the only way to tell if something is real," Bjorn had the small boat now and knelt down to set it back into the water. "is to sail there." He pushed the model towards the other small boats. "I hope you come with me, Floki."

"Are you joking? The lure of an imaginary land? Travelling somewhere that doesn't exist? Of _course_ I'm coming." Floki laughed.

"And I hope you come too, Helga."

"Well, if Floki is mad enough to go, then I guess I will follow." She smiled back at the man and my father slung his arm over Bjorn's shoulders with a fond look in his eyes. There was a deep bond and familiarity between them and they looked as if they could be father and son with how they interacted.

"You must be the stranger Aslaug mentioned." Bjorn looked back at me and Floki raised his hand.

"This is my daughter, Hel."

"So it's true? She's yours?"

"I am." The water splashed as I walked to shallower water and looked into his light blue eyes.

"The people are curious and whispering about you in the market. I am surprised to see that you really look how Aslaug described."

"I am aware my looks aren't common, the surprise is however." Looking over the man with a studious gaze, I slightly tilted my head to the side. "I hope my presence here isn't causing too much trouble."

"Of course not."

"What is this I hear of a Mediterranean Sea?" My eyes slightly narrowed and Bjorn grinned.

~

I heard clashing of metal as I walked through the forest while watching Garmr trotting up ahead while alert and sniffing around. Nearing a clearing, I clicked my tongue and the smokey wolf came to be by my side. Placing my hand onto his head, I rubbed his forehead and ear while coming to the edge of the treeline. I saw what looked like a makeshift training area and saw two men currently having a single handed sword fight.

One man was on his feet, wildly swinging his sword while the other was easily parrying and defending the blows all the while seated on a stump. The one with shorter hair looked to have a higher battle prowess and managed to trap the other male with his sword against his throat. He let the longer haired man go and they had their swords to each other's necks before gaining playful smiles and lowering their weapons. There were two other men and none of them had yet to notice me as I stood there petting Garmr.

The oldest looking male poured some drinks and handed a cup to the one on the stump until the man standing by a tree threw an axe and hit the cup out of his hand with such accuracy. There was only a split second before the short haired man grabbed his own axe and flung it to the tree right behind the blond that had thrown the first axe. Blood slowly dripped down the blond's forehead, showing that the axe that had went over his head had only missed him by a hair's breath.

I slightly tilted my head, silently observing the male on the stump that looked like a predator while staring at the blond. There was a tenseness in the air and I lifted my hand from Garmr's head to slowly clap. All of their heads snapped around to look at me with wide eyes and I stepped further into the clearing.

"You are rather adept." I said calmly. "What is your name?" And it was clear as to who I was talking to as I was looking directly at him. The man with short hair that was cut even shorter on the sides had shockingly blue eyes that stood out in contrast to his tan skin and dark hair.

"....Ivar." He replied, his brows knitting together as my gaze dropped to the bow leaning on the side of the stump.

"Can you shoot as well as you swing and throw?" I asked and he looked to the bow before picking it up and grabbing an arrow. Nocking the arrow, he aimed for the dead deer tied up in a row a good distance away and fired, hitting the deer right in the eye. I felt a smirk twitch at my lips before I went over and took the bow from his hands. The men were all still quietly looking at me as if still in shock from my sudden appearance and unnatural looks.

Taking up an arrow, I too fired and struck the deer's other eye.

"I guess Kattegat is more interesting than I previously thought." I stated while lowering the bow. "Come, Garmr. We should get back before dark." Setting down the bow, I walked back towards the treeline before stopping when one of them raised their voice.

"Wait!" Looking over my shoulder, I saw the short haired male leaning forward with one hand on his knee. "What's your name?"

"Hel." I answered before going back into the woods with the wolf at my side.

~

"I'm glad you could join us." Aslaug smiled at me as I entered through the wooden door. She sat near the head of the table with a smile and the men from the woods were seated as well with Ivar at the head of the table. They all looked at me as Garmr glanced around before going off to find a place to lay down.

"I apologize my father and Helga could not, they are rather busy with the boats."

"That's fine. My intentions for inviting you over for supper were to get to know you anyhow, seeing as you may be staying here a long while to come." She picked up her glass and took a drink while still smiling at me. Taking a seat at the table, they were all still staring at me.

"I can understand that." Glancing up, I watched as some servants placed some food in front of me and filled my cup.

"How are you liking it here in Kattegat so far?" Aslaug quirked up a brow.

"It's rather peaceful. Much quieter than where I come from."

"And where is it that you come from?" Ivar spoke up, seeming to regard me as I got comfortable in my seat.

"A place quite a few days from here." I answered.

"And how are you and your father getting along? Floki's not too troublesome, I hope." Aslaug asked.

"Quite the opposite. He seems rather enthused to have a child even if I am no longer actually a child."

"I see. I think he believes you to be a blessing from the gods after what had happened to his other daughter."

"....Perhaps." I reached for the cup in front of me and brought it to my lips. "The gods do as they will."

"Tell me, what is it that you do? What do you enjoy doing?" The woman questioned me while picking up a knife and cutting into her food.

"I'm a shield maiden, as my mother was until she had me, and I enjoy many things." Turning my attention to the men as I glanced at each of them, I had a relaxed expression. "I hear there is a divide among you on whether to follow Bjorn on his journey or to follow your newly returned father on his. What is it exactly that he plans to do?"

"What is our father's business to you?" One of them asked me, leaning back in his chair while looking at me. Dropping my gaze to my plate, I stabbing the meat with my fork and began to cut off a piece with the knife.

"During his brief stay with my father he asked me to join him." Silence fell as they looked at each other and me. "Of course, he asked Floki as well, but he turned down the offer seeing as he already promised to journey with Bjorn. I have been asked by both of them to join their ranks, but I've made no allegiances. So, tell me, which crazy man is better to follow?" I asked before taking a bite of my food.


	3. Blood of a Deer

The hall was boisterous with the laughing and talking and music. Bjorn's army had arrived earlier that day and were gathered in the hall for a feast along with the families of Kattegat that had chosen to show up.

I was seated next to Helga, listening to her tell stories as we drank. Garmr was curled up on the pelts beneath the thrones to stay out of the way and not risk getting stepped on by one of the drunken men. The smell of cooked meat and ale permeated the air while Floki came over happily with two men following behind him. They greeted Helga with smiles and hugs before my father pulled me to my feet and introduced me.

They paused, seeing the way I looked, but then shook my hand with smiles in a form of greeting. It seemed they were old friends with Helga and Floki that had been to battle together before, and I simply listened to them talk unless they asked me a question to which I replied.

There was only a pause in the conversation as a cheer went up in the hall and I took that as the chance to slip away.

"Skol!" Everyone raised their glasses and I sighed through my nose while sitting on the pelts next to Garmr.

"Is everything all right, Hel?" Alsaug asked as she came over and took a seat on her throne.

"Fine. I just tire of the stares."

"Well, you are a beautiful woman. Men will stare." She chuckled.

"I am an oddity, you mean. I am young with the hair of an old woman and I look like death."

"You do not." She waved her hand. "I will admit that you do lack much color, but that does not make you ugly."

"No, it makes me terrifying. The gods have marked me and it's clear. They fear a curse as any man should."

"But surely you are not cursed." She took a drink from her chalice.

"As far as I am aware, no. But who am I to determine why the gods have made me look this way?" I rose my brows and she simply hummed in reply while taking a drink.

"Are you sure you wish to go into battle? You've only been here for such a short while. These men and women are but strangers to you." Aslaug looked over the people in the hall while I glanced to my father as he was cackling and patting someone on the shoulder.

"I will be honest with you, m'lady, I feel the need to prove myself. What better way than in battle?"

~

There were lit fires, men chanting prayers to the gods as the sacrificial deer was brought to the queen while she was dressed in white and her face painted with black and red. The animal was strung up before Aslaug before she slit it's throat, letting it's blood pool into a bowl below.

Hopefully, the gods would accept this sacrifice and lead us all to victory.

The queen flicked the buck's fresh blood onto her sons to bless them as smaller bowls of it were passed around to the other warriors to also be blessed. The drums grew louder as I dipped one of my hands into the blood in front of me and smeared it across my face. Those that were already blessed were cheering and laughing with their families and friends.

The fires danced all around us as the celebration continued. I knelt down to look Garmr in the eye, anointing him with blood on his forehead and snout. The wolf knew well what this meant, this wouldn't be his first blessing, and threw his head back with a howl. Drunken and laughing people tossed back their heads and joined him in a deafening chorus.

Now it was time to drink and dance in the name of the gods around the built up fires.

~

Cringing and groaning as I woke up, I smelt nothing but....horses....and goats. Cracking open my eyes, I saw that I was laying in a pile of straw and a horse was grazing right at my side. Garmr was curled up in the straw with me and I sat up while rubbing my temples.

"I must say, Garmr, the ale here is _much_ stronger than back home." I grumbled to the wolf and his ear merely flicked.

"I was beginning to wonder if you'd wake up at all." Looking up while shielding my eyes from the light, I saw Ivar sitting near the front of the stable, fiddling with some hay and picking it apart. "You snore like a hog, you know."

"And why were you watching me sleep?"

"I was not watching you sleep. I was merely keeping an eye out for that horse and the goats that have tried many times to eat your hair." He raised his eyebrows while glancing to the mentioned animals. "However, I was tempted to just let them do it. I think it would be rather amusing to see you bald." Sighing, I ran my fingers through my hair that wasn't in braids and carefully got to my feet.

"How kind of you." Dusting myself off, I gave a low whistle and Garmr jumped up and shook his fur free of straw. "What do you want?"

"What makes you believe I want something from you?"

"Why else would you be sitting there watching me sleep in some random stable?"

"I told you, I was not watching you sleep."

"So you say. Have Bjorn's ships left yet?" I tilted my head to the side, bringing my hair over my shoulder to pick out hay from it.

"Still loading up." Ivar replied as I stepped over to the water trough and cupped my hands into the cool water. Taking a drink, I then splashed some more onto my face to help wake myself up.

"Perfect. Come, Garmr. Let us say our goodbyes." Walking past Ivar as I was drying my hands off onto my coat, the horse behind me huffed and shifted on its hooves.

"Aren't you going to thank me?" The man called after me.

"Whatever for?" I asked, glancing around the busy street as people were leading livestock around.

"For not letting you wake to a barren scalp." Ivar's voice was closer behind me, making me glance over my shoulder. However, I didn't see him there and my gaze drifted down to see the blue eyed man on the ground. It took me a second to realize why, and my brows knit together.

"....You're a cripple?"

"....You just noticed?"

"Well, Ivar, every time I have seen you until now you've been seated. My attention wasn't really on your legs either." I stated, watching his expression become hard. "Now I see why people look at you with terror."

"Because I am a cripple?" Ivar snarled and I went back to walking.

"No, because of your skill despite being a cripple. I think it's more intimidating to know that a man that can't even walk can wield a sword so true. Now, are you going to keep following me until I thank you for your selfless deed or can I say goodbye to my father on my own?" I glanced at him with a raised brow, but he did not reply and just stopped where he was. Smirking, I waved over my shoulder. "Good day, Ivar."

~

Looking at the people on Ragnar's ships, it seemed like nearly all of them were old men already about to fall into a grave. _'Why did I let myself get talked into joining Ragnar's crew?'_ I thought while scratching behind Garmr's ear.

There was a change in the atmosphere, and all of the men where looking at something that I had my back to. Turning around, I saw Ivar with what looked like modified crutches assisting him to be upright while his legs drug. They seemed to be made from a strong metal, protecting his arms while the ends that were stabbing into the ground were long spikes.

He had a determined look on his face and a sword strapped to his back as he struggled to get across the wooden slats of the dock. No one moved to help him except for when one of the crutches got stuck between two boards and he fell over. However, the brother that went to help him was calmly stopped by their mother to let Ivar do this on his own.

Tilting my head, I crossed my arms over my chest while leaning onto the side of the boat. Ragnar turned away and climbed into the boat while not looking very pleased. Was he ashamed of his crippled son?

Ivar drug himself the rest of the way with triumph in his eyes and it seemed this was a major feat for him. A victory of his own.

Out on the open water, however, his gall seemed to leave him as he was clinging to the side of the ship and looking rather pale. The only sound that came from any of the three ships were creaking wood and splashing water from the oars pushing the boats onward as the wind wasn't strong enough for the sails alone.

I sat across from Ivar, not saying a word while petting Garmr as he had his head resting in my lap. The skies overhead were grey and cloudy while the faces of the men below were weathered and wrinkled like a plowed field. By the looks of it, the only capable warriors on this ship were a previously missing king, a cripple, and then me.

"You all right?" Ragnar asked his son while standing in front of him. As if in reply, Ivar leaned over the boat and retched.

"....I'm terrified of water." The man said weakly after coughing, and I threw my head back with a laugh.

"Then why in Odin's name are you on a _boat_?" I asked and Ivar only barfed again.

"There's plenty of worse ways to die than to drown." Ragnar said while plopping down between his son and I.

And as if to spite the man, the gods brought forth a boat-killer of a storm only hours after. Rain was pelting down while men fought the sails and waves, trying to tie things down and not fall into the treacherous water. I clung to Garmr as my nostrils were filled with the scent of wet fur and an angry sea while men were shouting. One of the boats had already been lost and the remaining two were barely holding together and the waves grew in size and ferocity.

Well, until we were capsized and flung into the water. I nearly lost a hold on Garmr but caught him by his scruff as we went into the water and had to fight and kick to get to the surface.

I should have followed my father and Bjorn, but no, I had to be swayed by Ivar's words over dinner. ' _Odin, I pray you let us survive at least long enough for me to punch a fool.'_ I thought as my head broke the surface just before another wave came crashing down.


	4. The Saxon Land

I awoke on a beach to Garmr licking my face and I spit while sputtering and sitting up. I could hear gulls and crashing waves and the wolf nuzzled me, happy to see that I was in fact alive. Grunting as I got to my feet, I glanced around the beach and saw washed up broken boards and a few men pulling each other along.

Good. I wasn't the only one alive in foreign lands. A few yards to my left, I saw Ragnar and Ivar and sighed while walking towards them.

"Is he alive?" I asked out loud, pointing to the younger of the two and getting their attention.

"Worried about me, are you?" Ivar gave a lopsided grin while propping himself up onto his elbows and I saw his father's raised brow before I grabbed the front of Ivar's shirt. There was a flash of confusion on his face before I reared back my fist and punched him, dropping him as his head jerked to the side.

"That....is for talking me into this mad revenge plot with a bunch of mad, old men." Ivar seemed to be in shock as he held his jaw and looked up at me. "And you," I turned to Ragnar while pointing at him. "you better be as good as my father tells me or so help me I will tear-" I was cut off by Garmr as he tackled me while wagging his tail and licking my face again. "Garmr! Stop! Quit it! I'm alive! I'm alive!"

~

Building a fire in a moss covered cave on the beach, the wolf was dragging over wood as I was feeding the flame to make it larger. What was left of us were soaked and weary and in need of warmth.

"So, Father, what are we going to do?" Ivar spoke with a tone.

"Your son asked a good question." One of the men stated. "Here we are in deep trouble. So what are you going to do about it?"

"I don't know yet." Ragnar replied.

"Then you better make up your mind....because all this is your fault. You made us sail here, and as far as we know, we- this little group here- are all that's left." Another man spoke up while walking towards the fire and sitting down.

"Where is your army of revenge now, Ragnar Lothbrok? I'll tell you where it is. At the bottom of the sea, feeding the fishes." There was silence afterwards as we all dried of by the fire until we began to make our way off the beach.

Climbing up some rocks, the man that reached the top first dropped to the ground and hissed at us.

"Get down!" And without questioning it we all followed suit. A few seconds passed and the sound of horses went by. Looking up, I counted nine Saxons on horseback in full armor riding along a narrow path. After they passed, Ragnar waved for us to continue and we moved on quickly but quietly until we reached a safe enough spot to actually rest and see what food and supplies we had left.

Garmr was sniffing around while I was redoing my hair into tighter braids to keep it out of the way. Some of the men were putting together something to carry Ivar on so that we could move faster, and I looked to the other men going through supplies. It didn't look like we had much food left, but if the land was good we could find something eventually. Our weapons were at the bare minimum and that seemed to be all that we had left.

We were moving again soon after, going further inland and into the woods for cover. Being vikings, we didn't really have the luxury of being in one place long out in the open on English soil. Going along a path, the dead leaves crunched under our feet as we were walking for who knows how long until Garmr's ears perked to attention and he put his nose to the air.

"Stop." I raised my voice, looking at the wolf as he seemed to be listening to something. The men and women paused, staring at me and Garmr. Not but a few seconds after and the sound of a girl singing in another language could be heard. Scrambling off the path, we hid behind the trees and waited as the singing grew louder.

The smokey wolf seemed to have other plans, though, as he remained on the path despite me waving and clicking my tongue at him.

"Garmr!" I hissed lowly, but his ear only flicked in response. "Bloody wolf." I grit my teeth, seeing the girl coming into view. Ducking behind a tree, I kept an eye on the beast as he wasn't moving an inch. The girl was there now and had stopped singing as she stared at Garmr with frightful eyes. The wolf dropped his head, but his tail was not signalling for attack, and the two just stared at each other for a moment until the girl finally spoke.

"A-Are you hungry?" She shifted on her feet and still Garmr made no move. "I don't have any meat on me, but-but you can have some of these." The girl hesitantly reached into the basket she carried where harvested mushrooms were piled and tossed some to the wolf. Garmr took a step forward, his eyes still on the girl, and gently picked up the mushrooms before bolting in the opposite direction. _'What has gotten into him?'_ I thought and the girl simply went back to singing and continuing on her way.

~

"Where's that beast of yours?" A large man questioned while sitting down next to me. We had set up camp and some fires to cook our dinner and Garmr had yet to return.

"How should I know? He's an animal. He does as he wishes." I replied, biting into the poultry still warm in my hands.

"It seems it knows we was talkin' about it." I glanced up at the man's words and saw Garmr trotting up, the mushrooms he had gotten from that girl in his mouth.

"Oi, what was that whole act for?" I questioned and the wolf dropped the mushrooms into my hand. "I appreciate the gesture, Garmr, but we have food." Chuckling, I put the mushrooms to the side and tore off a piece of meat for him to eat.

"It's like a big dog." The man scoffed and reached out to pet Garmr but the wolf growled and snapped at the man, making him rear back and fall off the log we were sitting on. Those that saw what had happened started laughing and I tore off more meat to give Garmr.

~

Waking up in the dead of night to hear Garmr snarling and growling, I jumped to my feet and saw Ivar swiftly kill four people within mere seconds. Ragnar was slitting the throats of those that were sleeping and others were waking to the sound of the struggle only to die shortly after. The sound of my sword being drawn brought the attention of the father and son to me as I stood prepared to fight if need be.

"Lower your sword, Hel. Our blades are not aimed at you."

"Why should I believe you after what I just saw?" I snarled my eyes flitting between the two men looking at me.

"You are Floki's daughter- I would not harm a hair on your head." Ragnar had one hand raised and the other was covered in blood while holding a knife. "I would not betray my best friend so." He began to lower his blade while Ivar sighed and tilted his head.

"I told you we should have told her."

"I couldn't risk it."

"Told me what? Risk what?" I questioned, remaining cautious and ready to fight.

"That soldiers have already found the wreckage by now and will be looking for us. We can't travel with all these people safely." Ragnar explained. "With just the three of us, we can move about more quickly and quietly."

"Were these not your men?" I glanced to the dead around the camp. "Were these not your allie-"

"No." Ragnar clenched his jaw. "They were bribed to follow me. Men fighting for money or to die a warrior." There was a pause with tension thick in the air as they both were looking at me still.

"....What is your plan?" I raised a hand in front of Garmr to quiet him.

~

"How do you know we are going in the right direction, Father?" Ivar questioned as he was hanging over Ragnar's shoulders like a lame sheep.

"All roads lead to the throne."

"Sounds good, but it's probably wrong." Ivar laughed as Garmr and I followed the two.

"That can't really be- Woah!" Ragnar grabbed my arm while diving behind some bushes and making us all lay flat on the ground. The wolf followed suit this time around as the sounds of horses and clanking armor neared. Maybe fifteen to twenty soldiers galloped past without noticing us hidden in the foliage at all. Ragnar sighed with relief and chuckled while sitting up. Ivar did the same and look to his father.

"I bet you wish you'd never brought me along. Right? And I bet you wish you would have killed me when I was born, just like you wanted to."

"Only when you talk." Ragnar grinned, handing some food to his son that had been wrapped in cloth. The older male then handed some of the dried meat to me and half of it went to Garmr. "I thought your legs were a weakness. That you wouldn't survive." Ragnar shrugged. "I was wrong. Your legs have given you a strength, a strength that even your brothers don't have. You are like a deaf man whose eyesight is sharper than anyone else. You are special, not in spite of your legs, but because of them."

"I think....that's the first time you've ever admitted to being wrong." Ivar replied and I just looked at the two flatly.

"That will never happen again, so enjoy it."

"I am drug into a battle of revenge that is thwarted from the start by a storm that nearly kills me, wake up to you two killing what's left of us, and now I have to sit and listen to your family issues."

"Shut up, Hel, no one forced you to come." Ivar popped off. "Why are you even here to begin with? It was not your people that were killed in the settlement."

"I blame you and that sharp tongue of yours." I pointed to the younger of the two men. "Got a way with words, he does. Made this whole thing sound interesting and fun when in truth it's hiding in the bushes and eating dried meat."

"I guess that just makes you more stupid and gullible than I thought."

"Want me to punch you again?"

"Now, children- behave." Ragnar chuckled while getting to his feet and pulling out some rope to fashion a sort of handle from it. Carefully getting Ivar onto his back this time instead of slinging him over his shoulders, Ragnar held the ends of the rope handle while Ivar grabbed the looped part. Once the younger male was situated on the older male's back, we left the bushes and walked on.

The sun was higher in the sky now as we entered a foggy clearing. There were a few large, fallen trees and there was a slight chill in the air. Garmr was walking ahead of us while sniffing around and Ivar suddenly leaned back while clicking his tongue and hitting his father's side.

"Come on, donkey!" He chuckled and Ragnar just gave him a look in return while shaking his head. "What if we're walking in the wrong direction, hmm?"

"Then we'll turn around and walk the other way." Ragnar replied before braying like a donkey.

"What is it about you?" Ivar shook his head while smiling.

"What?"

"Well, you do not seem to accept the verdict of the gods."

"What is their verdict? You tell me."

"If you want to know if the gods still favor you, then look around. Look at us."

"You give the gods....too much credit." Ragnar stated while panting from the effort of carrying his son.

"Oh, so you disagree with all of us? With the Seer, with everyone?"

"What if I do? Huh?"

"....Well, then I guess that....is why you are who you are. I never thought of that before. You were just my famous father. I thought you must have got lucky because the gods chose you, but....maybe that is not true." And quiet returned as we crossed the clearing and back into the woods. The sun continued it's journey across the sky and it wasn't until after we crossed a field that we saw a town.

Ragnar grunted and set Ivar down beside a hay cart's wheel.

"We made it." Ragnar panted before turning to his son. "Once we get inside, we will be separated. If you are smart, you will not be hurt." He then put his hand onto Ivar's cheek. "When I can, I will find you."

"I know what to do. I think you brought me here for a reason."

"No matter what they do to me....you have to act like a cripple, and then they won't feel threatened by you. Hel, you must act as if you are blind and Garmr sees for you." Ragnar looked from me to the wolf at my side.

"And what are they going to do to you?" I asked the older man. Ragnar sighed without answering and took the knife from Ivar's sheath and stuck it into the hay cart. The man motioned for my sword and I hesitated in giving it to him. He stuck it beside the knife and Ivar clenched his jaw.

"So I'm....I'm going to watch you being hurt? Sound like a good plan." Ivar stated and Ragnar scoffed. Grabbing his son's face, he kissed his forehead and gave him a reassuring smile. Ragnar gave me the rope handle for me to tie around Garmr to hold on to. Sighing through my nose, I stared straight ahead at nothing in particular to play at being blind.

Ragnar took the lead, walking onto the worn road with Ivar crawling at his right side while Garmr and I were on his left. We got about halfway to the town before the watchmen on the wall shouted and raised their bows. We all stopped and Ragnar cautiously raised his hands in surrender. 


	5. Ragnar Falls

Men on horses came through the gate and surrounded us. Garmr shifted on his paws at my side and I fought the urge to look behind me where some more horses were.

A man called from the wall in a foreign tongue and Ragnar took a step forward to answer. The officer said something else and Ragnar replied as the horses still circled.

The officer raised his hand and some soldier helped to put Ivar onto a horse. Any of them that tried to come near me, however, got snapped and growled at by Garmr.

Ragnar said something to make the men back off and did the low whistle that I did to call Garmr. The wolf did nothing, so I gave him a slight nudge with my leg and he began to walk towards the older man, leading me as I held the rope still.

Entering the walls, the people that had been in the street were all standing off to the side, staring and nervously shifting. Everything seemed fine at least, until a man came out and raised his voice.

The man dressed in black cloth and chain mail then screamed before more men surrounded Ragnar and beat him to the ground while the man that had yelled was laughing. My grip on the rope tightened as my body screamed to fight and run out of there, but I would risk all of our lives in doing so.

Ragnar was bloody before he was knocked out, and some soldier tried to grab my arm until Garmr tried to bite his leg. The soldier barely stepped back in time and Ivar spoke up.

"Don't touch her! She's only blind." But I doubted anyone actually understood what he said. However, no one else tried to grab at me or Garmr.

~

A few days passed as I was locked in a room with Garmr and a few guards at the door. I was growing impatient and was tiring of this facade I had to put on. I was restless and nearly reached for my absent sword when the door swung open before I was lead out with the wolf in front of me as I held the rope.

I was brought into a room were a long table was and saw Ivar seated on one side while his father was in a cage at one end of the table and an old man was at the head. The old man eyed Garmr with a raised brow and a chair was brought up behind me and someone gently touched my arm to get me to sit. Garmr's head peaked over the table as he looked around and there was a few seconds of quiet.

"You all right, Hel?"

"Fine." I replied. "Garmr is close to eating a guard. Or a few." Ivar chuckled a bit and Ragnar looked to the old man and spoke in their tongue. The old man said something in return and food was offered to Ivar and I. Ivar looked to his father and the older man nodded.

"It's safe to eat." Ivar told me and I hesitated before halving my food with Garmr and digging in to the meat and sweet fruit on the plate before me. Garmr seemed to enjoy it while scarfing it down in a matter of seconds, but as soon as the food was gone, the old man at the head of the table spoke and Ivar and I were taken from the room.

"Don't fuck with them." Ivar told his father, and the men on either side of Garmr and I were taking us in a different direction from before, following the soldiers that had Ivar. We were put into the same room this time and once the door was close, I let the wolf go and he sniffed out the room.

"Your father better know what he is doing." I stated.

"There's no telling with him." Ivar raised his brows as I leaned against the stone wall. There was no light except for where the sun came in through the barred windows and I sat down as the wolf marked a corner of the room.

~

More days passed but this time we were being fed and Ivar was there to converse with rather than just an animal that couldn't respond. The blue eyed man possessed more complexities than I had previously thought, and I found his tales with he and my father to be rather amusing.

We passed the time that way, him telling stories of his childhood or fights with his brothers and I would tell of the harsh training my mother put me through or the scraps with the other villagers. Today, however, Ivar was playing a board game with some young boy with straight, dark brown hair that went to his shoulders. They played in silence and I had no clue what the game was as they moved the different colored pieces across the board.

The boy was too focused on the game to notice my observation as I stared at the differently shaped pieces that were either black or white. The board itself was made of etched squares that were alternating the same colors. It seemed as if Ivar was winning with his cocky smile, but the boy moved a piece that made him look at the boy with moderate surprise. Ivar made a face and nodded as if he acknowledged the kid's skill and I just sat there not having a clue what was going on.

Some guards came in and said something I didn't understand and took Ivar away. The boy and I sat there in silence alone before he seemed to get an idea and pushed the game and pieces towards me. He said nothing, knowing that I didn't speak his language, and softly grabbed my hand. Garmr perked up, watching closely but doing nothing as the boy placed one of the pieces into my hand to feel it.

It was made from carved wood and I ran my fingers over the smoothed surface. It was shaped like a horse's head and the boy said something.

"Horse." He said and my brows furrowed. "Horse." And then I understood- he was telling me what it was in his language.

"Horse." I mumbled.

"Horse." He nodded and took the piece to hand me another one to feel since he believed me to be blind still. This one was shaped a bit like a tower on a castle. I knew about how the English had big castles from stories in the village and some carvings I had seen in the market. "Tower."

"....Tower." I mimicked while rolling the piece over in my hands. This continued as he told me what each piece was and even showed me the board. Well, at least now I knew _some_ words of their language.

The boy was then telling me how other things were said in his language, like his name, articles of clothing, and even what Garmr was called to them. It was as he was telling me what the table was that some guards came in to take me away. I was taken outside and put onto the back of a cart with Ivar and he had a hard look on his face.

"What's going on?" I asked him and he only briefly looked up at me.

"We're going home."

"Where's your father?"

"Not coming."

"But-" And I cut myself off, seeing the look in his eyes that were like a harsh storm over the sea. That anger I had seen in the woods when he looked like a predator was there and I sighed through my nose while getting Garmr to lay down.

The boy from before quietly came over and gave a game piece to Ivar that looked like a little warrior holding a shield. The boy gave a hard smile to the man before turning to me and touching my hand.

"Hel." He said as if it were a form of farewell.

"Alfred." I nodded, and the man holding the reigns at the front of the cart urged the horse to move, making the cart leave the town. Ivar and I were silent the entire ride as the cart went over the uneven ground.

The boat for us was fully stocked with food and fresh water and I could finally drop the act of being blind as I unfurled the sails while we were in the open water. Ivar was vomiting again until he got used to the rocking waves by nightfall, and we cracked into the first crate of food to fill our bellies.

"So what do you plan on doing?" I asked him, ripping apart a loaf of bread. "About your father and Kattegat."

"....My brothers and I will make England pay." Ivar stated with conviction and I eyed Garmr as he grabbed some dried meat from the crate.

"Do you have an actual plan or is it just that vague thought?"

"I have a few ideas, but I've yet to decide."

"And how will we explain only the two of us and a wolf being the only survivors of three boats?"

"The gods and our circumstances." He replied and Garmr dropped the meat into Ivar's lap, making the man's face twist with varying emotions.

"He likes you." I chuckled. "He's sharing."

"That's....nice, but it is covered in drool." The man wasn't even touching the meat in his lap while Garmr was wagging his tail and looking at Ivar.

"Don't be a baby, his breath is better than most. Also, I'd advise you eat it. You reject a gift of food from Garmr and he'll turn you into food instead." Ivar's piercing blue eyes looked at me before turning to the large wolf panting by his face. He cringed and picked the dried meat up while I was chuckling and biting into my bread.

I watched with amusement as the man ate the drool covered meat before Garmr sniffed at him to make sure he ate it all. Seeming content, the wolf then plopped down on Ivar and my head fell back with laughter.

It took a few more days to get back home to Kattegat with the small boat, but when we arrived we were greeted by familiar faces and two of Ivar's brothers were there to help him out of the boat. However, as I was looking around, something seemed different....

"Where is our father?" Sigurd questioned as we sat inside from the cold.

"Where is Ragnar?" Ubbe asked when no answer came.

"....King Ecbert handed him over to King Aelle, knowing that Aelle would kill him." Ivar said lowly and I tossed another lump of wood into the fire.

"Why would he give him to Aelle?" Ubbe looked confused.

"It doesn't matter. Our father is probably dead by now. And we will have to avenge him. _That_ is what matters." Ivar stated, but Ubbe gave Sigurd a look as if they had something they needed to tell Ivar but neither one knew which of them would say it. Sigurd seemed to be the one to do it as he sat on the corner of the table by Ivar.

"We have something to tell you. Something private." The blond gave me a look and Ivar turned to his brother.

"It's fine. She can be trusted. What is it?" There was quiet as Ubbe leaned forward and rested his elbows onto his knees, a grim look on his face. "Ubbe?" But the man said nothing.

"....Mother is dead." Sigurd stated and Ivar looked at his brothers with disbelief.

"It's true." Ubbe Spoke up. "Lagertha killed her. Lagertha is now Queen of Kattegat. And mother is dead." The only thing that could be heard was the crackling fire and Ivar's expression darkened as their words sunk in. I watched as he picked up the game piece that Alfred had given him and grip it so tightly in his fist that blood began to pour from his hand.

Ivar was furious.


	6. Odin Thunder

"Today marks a new dawn for Kattegat. For all of us. We do not know King Ragnar's fate, or whether he will ever return. You have not been ruled properly for a long time, and many things have been neglected. Kattegat has changed so much in the last few years. It has grown and flourished. By all account it is now the largest, richest trading center in Norway." Legertha declared and the crowd whispered.

"Which means that others are bound to be envious of our success. And they must look at us and wonder why we make so little effort to protect ourselves. It is my belief that we should begin to build fortifications, ditches, and palisades around this site. And it is my hope, as your Queen, that everyone, men, women, and children, the fit and the wounded, will contribute to this great work. Those who share my belief, say 'Aye'." Lagertha rose from the throne while looking over the people in the hall.

"Aye!" The crowd clapped and cheered until they suddenly parted as there was thudding. Looking, I saw Ivar dragging himself across the floor with a spike in each hand. Ubbe set out a stool before the queen for Ivar to sit upon, and the woman's face hardened.

"Welcome, Ivar."

"I've come here for justice." The man stated. "Everyone knows that you killed my mother for no reason except ambition. Therefore, I demand justice."

"Ivar." Ubbe put a hand on Ivar's shoulder.

"Don't touch me, coward." The younger brother growled, pushing Ubbe's hand off of him.

"He is not a coward." Lagertha stepped down from where the throne was to stand in front of Ivar. "But perhaps he understands some things that you don't." The woman set her hand onto Ivar's shoulder and it seemed as if she were looking down at him in more ways than one.

"I understand everything perfectly. You _murdered_ my mother in cold blood." His voice was eerily calm and Lagertha dropped her hand to her side. "I want revenge. I challenge you to single combat." The crowd began to murmur.

"I refuse."

"You can't refuse."

"I refuse to fight you, Ivar Lothbrok, son of Ragnar." Lagertha raised her voice, backing away with her hands folded in front of her.

"Why? Hm?" Ivar tilted his head as Lagertha stepped back to her throne.

"I don't want to kill you." She answered and Ivar chuckled while scratching his head with one of the spikes.

"Who says you will kill me?"

"I do."

"All right. Don't fight me, then. I don't care. Just as long as you know that one day, I will kill you, Lagertha. Your fate is fixed." Observing her face as Ivar's words struck her, she seemed to be trying to hide her unease but those eyes of hers gave her away. She was scared of Ivar just like the rest of them.

There was good reason to be.

~

"Come now, is that all you've got?" I chuckled with my sword raised and in a fighting stance. I lacked a shield, but one wasn't really needed when our weapons were made of wood. I had been asked to spar by one of Lagertha's shieldmaidens- the bravest one to approach me- because they were curious about my skills. However, the fight with the shieldmaiden had long since passed as I was now fighting a man that had witnessed the fight and wanted a chance at battling me.

"Just wait, I'm only warming up." He wiped his bloody nose with the back of his fist before raising his wooden sword and lunging at me with a roar. Diving under his arms, I swung my blunt sword to the backs of his knees and sent him to the ground. Hitting his upper back, he fell flat on his face as I twisted on my feet.

Grabbing the back of his shirt, I yanked him up and placed my weapon against his throat.

"I believe this is win for me. Again. Do you wish for yet another round?" I grinned as he spit blood and the crowd watching parted as Lagertha stepped forward.

"Why are none of you working? There are things to be done." The people left with her words to go back to building the structures she wanted made to protect Kattegat. The queen turned to me as I let the larger man go and she sighed through her nose. "Why are you fighting?"

"Sparring." I corrected, handing my wooden sword back to the shieldmaiden I had borrowed it from.

"Sparring?" Her gaze drifted to the bruised and bloody man dunking his face into some water. "If you wish to spar, then please do so with those not in the middle of work." Lagertha nodded to me before walking away with the shovel she had in her hands. Watching her leave, I then gave a low whistle to Garmr and walked in the opposite direction she had gone.

Stopping by the blacksmith, the wolf remained outside away from the sparks and fire.

"Has my sword been finished yet?" I asked the dirty man hammering out some metal to straighten it. He placed the metal into some water, causing it to hiss and sizzle as he also set down the hammer.

"Here it is." He picked up a sword and held it out to me. "You remember the payment?"

"I do." Without even looking at him, I handed him some coins while inspecting the workmanship of the blade. I checked the weight of it in my hands and its balance. "This is good work. Thank you." The man only grunted in reply and went back to work after pocketing his pay. Glancing over to the other man banging on some red hot metal, I noticed it was Ivar. I didn't speak out, not wanting to bother him, and left to return to the house on the water's edge.

"Garmr, what do you want to eat?" I asked the wolf as I walked through the door. "Do you-" I was cut off by his growling and my head jerked up to see a man dressed in black standing in the middle of the room. I reached for my sword, but he raised a hand as if to stop me and I paused. Garmr even stopped baring his teeth at the stranger missing an eye.

"I came to see the sons of Ragnar, but I see that you are here now as well." His voice was low as he stepped towards me and reached out a hand. The man brushed some of my hair out of my face and cupped my cheek. "You are on the right path here, child. Do not stray from it. We are watching over you, little Hel."

I blinked and the man was gone. Falling to my knees, my gaze was directed to right in front of me but I wasn't really looking at anything. Thunder rumbled outside as a storm was churning in the sky.

"Odin." I whispered as rain began to fall.


	7. Floki's Home

"Hel. I would like to speak with you." Looking over, I saw Ivar pulling himself up onto the log I was sitting on. Garmr came bounding over with a wagging tail and a lolling tongue, seeming rather happy to see the viking.

"About?" I questioned, going back to looking out over the water while idlely spinning my knife into the sand.

"I want you to join us, my brothers and I, back to England. We need as many warriors as we can get." Ivar stated while running his hands through the wolf's thick fur.

"Is this journey going to get me nearly drowned again?" I questioned and the man scoffed.

"Not unless the gods wish it."

"Oh, that's a real comfort."

"Come. You missed the battle you were promised the last time." Ivar smiled as Garmr licked his cheek. "I will have my brothers there, but I will need someone I can trust to watch my back not because of our blood."

"If there's anything I've learned about you since I got here, it's that you're crazy." I sighed and his smile fell. "So, _someone_ has to make sure you don't get yourself into too much shit. Being your only friend, I guess that job falls to me, now doesn't it?" I grinned while looking at Ivar and a smile slowly grew on his lips.

"Friend?"

"Of course we're friends. I told you some of my embarrassing childhood stories- I have to make sure you tell no one else." Pointing at him with the knife, I then raised my brows while tilting my head down. "Not to mention I had to smell your stink for weeks and sail us home."

"Oh, I stink, do I?" He chuckled.

"Awfully."

"Well, you smell even worse- like wet wolf fur."

"Donkey breath."

"At least I don't snore like a boar."

"Oh, but you do. Worse, even. Like rumbling storm clouds. You're so awful that you make Garmr howl."

"He's not howling right now. In fact, I think he likes me quite a bit." Ivar gave a cocky grin while looking at me and I glanced to the wolf getting a belly rub while he was kicking his leg. I threw my head back to howl and Garmr shot up to howl as well.

"Told you." I laughed and the blue eyed man scoffed.

~

Over twenty ships arrived one day in the fjord- the beginnings of the great army the Ragnar sons were forming. The hall that night was filled with music and laughter and drinking to greet the new arrivals, and I was sat near one of the walls with Garmr.

I was drinking while polishing my sword and Garmr was curled up at my feet. Setting down my cup, I picked the rag back up and went back to work, not really interacting with the others around me. However, that didn't seem to phase one drunken man that took a seat in front of me while smiling.

"You've got strange hair for a young woman." He stated and his eyebrows rose a bit when I looked at him. "And eyes."

"You've got a strange face for a young man." I popped off, seeing how his face was covered in tattoos and scars. His hair was bald on the sides while the top was pulled back into a long braid and he had some blond scruff on his jaw.

"I must ask," He leaned forward, gesturing to me with his cup half-full of ale while resting his elbow onto his knee. "is all of your hair such a pure white?" I flatly looked at him as he took a drink. Saying nothing, I just went back to my sword until he placed a hand on my leg just above my knee and Garmr started to growl. "Fine, if you don't want to answer, why not let me see for myself?"

Smacking his hand off of my thigh, I stomped my foot onto the chair between his legs and fisted my hand in the front of his shirt. Holding the edge of my sword just beneath his chin, he quickly raised his hands with his eyes wide.

"Now, now, Hel. Why not lower your sword?" My eyes glanced to the side and I saw Ivar watching me with amusement.

"Don't worry, I won't kill your warrior, Ivar. I'm simply letting him know in a clear way that I'm refusing his proposition to sleep with him."

"....I think you made him piss himself." Ivar raised his brows and I jerked back, seeing the man's pants were indeed wet before he shot up from his seat and ran out.

"Ew, it's on my boot!" I cringed while trying to get my boot off without touching the urine and Ivar burst into laughter. "Shut it, you heathen!"

"Hel, you're a heathen too!" Ivar was still laughing as I tossed my boot.

"Yeah, well, you're more of a heathen." I grumbled.

"What is going on over here?" Ubbe asked while walking over. "Hel, where is your shoe?" His question sent Ivar into another laughing fit and I huffed while sitting back down.

A good while later, the hall suddenly fell utterly silent as men with blades grabbed all of Legertha's shieldmaidens and loyal followers. Ubbe and Ivar were in the middle of the room holding weapons and Lagertha slowly rose from her throne. She grabbed her sword and stepped down to where they were, knowing well what their intentions were. Ubbe raised his axe, walking to be behind the queen while Ivar was in front of her.

Suddenly, the front doors burst open and Bjorn and his men were there. What timing.

"If you kill her, my brothers, you'll have to kill me too." Bjorn calmly said.

"Maybe we should." Ivar popped off.

"Shut up." Ubbe told him. "She killed our mother." He then told Bjorn.

"I know. You want revenge. So would I. But more importantly, we have to avenge our father. That is why I came back." Bjorn looked down at Ivar. "And _that_ is what we're going to do." Lagertha threw down her sword with victory in her eyes.

Ivar and Ubbe left the hall, the younger of the two looking furious.

"Hel!" I turned my attention to see my grinning father coming at me with outstretched arms.

"Father! Welcome back!" I smiled while hugging him.

"I'm so glad to see you alive." His hug tightened and I knew he had heard of what happened in England.

"You, too, old man."

~

The girl sitting next to Helga kept staring at me and Garmr, but I was used to being stared at so it didn't bother me much. Helga was blowing on some food to cool it down for the girl while Floki was working at a table in the corner.

"Please. You must eat. Tanaruz." Helga said while holding the wooden spoon near the girl's mouth.

"Ah, ah." The girl turned away and the front door opened as Ivar came in while panting before sighing as he looked to my father.

"Hello, Floki. Helga. Hel." He nodded to each of us.

"Ivar." My father replied and the younger man crawled over to sit by the fire to get warm after coming all of the way here.

"So, who's this?" Ivar asked while looking at the girl.

"Her name is Tanaruz." Helga answered while running her fingers through the girl's hair.

"Oh, you brought her back? She'll make a good slave, I'm sure."

"She is _not_ a slave." The blond woman snapped. "We are adopting her. She is my child."

"Ah!" Ivar looked a bit thrown as he looked from Floki back to Helga. "Well, let's see." He reached over to move her hair out of her face, but the girl gasped and tried to get as far away from Ivar as she could. "I won't hurt you."

"Shh, it's all right." Helga tried to calm the girl as she screamed. "Don't be afraid." The woman led the girl to the kitchen and I lightly kicked Ivar's side.

"Ass."

"What? I didn't do anything!"

"I bet it was your hideous face." I mused while leaning back in my chair.

"I'm hurt you would say such a thing." He feigned a look of surprise while holding a hand over his heart.

"It's very sweet of you to drag your crippled arse all the way over here to see me."

"Why do you think I want anything from you, you spindly legged, knock kneed boat-builder?"

"It's nice to see how much you've matured since I've been away."

"Matured? What, you think I want to be an old fool like you?" Ivar pointed at Floki.

"The way you behave, dear Ivar, you've never get the chance." My father waved his knife at the younger man. They looked at each other for a second before cracking and bursting into laughter. Floki went over and picked Ivar up in a hug before dropping him down into a seat and sitting next to him.

"Wonderful. Now I'll never be able to rid of you if Father likes you that much." I popped off. "And Garmr." I added flatly when the wolf flopped onto Ivar, being riled up after seeing Floki and Ivar interact. Garmr was wagging his tail and licking Ivar's face while the man under him was shouting and trying to push the large animal off of himself.

"Oh!" He gasped when one of Garmr's paws went right into his gut.

"Come now, Garmr, off the cripple." Floki pat the wolf's side and he hopped back to the floor. "Good to see the both of you get along with Ivar so well."

"Actually," Ivar spoke up. "there might be something that you can do for me."

"Oh?"

"Now that we're going to England to fight, it's about time I didn't have to crawl about. Especially on the battlefield. I wonder....if you could help me, Floki." Ivar gave the older man a serious look.

"I'll figure something out." My father replied and Ivar grinned. Floki turned to me after Ivar left and sat back in his chair at the table with still looking at me.

"What?"

"Believe me, I'm glad that boy has finally made a friend, but what happened to make you two so close?" He quirked up an eyebrow and I shrugged.

"We had to spend a lot of time in each other's company in England. It was either get along or beat the shit out of each other." I answered. "I already punched him once, so I guess that made him not want to get on my bad side." I chuckled and Floki just shook his head. "I'm joking, Father. Not about punching him, though, I actually did that. But....Ivar's not that bad once you get to know him." I crossed my arms over my chest while shrugging again. "Don't piss him off and he's good company."

"Oh, I see how it is." Floki smirked, pointing at me as he turned back to the work on the table.

"What?" He just shook his head and my brows furrowed. "What?"


	8. Blood Eagle

More and more people were arriving in Katteget every day to aid in the battle to avenge Ragnar. They were coming from all over Norway, Sweden, and even Denmark. The streets were flooded with people and Garmr was often in the woods hunting and bringing home his kill as the snow had already come. He was catching mostly rabbits and birds, but it was enough to feed us along with what food was stored.

Ubbe was even marrying a woman that used to be their family slave and the wedding was being held in a clearing in the woods. Many of people that showed up to attend had even bathed for the occasion.

"Who gives this woman away to her new husband?"

"I do." Hvitserk stepped forward and gave a ring to the woman standing by Ubbe and the blonde he was marrying. The woman took the ring and dipped it into a bowl of blood to bless it before returning to the two facing each other. She handed the bloody, golden band to Ubbe who then put the ring onto the blonde's finger.

"And so I name you man and wife. And may the gods bless you, and give you many children, and may they keep the wolf from the door." She flicked blood onto the couple before they kissed and people shook bells and cheered.

Until Garmr howled after dropping a bloody hare right next Ivar.

"Look, Ubbe. He's brought a wedding gift." Ivar popped off while picking up the dead animal by it's ears. The man chuckled while the wolf was panting, looking as if he was smiling and Ubbe rolled his eyes.

"Garmr, you turd." I waved my hand. "Sorry, everyone. Please, continue on."

"Very good. And now, the bridal race!" Ubbe and Hvitserk bolted to start the race through various obstacles as people cheered. They were pushing each other while dodging people swinging sticks at them and it was rather amusing to watch until it was over when Ubbe beat his younger brother to the finish line. Hvitserk was now the one that had to serve the feast.

Only a number of people were at the table in the brothers' home and I along with the bride were the only women present. The only reason I was there at the feast was because of how well I knew the brothers.

They were laughing and having a good time and Ivar whistled at Hvitserk like he was a dog.

"Come here, boy! My horn is empty." Hvitserk came over with a pitcher of ale and refilled his brother's drink before Sigurd tossed his over his shoulder.

"Mine, too." That caused more laughter and the bride shook her glass at Hvitserk to tell that her glass was empty. He went to fill her drink instead of his brother's. Garmr and Ubbe's old hound were running around the table, their claws scrabbling across the wooden flooring.

"Hel! Get your wolf! He's making a mess!"

"Garmr." I called before whistling and the large animal flew over some of the men sitting across the table and ended up landing with one foot on my plate. They all burst into more laughter as food had sprayed onto me and I shook it off, splattering it onto those sitting by me as the wolf was panting in my face. "Garmr!" The wolf was all hyped up and his tail was wagging as he looked to do a little dance before tackling me.

My chair fell back and the smokey wolf and I started wrestling on the floor. I was laughing and buzzed and some of the men were cheering while stomping on the floor. Ubbe's dog joined and I was at the bottom of a dog pile. I managed to somehow get to my feet and dashed around the table past Hvitserk that jumped out of the way as the wolf and dog were chasing me.

Laughing, I grabbed the back of Ivar's chair and swung him around to put him right in their way, making him spill some of his drink.

"No! No, no, no, no!" He put his hands out to stop the two, but they just jumped on him, knocking back him and the chair and sending his ale flying. Everyone was howling with laughter as the man on the floor was drowning in slobber. "Hel!" Ivar shouted before spitting and trying to wave the animals off of him.

~

The night of the sacrifice for the blessings in war, a man was offered up instead of a deer. He was dressed in white and went willingly, knowing that he would be feasting with the gods for giving his life for victory. Lagertha came out with her owl on her shoulder and Floki had to put a hand onto Ivar's shoulder to keep him seated.

The man being sacrificed was not tied up like the deer had been, but he was holding onto some rope tied to two pillars on either side of him. I didn't much like watching human sacrifices, so I instead looked to the sky to prepare myself before watching the man's death to honor him before he went to meet the gods. Lagertha must have noticed because she did too and others followed suit, gasping as bright masses arched across the night sky.

Floki was whispering his own prayers beside me while Helga had a hand over Tanaruz's eyes, not wanting her to watch as the man was impaled on a curved blade in Lagertha's hands.

~

I couldn't even count how many ships were in the water bearing different colors that were all united under the same cause. Our travel was an easy one as no storm crossed our path. Marching up the beach and further inland, it wasn't even a day before we were met by an English army. My father, the Ragnar sons, and the leaders of each faction in our army were in the front lines and I finally got to see what Floki had built for Ivar.

A roman styled war chariot.

Looking to the English army made me laugh. There were only a few hundred of them and _thousands_ of _us_. A war cry rang out among the vikings and I threw my head back to howl with Garmr while banging my sword onto the front of my shield.

"RAGNAR!" Bjorn shouted and our ranks advanced.

And the battle was over so quickly that night had yet to even fall before the last English soldier did.

It was raining as Ivar's chariot drug the king we had taken captive through the mud. We stopped on a road in the woods and Bjorn untied the king's feet before pulling him up and talking lowly.

"Show us where my father died." There was no answer so the oldest son smacked the king with the back of his hand. "Show us!" He shouted and the king nodded while looking to a clearing at our side. Sigurd took hold of the kind with an axe to his throat as we searched through the dead leaves until Bjorn found wooden boards covering a pit. "This...is the place?" Bjorn asked while pointing and the king nodded again.

Bjorn waved his hands and the rest of us found chains to pull open the pit. The rain was still pouring down as we looked inside and saw nothing but mud and dead leaves.

"This....is where our father was killed." Ivar stated.

"How the little piggies will grunt....when they hear how the old boar suffered."

"How much gold and silver do you want to spare my life?" The fat king's voice shook. "Name your price. Anything. Anything!"

"You are mistaken. My father was worth far more than gold and silver. That is not the price you must pay." Ivar growled through grit teeth. My father nudged Sigurd to the side and grabbed the front of the king's shirt as he fell to his knees.

"I've been told your god is a carpenter. And guess what? So am I." The storm went on, the rain washing the blood on us away the best it could, and I felt a sadistic grin pull at the corners of my lips when the king glanced around and his eyes got stuck on me. He began to cry as I pet Garmr's head and no one had to ask why the king was wailing.

I looked like a personification of death with my pale and lifeless appearance, covered in the blood of English warriors that stuck out even more in contrast to my complexion. The smokey wolf at my side was no different as he licked his bloody maw.

By nightfall, Floki was hammering nails into the kings hands with the back of an axe, fires and torches being a source of light as the sky was completely dark. Some of the brothers were holding the fat man down as he was being nailed to a thick log while screaming in agony. Bjorn tore open the back of the king's shirt as Ivar gained a predatory look as he watched from where he was seated in front of the king.

Bjorn then pulled a knife from one of the fires and stabbed it into the man's back before cutting downward along his spine. The king was screaming all the while and Ragnar's oldest son then tore the skin away from the man's spine before Ubbe handed Bjorn his axe. Now it was time to cut the king's ribs one by one and Ivar got closer to see the agony on the fat man's face.

Blood was flying with every swing of the axe even after the man died from the pain and Floki sent up a short prayer to the gods. As morning came, the Blood Eagle was strung up between two trees on display over where Ragnar had died.


	9. Irreparable Damages

The makeshift war camp that had been quickly put together to shelter the vast army was bustling as I sat on a stool while sharpening my sword by a pit where a goat was being cooked. Sigurd was cutting out the meat not worth eating as Floki came over and poured himself a drink.

"It seems to me that the Saxons are as timid as frightened women. Their hearts are faint. I don't think they can truly trouble us." Ivar smiled before eating some meat.

"You don't know enough, Ivar." Bjorn spoke up. "You haven't seen enough. These are brave men. I've fought against them, you haven't."

"I can only see what my eyes tell me, Bjorn. And what I see is frightened people running before us."

"I mean, have you seen your face, Ivar? Hideous. Gives even me nightmares." I popped off and some of the people around the fire laughed.

"You're just jealous of my beauty, you pale snowflake."

"You look like a donkey's arse, I am jealous of nothing." I smirked and Ivar threw some bits of meat at me. "Child."

"Skeleton."

"For once, why don't you just listen to an older, wiser brother? These people who are running away, they're not warriors. They are not the ones who will stay and fight to defend this kingdom." Ubbe handed a cup to Ivar.

"And protect their honor." Sigurd added. "For what is a warrior without his honor?"

"Or her." I piped up.

"Or her." Sigurd nodded.

"I don't know. You tell me, brother. And, tell me again, how many battles have you fought?" Ivar chuckled.

"Same as you, brother, except I don't ride around in a comfortable bloody chariot!"

"What you have to learn, Ivar, is that if you break up this brotherhood, we shall not succeed." Bjorn stated. "We have many challenges ahead of us. So, if you want to keep arguing and whining like a little girl, then I suggest you leave. We don't need you." I stopped sharpening my sword and looked at Bjorn.

"Oh, but you _do_ need me. Why do you think father chose me to come with him to England? He had a reason for doing so. He told me I was the one who would act for him, who would make sure he was revenged." Ivar glanced at his brothers and the eldest held up a deer's head in front of his face.

"If that's what you want to think, then think it." Bjorn mocked and the men laughed.

"I understand it must be hard for you to accept that the true heir to the great Ragnar Lothbrok should turn out to be a cripple and a reject." Ivar glanced at his legs and Ubbe spit.

"So _this_ is what the grunting of the little pigs was about." Floki spoke up from where he sat after chuckling, and the brothers all looked at him. "Don't forget to eat, Hel." My father gestured to me with his cup before getting up and leaving.

~

"Halt!" A man shouted as we were walking along a muddy road and an old man on a smokey horse road up. It was the scout that had been sent ahead and the brothers went to speak with him to learn what he had. They didn't talk long and Bjorn turns to the army and whistles while waving his hands. A horn was blown as people were shouting to pass the message along to the mass of people.

"Make camp!"

"Make camp here!"

"You can make camp. I want to take a look at where we're going to fight." Ivar told his brothers.

"What are you talking about?"

"They will expect us to fight in a certain way. Why should we do that? Why don't we plan to fight in a different way, and surprise them?"

"Our warriors won't understand what's happening." Hvitserk answered. "We fight in the shield wall. That's how we fight."

"But we have a bigger army. And they have a bigger army, now, Hvitserk. We cannot fight in the same way."

"I would have to agree with him." I piped up while watching the army move from the road to the clearing in the trees to set up camp. "Victory comes not to those that have brute strength alone but to those that learn and change as the battle does."

"It's too late to change now." Sigurd shook his head.

"Who are you to say that?"

"Shut your mouth." Bjorn looked at Ivar. "We are brothers. Together! Why do you want to change the tactics?"

"Do you want to win, brother?" Ivar questioned. "It's like Hel said. Listen, come with me, Bjorn. Let's investigate the battlefield. Perhaps, instead of a narrow and small place, we should stretch the battlefield across a large area, many miles. And use the landscape. Ditches, hills, woods. What do you say?"

"If it works, it is a good plan. If it doesn't, then it is a bad plan." Bjorn stated before hopping onto the smokey horse the old man from before had been riding. He turned the beast around and looked to his younger brother. "What are you waiting for?" And the two of them urged their horses forward.

Clicking my tongue, I waved my hand to Ivar and Garmr ran to catch up and jumped into Ivar's chariot. The blue eyed man looked back at me and I simply smiled and waved.

"Did you just send your wolf with Ivar?" Ubbe questioned.

"You know your brother gets into trouble a lot. The idiot." I sighed while putting my hands onto my hips. The three of them chuckled and we walked to where the camp was already being built.

~

Standing on the hill, another English army faced us from a lower elevation. There was more of them this time, but we still outnumbered them from the looks of it. We all backed off and split, leading the Saxons to where _our_ battlefield was.

Running through the woods behind Garmr, I pulled the bow from my back and joined the men and women lining the tree line to shoot at the army running past. Drawing back the arrow, I shot and took down one of the Saxons. We were all shooting at the men that had been baited by a smaller group of vikings and each arrow I shot took a man down in one way or another. They tried to build a wall with their shields, but their formation was weak and full of holes. We stopped shooting and fell back at Bjorn's command.

There were four horn blows and the sectioned off Englishmen went to chase the vikings on the hill. I snorted while watching them through the trees. _'The idiots.'_ I thought before running to get to the next position. It was merely a waiting game now, and I smirked when I heard the horses coming up the road we were on either side of.

Garmr held my quiver as I shot men off of their horses and arrows fell like rain simply because of how many of us there were. Ivar's plan had worked like the mad genius he was. The foot soldiers were futilely trying to cover themselves with their shields and like before it was a weak defense as they lacked the unity a viking shield wall had. They tried to escape, but those from the fields funneled in on the sides the archers were not and the Saxons where now trapped.

Dropping our bows, the archers picked up swords, axes, and shields to join the clashing people. I ran into the fray and Garmr bolted, snarling and growling and attacking those that were clearly the enemy. I don't know how he ever knew the difference, whether it be the different colors or the different armor or whatever, but he just knew who to not attack and whose throat to rip out.

Ramming my shield into a Saxon, I knocked him down into the mud before impaling him with my sword. Spinning on my heel as I pulled my sword free of the corpse, I swung it in a horizontal arch to cut another man's head clean off. Switching my shield to my back, I grabbed my axe and buried it into a man's leg and tore him from a horse's back. He screamed in pain until I cut open his throat and blood sprayed out.

The more I fought, the more my boots and legs got covering in mud and the rest of me got covering in blood. A Saxon tried to cut my head off, but I ducked and brought my axe up between his spread legs, burying the sharp edge into his crotch before grunting and yanking it further up to his chest as his guts spilled out into the mud. I could hear a man shouting for retreat and the surviving Saxons ran and stumbled over the bodies of the fallen to escape.

The vikings still standing, which was most of us, threw up our hands and cheered with thunderous and echoing roars of victory. Among the noise I heard a wolf howl and I howled in return before seeing my blood covered wolf come running at me. His fur was in clumps and stained red, most of it being human save for where a bit of his ear was now missing.

"Good boy!" I grinned and his tail wagged as he knew he had done a good job. He licked my hand before running past me and I turned to see him going to get praise from Ivar as well. "Oh, you turd." I chuckled, running after him and jumping into the man's chariot. "Ivar, you're too clean in this fancy cart of yours! Let us fix that."

"No! No, no! Ugh!" He cringed as Garmr and I both rubbed all over him, smearing him with blood and mud. "Get off of me, you vile woman!" I smeared blood onto his cheek with my own while laughing, streaking mud through his hair with my hands as the wolf was covering him in paw prints.

"Hel! Garmr! Leave the poor cripple alone." I looked up to see Floki waving his hand at us.

"But, Father, we're only sharing the filth of victory. Look, he likes it." I snorted, forcing Ivar to smile with my dirty fingers. The man then bit my finger, making me yelp before he spit, tasting the earth and bodily fluids on my hands. Those that were around us laughed.

"You're disgusting."

"Says the one that just put that filth in his mouth willingly." I popped off, and after the men still shouting and cheering in the field had finally calmed, we regrouped and marched to the town nearest here.

"Skol!" Bjorn shouted and we charged at the walls guarding the town and the ram burst right through the gates. I recognized the place to be where Ivar, Ragnar, and I had been held, so I was somewhat familiar with a bit of its layout. However, the roaring of the army died down as we saw the streets were barren of life. A small faction of men went ahead to make sure it wasn't a trap, but they soon returned to declare that the entire place was empty and free to be raided.

Kicking down a door, Garmr trotted into the house I had broken into and I looked around. I never really took much during raids, just coins or valuables I could easily carry to sell or anything else that caught my eye.

Calmly walking through the house, I let my eyes wander as my hands flipped things over and opened containers to search through. I found some money in a box hidden in a drawer, and in a cabinet in a locked trunk I had broken open I found a shiny, silver necklace.

"Garmr." I called out and the wolf came into the room I was in. Kneeling in front of the dirty animal, I slid the necklace over his large head and smiled while admiring it on him. "Perfect. Let's see what else we can find you. Fancy a bracelet?" I questioned and he huffed. "Mm, fine. An earring to cover that hole in your ear?" Digging through the busted open trunk, I found some nice dresses that I tossed over my shoulder and some more jewelry I could exchange for money or perhaps a new axe.

Moving on to the next house, I found nothing but took their bread and ate it as I walked past the pile of things being burned by some vikings. I found an apple and some dried meat that I gave to Garmr in another house and some more coins.

King Ecbert had been found and was now hanging in a cage in a hall as the brothers sat around him from below. I had walked in on them while I was wandering around and the old man was the first to notice me after seeing Garmr trot in with the shiny necklace still on him.

"We have to decide what to do with King Ecbert." Bjorn declared.

"I don't understand. What is there to discuss? We Blood Eagle him." Ivar waved his hand. "Ecbert is as guilty as Aelle so we should do the same thing to him. I've told you this too many times, brothers. I was here! I saw Ecbert hand father over to King Aelle."

"We all understand those feelings, Ivar. _No_ _one_ is denying what you are saying." Bjorn rose his voice. "But sometimes- _sometimes_ \- we have to consider things beyond our feelings, and think what is best for our _people._ "

"I know what our people want, Bjorn. And they want what I want." Ivar raised a hand to Ecbert.

"We have to consider our position of strength." Bjorn pointed at the ground while standing in front of his youngest brother. "And use _that_....to our ultimate advantage!"

"You always like to complicate things, Bjorn. You think it makes you look clever." Ivar then glanced at me as I was biting into my apple and waved his hand. "Why not get an outside opinion on this then, from someone who is _not_ a child of Ragnar." They all looked at me as the apple gave a crisp crunch.

Pausing, I glanced at each of the men before cheeking the bite of fruit.

"Don't you drag me into this family drama of yours. I had to deal with enough of it with you and your father, Ivar."

"Then why are you in here?"

"Didn't know you all were in here. Now I want to watch what happens to the old fart." I replied, leaning onto the edge of a table and crossing my legs at my ankles.

"So, what if we kill Ecbert, Ivar? Huh? What then?" Ubbe spoke up.

"Well, then he's dead, Ubbe!"

"We are in the middle of an enemy kingdom. How long will it be before the Saxon forces gather up another army and drives us away?" Bjorn yelled.

"Exactly! So we Blood Eagle Ecbert and then we move on. We raid this entire land so that they never have a chance to assemble another army again." Ivar waved his hands and his older brother sighed while pinching the bridge of his nose. "Why would we even want to stay here?"

"It is what our father wanted." Hvitserk popped off.

"He didn't just want to win battles." Ubbe added. "He wanted land here. He wanted to make settlements so our people could live and they could work."

"Mmm. And we all know what happened."

"Yes, but in those days he did not hold a king ransom, nor did he have a great army. We do." Hvitserk twirled his sword.

"What about you, Sigurd? You've been very quiet so far." Ivar glanced to the blond leaning on a column. "I'm sure you have an opinion."

"I agree with you, Ivar."

"Excuse me?"

"We should Blood Eagle him."

"Finally, thank you."

"But I'm not sure. I'm not sure what they're saying."

"What I am saying is that we should do what our father always wanted." Bjorn stated and Ecbert rattled his chains. "Yes?"

"I'd like to speak. Well, I understand most of what you say, and I speak a little of your language now." The old man sighed. "I loved your father. He was my friend. And I know that, more than anything, he wanted to build a farming community here."

"And you killed the settlers." Ivar snapped.

"Yes. It's true. I did. But," He laughed while looking at his shackles. "now the tables have turned. We can make a new deal."

"What are you proposing?"

"Well, as you say, it's only a matter of time before you are driven away from here. Without any legal right to English lands, you have no hope of staying. Well....I am king of kings. And I can give you that legal right. I will give you legal claim to the kingdom of East Anglia. It's a large kingdom. Because I am king, no one can question that claim. And it seems that....you have enough men to enforce it until it holds. That's my offer. You should consider it."

"What do you want in return?" Ubbe questioned.

"I'll only tell you that once you agree to my proposal."

"The old man has gotten a bit smarter, I think." I piped up before biting into my apple.

~

Sitting next to my father in utter silence in the wrecked church, I was rubbing circles into his back to comfort him. It was only after everything that I had finally found him and learned the Tanaruz had killed Helga and then herself. Helga had already been buried by a tree outside of town and Garmr was laying at our feet.

Floki was just staring at the floor and I could understand his grief. He had lost his second child, his best friend, and now his wife. I was the last family he had left and we had only known each other a few months.

Leaning back to rest on the wall, I looked to the ceiling and began to tap my foot.

" _~Who shall sing me into the death-sleep sling me, when I walk on the Path of Death and the tracks I tread are cold, so cold?~_ " I softly sang. " _~I sound the songs, I sent the songs, when the deepest well gave me the drops so touched of Death-fathers wager. I know it all, Odin, where you hid your eye. Who shall sing me into the death-sleep sling me, when I walk on the Path of Death and the tracks I tread are cold, so cold?~_ "

My father hung his head while sniffling.

" _~Early in the day's end, still the raven knows if I fall. When you stand by the Gate of Death and you have to tear free, I shall follow you across the Resounding Bridge with my song. You will be free from the bonds that bind you! You are free from the bonds that bound you!~_ " My voice echoed in the Christian church, covering the sound of Floki crying into his hands.

~

The center of town had been set up for a feast to accommodate all of the vikings while the brothers sat at a raised up table. Drinking while sitting across from some stranger with facial tattoos, I looked over my shoulder after a horn was blown and saw Bjorn standing.

"Friends!" He raised his glass. "No one will ever be able to doubt what we have achieved! An army of all our peoples, and we have defeated not one, but _two_ English kingdoms!" The crowd cheered. "For us," Bjorn waved to his brothers. "the sons of Ragnar, our first duty was to avenge our father's death. And that we have done. But also, we have achieved my father's dream. We have the legal right to the land, and to farm here!" There was more cheering. "It is up to all of you to use this opportunity to send over new settlers and young families! Unfortunately, I will not be here to see this new settlement grow and thrive. My fate will take me elsewhere. I always knew I had to return to explore the Mediterranean Sea. And now I feel free to follow my destiny. But, my brothers will be here for you." He raised his cup again. "Skol."

"Skol!" They cheered.

"I will be here, but not to settle down and plow!" Ivar spoke up after Bjorn sat. "Who wants to be a farmer now? Hmm? We have a great army and we should use it. There are many other places that I want to attack and raid! And those of you who feel like I do, you should come with me. And those of you who don't, ask yourself, 'Who can stand in our way now?'" He asked and people cheered. I watched as Ivar turned to his brothers to discuss something I couldn't hear until the youngest brother turned to the army again.

"Who among you will follow me? Who will follow me into battle? For the love of fame and for the love of Odin, our All Father?" Men thrust their cups into the air and roared their acceptance.

"That idiot." I huffed, rolling my eyes and turning back to my plate.

"....I wouldn't even piss down your throat if your lungs were on fire." Ivar rose his voice so that he could be heard and people laughed.

"Well, maybe that's because you're not really a man! Are you, ' _Boneless_ '?" Sigurd retorted and the crowd murmured. _'The fuck does that mean?'_ I thought while while ripping a chunk from the cooked venison on my plate before pausing just before I popped it into my mouth. _'....Wait....is he saying Ivar's a virgin? Oh, well, that's not so surprising when he scares the piss out of people.'_ I shook my head and went back to eating.

"So, who is going to stay and farm?" Bjorn asked and a king stood up. 

"I would like to stay. But, I have other plans."

"Skol."

"Skol!"

"As for me, I want to go with Bjorn. I want to see the Mediterranean."

"Then it seems," Bjorn jumped over the table. "the only thing that really kept the sons of Ragnar together was the death of their father." He went to hug the man that had declared wanting to join him.

"Poor Bjorn! It is _you_ who doesn't want to keep the army together. It is _you_ who wants to go away to sunny places. Everyone else can follow me." Ivar declared.

"I do not want to follow you, Ivar." Sigurd hit the table with his hand while standing. "You are _crazy_. You have the mind of a child!"

"And all you do is play music, Sigurd!"

"I'm just as much a son of Ragnar as you are." Sigurd took a drink.

"I'm not sure. As far as I remember, Ragnar didn't play the oud. And he certainly didn't offer his arse to other men!" Ivar snapped and the crowd laughed.

"You make me laugh. Just like you do when you crawl around like a _baby_." Sigurd placed his hands onto the table.

"Shut your mouth!" Ivar was getting pissed and I set my cup down while straddling the bench I sat on.

"Enough!" Bjorn yelled.

"This has nothing to do with you!" Ivar shouted.

"What's the matter, Ivar? You can't take it?"

"Ivar, do not listen to him." Ubbe spoke up.

"No, I guess it must be hard for you now that your mommy's dead. Knowing she's the only one who _ever_ really loved you." Sigurd picked up his glass to take another drink and I saw the rage in the youngest brother's eyes as his hand shot for his axe.

"Ivar!" I shouted, jumping from my seat and Ubbe saw what I had and tried to intervene.

"Ivar!" But it was too late and the axe was thrown across the table. Blood soaked Sigurd's shirt around where the weapon was embedded just beneath his ribs as he stumbled. The blond looked to be in shock while he yanked the axe out and unsteady made his way to Ivar while raising the axe. Blood was now staining his pants, but he fell dead before even reaching his little brother. Ivar seemed to realize what he had done as he no longer was blinded by fury and clenched his jaw as his other brothers were at Sigurd's side.


	10. Donkey's Arse

It was a solemn funeral for Sigurd as he was in a boat adorned with furs and surrounded by his weapons. Everyone was giving Ivar dirty looks as he was looking at his dead brother with silent tears. Ivar's anger had gotten the better of him yet again, and his eyes were filled with regret, guilt, and sorrow. He could not take back what he had done no matter what he tried- he had killed his own brother.

~

"I am truly sorry." I heard Ivar saying as I leaned into the tent he was talking to his brothers in. They looked at me as I glanced only at the youngest brother.

"If you are done here, Ivar, I'd like you to come with me." I said softly and Ivar grabbed his helmet before climbing down from his chair and crawling out of the tent.

"What do you want, Hel?"

"Why does it seem as if I know you better than your own brothers?" I questioned while walking away from the mass of tents.

"Ever think it's because you do? Why are you asking this?"

"Because I know you didn't mean to do it." I glanced down at the man and saw him looking at me. "You have a beast in you, Ivar, and you have yet learned to control it. You get angered and you lose your senses. I understand that." Turning my gaze back to the land ahead of me, I stopped walking. "I know what it's like to be so isolated because of how you are and to be blinded by anger. Ivar, what you did was wrong, there's no fixing that and there are no excuses. However, I will not hold it against you." I knelt down and put my hand onto his shoulder. "Your own guilt is enough punishment." Ivar may act like a man full of pride, but he was more critical of himself than anyone else here.

We were both quiet while simply looking over the landscape, listening to the birds and bugs. Bringing him out here was both a move to get him away from all of the hateful stares and a way to let him think. The mind was a powerful thing- Ivar's incredibly so- in both knowledge and inner torment.

~

I jolted awake in the middle of the night, grabbing my knife on a reflex as I heard movement in my tent.

"Hel...." I heard sniffling and my eyes took a second to adjust to the dark.

"Ivar?" I furrowed my brows, rubbing my eyes with the butts of my palms after dropping my knife. "What is it?"

"I'm so alone." Looking at Ivar as he sat next to my pallet, tears were streaking down his cheeks. "Floki is leaving and without him, I'm...." He trailed off and I sat up.

"Did you have a nightmare, Ivar? What are you talking about?"

"He's building a boat, Hel. He's leaving now that Helga's gone. He said we didn't need him anymore and that he was letting the gods carve his path." The blue eyed man explained while sniffling and I had the urge to run out of the tent to go and see if this was true, but I didn't have to because of the state Ivar was in.

"Ivar, you're not alone." I placed my hand onto his upper back. "Garmr and I are still here for you."

"A wolf and a freakish woman." He scoffed.

"Don't be mean." I popped him upside the head before scooting over and sighing. "Come here."

"What?"

"You heard me. Come here." I pat the now empty space on the pallet while looking at him. "Don't give me that look, I'd do the same if you were a woman. I'm not going to kick a friend in need out of my tent, but I am very tired and it's late." Ivar seemed hesitant before wiping his face and crawling under the blanket of furs I had. Clicking my tongue, I called Garmr and the large wolf plopped down right between us, nuzzling the blue eyes man and licking his tears away.

"....Hel-"

"Shh. Sleep, Ivar. If you have more to say, wait til morning. It's sleep time."

"Old woman." He scoffed.

"Donkey's arse."

~

Waking up, I sighed and sat up, looking to my side to see Ivar still fast asleep with his arm draped over Garmr. The man looked rather at peace as he slept and I brushed some of his hair out of his face.

"Such a fool, you are." I mumbled. "Still so much like a child." Without even thinking, I traced my finger over his cheek and he didn't even stir. Getting up, Garmr raised his head to look at me. "Stay." I told him and moved around my tent to get dressed and strap my sword to my waist.

Leaving my tent, I popped my back and went to find breakfast. Going to the nearest fire where a goat was roasting, I grabbed a plate and piled it high with meat, bread, and some fruit. Seeing a man just finishing pouring his drink, I took the pitcher from him and walked away.

"Thank you!" I called over my shoulder and went back to my tent. Standing by the pallet, I put my foot onto Ivar's side and shook him awake. "Ivar, if you want to eat, wake up." And I chuckled as he groaned and swatted at me as if I were an annoying fly. "Ivar, the Saxons are here!" I rose my voice and he quickly rolled over while looking around. "Joking."

"You're horrible." He fell back while sighing and glanced at me with those stunning blue eyes. For a moment I was entranced by them- for such a fear inspiring man, his eyes were absolutely beautiful. I could look at them for hours. "Hel? Food?" Shaking my head, I plopped down as he sat up again and put the plate on the ground between us. I grabbed a portion of the meat and gave it to Garmr while putting the pitcher next to the food.

"So what was it that you were trying to tell me last night?" I asked while tearing apart some bread. He took some of the fruit, but didn't answer. "Ivar?"I remembered how he had come in crying last night and that told me quite a bit on it's own, but it didn't tell me everything.

"It's nothing, now. I have forgotten." He replied and I looked at him as his gaze was on the fruit in his hands.

"If you remember and ever wish to talk about it, just say so." I stuffed some of the meat into the torn apart bread and bit into it. "We are friends Ivar, and my loyalty is strong. You can tell me anything without fear, you should know that by now."

"....Thank you, Hel."

"Don't thank me, I will still punch you if I need to." I popped off and his serious expression cracked as he softly laughed. I knew he had lied when he said he had forgotten, but the man had many barriers around himself and I wasn't going to force my way through them. I wanted Ivar to let me in of his own accord, and if he did not feel comfortable telling me something, I would simply wait until he did.

I knew how a person like him was. Fuck, I used to be just like him until I learned to control my anger. It was difficult, it was painful, but I had done it. However, I hadn't done it alone- it was impossible to do alone.

~

"You were planning to leave without telling us, Floki, huh?" Ubbe questioned as he neared the river shore were I was helping my father load his boat. He originally hadn't wanted me to know about his leaving until he was gone, but we talked and I let him know that I was fine with his decision. I mean, yes, I would miss him and was a bit upset, but this was his choice.

"I wanted to spare you the trouble of trying to stop me."

"But we will anyway."

"And you can't." Floki sighed while carrying the raven in a cage onto the boat. "So let us just say farewell properly instead." My father then walked over to them as I tied down a crate of food.

"Where are you going?" Hvitserk asked.

"Wherever the gods will take me. But as long as I live and breathe, you, the sons of Ragnar Lothbrok, will always be close to my heart."

"Farewell, Floki." Ubbe said as the older man grabbed the back of his neck and put their foreheads together. "You are the greatest boat builder of all time.

"Farewell, Floki." Hvitserk grabbed him in a hug as I walked over. "Beloved by the gods."

"You knock-kneed fool." Ivar shook his head. "Stay. We need you just as much as our father needed you, but instead you choose to run away, you coward."

"Stand up and say that to my face." Floki popped off, making Ivar give a soft smile. "She may not be a boat-builder, but my daughter can keep you boys in line in my place." Floki clapped a hand onto my shoulder.

"Oh, what a burden to pass on to me." I chuckled and my father gave me a tight hug. "We may not have known each other for very long, Father, but it was an honor to fight at your side. Don't forget about me, you old fool."

"Never." He shook his head while touching my cheek before he grabbed the last burlap sack to carry onto the boat. I waved as he pushed off the bank and began to row down the river. Vikings from the camp lined the water to bid the man farewell while chanting and banging on their shields.

~

I was walking with Garmr through the woods with a string of rabbits slung over my shoulder, enjoying the scenery before I'd head back to camp and add the rabbits to the food supply. Going over a hill after Garmr had suddenly picked up speed, I saw the Ragnar brothers, save for Bjorn, around two Saxon children and the wolf was at Ivar's side to be pet.

My brows furrowed since I didn't know why they had the kids, but I continued forward and heard Ivar speaking their language rather well.

"Since when did you learn their tongue, Ivar?" I questioned, bringing attention to myself. The man got a cocky grin and was about to reply, but the children gasped and started saying something while pointing at me. Quirking up an eyebrow, I glanced from them to Ivar as he was listening to them. "....What are they saying?" The youngest brother laughed. "Ivar, what are they saying?"

"They think you to be an ' _angel_ ', Hel." He answered and the other brothers laughed as well.

"Angel?"

"They are like warriors to their god, in a way similar to our valkyries, but much less." Oh, now I was intrigued. I set down the rabbits and stepped down from the small hill to crouch in front of the children. They looked to be around 10 or so, and they were looking at me with such awe I had never seen before.

"Why do they think me to be an angel?" I asked and Ivar turned to them and translated. Their mouths moved to form words I didn't understand and the man next to me tilted his head.

"Your purity. They believe someone that looks like you could be nothing less than an angel."

"....Is that because of all the white they associate with their god?"

"Probably." Ivar chuckled and ruffled one kid's hair while saying something in their tongue.

"Hmm...." I hummed, getting back to my feet and picking up the rabbits. "An angel?" Mumbling, I turned to return to my walk and let Garmr remain with Ivar.

Three days later, we were attacking the town of York where we would take root to have a defendable position to keep the army. The townspeople were running and screaming, but the soldiers were trying to fight back until they were easily cut down by sheer force and our numbers.

There weren't actually that many people in the streets, however, because of them all being in the church. I simply walked into the church being taken over by shouting vikings and looked around. After what those children had said, I was now more curious of their religion. I wasn't in any way believing in their god and what not, my gods were real unlike theirs.

Going to the front of the church and ignoring the screams behind me, I looked up to the large cross sat on a table. It was made from what looked to be gold and had many precious stones laid into it. This cross was a well known symbol of their faith, but what it's meaning held to them I did not know.

Someone fell at my side, a gash on their forehead that they would more than likely survive from and I grabbed them off of the ground and pointed to the cross.

"What does it mean?" I asked, but they hadn't a clue as to what I was saying. Grabbing their chin, I made the young man look at the golden figure and he began to stammer in his native tongue. Rolling my eyes, I sighed and threw him behind me and back into the fray of chaos. Why did I think asking him would be helpful?

Rolling my shoulders, I left the church and went to find more soldiers to fight if there were any left in the streets.

~

Fiddling with some straw as I strolled down the cobbled streets, I observed the work being done to fortify the walls. I was looking for Ivar and found him leaning over a table as a man covered in tattoos was tapping ink into his upper back. It was hard to see what the design was from the blood and loose ink, and I plucked up the cup in front of him and took a drink from his ale.

"Getting a tattoo now, huh?" I questioned.

"Stealing my drink now, huh?" He quirked up a brow and I slightly tilted my head as my eyes ran over his exposed arms and torso. I would be lying if I said I did not like what I saw.

"For a donkey face, you have rather nice breasts." I gestured with the cup in my hand.

"I do _not_ have breasts."

"Then what are those?" I flicked the straw in my hand at his chest and chuckled as he rolled his eyes. "I see the fortifications are going well. Have you and your brothers made any more plans concerning the army or what not?" I plopped down on a stool by the table, still drinking his drink as Garmr was sniffing at Ivar.

"Not yet. Our focus is still on the walls."

"Mm." My eyes drifted to the older man tapping away at the younger male's back. Almost the entirety of his exposed arms were covered in faded ink, so I assumed he was familiar with what he was doing. "So what are you getting?"

"I can show you when it's done." Ivar gave a mischievous grin and I quirked up a brow.

"Why not tell me now?"

"To watch you suffer your own curiosity."

"Turd." I popped off before taking a drink. "When was the last time you washed? You smell worse than a rotting donkey arse."

"I think you are smelling your own breath, my friend."

"I doubt it. You are covered in filth."

"What, are you my mother?"

"No, but I do not want to smell you even from this distance. How do you think that poor man feels having to stand there while giving you your tattoo?" I asked and the old man snorted. Ivar clenched his jaw and gave me a look.

"Fine. I'll wash. But only because you're being so _annoying_."

"Good." I smirked. "Now all of our noses shall be spared."

"Oh, my- Go away, Hel."

"Never. You are stuck with me now, cripple. My father gave me a duty and I shall fulfill it." Ivar started to laugh while shaking his head.

~

"Ivar, what in Odin's name are you doing?" I asked, stopping by the blacksmith after hearing him grunting and shouting. I had been walking with his brothers, carrying some rabbits we had caught, and from where I stood I could only see the top half of Ivar as he was laying on the ground while I hearing a metallic banging.

"Yes, what _are_ you doing?" Hvitserk leaned onto a wooden beam holding up the roof.

"Wait and I'll show you." Ivar waved his hand. There were a few more bangs and a blacksmith popped up.

"Ready." And Ivar took a breath before sitting up and disappearing from my view. Ubbe and I exchanged looked before seeing Ivar swing his legs around. There was metal covering them and he grabbed a single crutch similar to the ones he lost in England. Ivar used the crutch and the edge of a table to hoist himself up with a grunt and turned. His weight was now on the crutch and his legs and he seemed a bit unsteady.

I honestly thought he was going to fall again, but he was actually managing to walk towards us. When he reached his brothers and I, he stood up straighter with a look on his face I couldn't quite read, but he had a small smile. There was a look of victory in his eyes and I felt relieved he hadn't fallen again.

Ivar was actually taller than both Hvitserk and I, and the same height as Ubbe.

"Can I say how strange it is to have to look _up_ at you?" I asked and Ivar pat my head.

"Can I say how you are much smaller than I thought? Look at you, so little." He laughed when I swatted his hand off of my head.


	11. "I am Ivar the Boneless!"

"I hope you are comfy in that fancy chair, Ivar." I said while standing in front of him with my hands on my hips. His elbows were on the armrests while one hand was on his chin as his brow rose.

"Why?"

"Because I have some questions for you."

"Such as?" He shifted in his seat as I walked closer and let my eyes wander over the room being lit by candles.

"These Saxons, you know of their beliefs, do you not?"

"I know enough. Why?"

"Tell me about it." Turning, I sat next to his chair and pat my thigh to have Garmr lay beside me. "I wish to understand it."

"Why would you want to understand a false religion? Their god is weak and feeble, nothing more."

"I want to know why those children were not afraid of me." I replied while petting the wolf's head. "You are smart and know these people better than I do, so that is why I came to you. They looked at me with wonder rather than fear- What is it about these angels? Are they that grand?"

"....To them. Have you seen the glass windows in the churches? The people with wings?"

"Yes."

"Those are angels. They are messengers, warriors, whatever their god needs them to be. The Christians believe these things are without ' _sin_ ' and are the holiest beings second only to their god. They are without flaw." Ivar calmly explained before sighing.

"Well, that's rather boring, don't you think?" I furrowed my brows while scratching behind Garmr's ear.

"What do you mean?"

"To be without flaw is to be perfection. Our gods are without perfection and they are wondrous. To be flawed is to be different, and to be different is interesting." I answered. "Look at you, for example. You are far from perfection with your anger, unpredictability, and even the fact that you are a cripple, but you are interesting. Complex. There is never a dull moment with you, Ivar." There was a quiet pause before he spoke again.

"I would say the same of you, Hel."

"Mm. Now teach me their language." I grinned after hearing his heavy sigh.

~

"That's him." Ivar stated as we watching from a tower how the Saxon soldiers were climbing over the wall.

"Who?" Hvitserk asked.

"Aethelwulf, King Ecbert's son. Oh, and he brought his own sons. Like lambs to the slaughter."

"Hvitserk, Hel, let's go." Ubbe spoke up and we followed him out while leaving Ivar by the window. The sky overhead was dark and covered with grey clouds as a thick fog was settled over the town. There were traps everywhere for the Saxon warriors ranging from pits of spikes and hidden archers just waiting for something to shoot at.

Getting into position, I drew my sword when I heard the first screams. Now I only had to wait until those that made it past the traps came running by to cut them down.

Screaming and pained howls echoed through the air and I ran out when I saw the first Englishman. Garmr leapt at another soldier and ripped out his throat as I cut a man's leg clean off and impaled my sword through his skull. It was after my third kill that rain began to fall and turned the streets muddy, but that did not slow me as I fought on.

However, seeing Ivar race by on his chariot did.

"Oh, that idio-" I was cut off when I saw a sword being swung at me and I barely managed to dodge it, dropping to the ground and rolling away to regain myself. Shouting, I then lunged at the Saxon and trapped him between my shield and a stone wall before driving my sword through his torso. Blood poured from his mouth as the life left his eyes, and I kicked him off of my blade.

Running in the direction I had seen Ivar's chariot go in, I briefly panicked when I saw it crashed on the side of the road until I heard him shouting at the English army lined in front of him. Garmr was at his side, baring his teeth with raised hackles despite the rain. An arrow flew and I heard the wolf yelp before he viciously growled, ready to attack until Ivar threw one of his spikes and killed the guy that had shot.

"Don't you know who I am?!" Ivar screamed at the many men. "You can't kill me! Don't you know who I am?! I am Ivar the Boneless! I am Ivar the Boneless! You can't kill me!" He was covered in blood and the rain did little to wash it away and only smeared the red further. The army, despite being only faced by a cripple and a wolf, looked terrified and uneasy. "I am Ivar the Boneless!" My eyes darted to the side when I saw Ubbe and his men filling an alley. He looked at me with confusion and I just held up my hand while grinning.

Ivar was weakening the men mentally, whether intentionally or not, because he was doing what he seemed to do best- instill fear. Vikings came screaming behind me and I raised my shield to stop them.

"Wait!" I shouted, and Ivar finally noticed all of us there before yelling some more at the Saxons. Watching the soldiers in front of me, I observed their faces to find the perfect time to charge. A man too afraid to wield his sword right was an easy kill. Thrusting my sword into the air over my head, I gave a war cry and vikings poured into the area, surrounding the Englishmen and beating them down.

The water in the streets ran muddy and red from enemy blood being shed nearly as much as the rain itself. Garmr stayed by Ivar's side even when men on horseback rode in. When I had the chance, I switched my shield to my back and drew my axe.

My sword sent a vibration up my arm with every heavy impact it made and my axe gave a sickening thud with every body it dug into. My heart was hammering in my chest as I flew from opponent to opponent. Screaming and shouting and rain filled my ears as I cut another man's head off and his blood sprayed forth, creating an arch of red as his body fell back.

The Saxons called for a retreat and those that could escape ran for the gates. The vikings cheered with their axes, swords, and shields high in the air. Turning around, I found Ivar laughing while surrounded by bodies while his face and hands were tinted red with blood.

"You crazy bastard." I panted and laughed while standing in front of the blue eyed man. Garmr now had a nick in his other ear from the arrow, but he was overall unharmed and was licking blood off of my hand.

~

"We did well, brothers."

"We?" Ivar furrowed his brows as he walked over to lean on the table I sat at.

"Yes." Ubbe nodded. "I saved your life."

"You?" I quirked up a brow at Ubbe and he smiled.

"The men were following me, were they not?" He replied and I waved him off.

"It was all my strategy." Ivar stated. "And you know that." He grunted while swinging up his leg to sit on the table, making my drink spill a little.

"Oi!"

"We all did very well, though. Why-Why do you argue, huh?" Hvitserk asked.

"I'm not arguing."

"Good." Ubbe nodded. "The most important thing is what we do next."

"And isn't that obvious, Ubbe?"

"Yes. We have defeated the Saxons. Let's make good our claim to the land. Let's all make peace." Ubbe raised his hands.

"I have _no_ interest in peace. ' _Peace_ ' is a dirty word." Ivar glanced around and I spoke over the rim of my glass.

"So is your name, but we still must use it."

"Shut up, Hel."

"Or what? You going to fight me? Bring your best, arse face." I chuckled.

"More of our people can cross the water." Ubbe stated. "We can farm, hm? Now, it is time to negotiate."

"And that is the wrong advice, as always, Ubbe."

"So, Ivar, what do you suggest, hmm?" Hvitserk stood up and walked closer.

"The Saxons lost the battle, but they have not yet lost the war. I would beware trying to negotiate with them." Ivar told them and I stood while downing the rest of my ale.

"I'm with Ivar on this one. Now, I've got bits of Saxon in my hair and blood _everywhere_ , so I'm going to go wash." Setting the now empty cup back onto the table, I turned to leave. "Garmr, however, is probably rolling in mud as we speak." I sighed.

Walking out of the room, I called on a slave to heat up some water to fill a large basin for me. Placing the basin in the middle of the room I occupied, I undressed and tossed my clothes into a pile before kneeling on a fur rug. Dropping a rag into the hot water, I wrung it out before scrubbing my arms.

Cleaning myself from the sweat, blood, and mud, the water in the basin became murky and dirty compared to what it had been before. Leaning over, I dunked my hair in and ran my fingers through my white locks to wash it out. Sighing through my nose, I gathered up my soaked hair and wrung it out. I had no scented soaps so I smelled like fresh rain, but that was still better than rotting Saxon.

Hoisting up the basin onto my hip now that I was done cleaning myself, I went to the window and made sure no one was below before dumping it out into the muddy puddles on the street. Setting the basin down on the beaten up table, I walked to the bed covered in furs and flopped face down on it.

"It's always nice to relax after a battle." I mumble to myself, burying my face into the thick animal fur that was almost as soft as Garmr. However, the relaxing didn't last long as my head jerked up and I went rigid when I heard the door opening.

"Hel-" The man cut off as he saw me lying naked on the bed and I felt my face burn as his mouth hung open. I quickly covered myself with the blanket and snatched up the nearest thing to throw at him.

"Ivar, you wretch! Stop staring!"

"Ow! I didn't mean to! It was an accident! Stop! Ow!" He was trying to block the random things I was tossing at him, but my aim was impeccable.

"Get out!" And he finally slammed the door shut while stepping back into the hall. Falling back onto the bed, I covered my face with my hands as it felt like it was on fire.

~

"Ubbe, Hvitserk." I crossed my arms over my chest while looking at the two bruised men. "Is it true? You went to speak with the Saxons alone?" They said nothing and dropped their gazes to the ground. Sighing through my nose, I pulled up a seat and rested my elbows onto my knees while clasping my hands. "I'm not here to scold you, but I must ask why is it that neither of you listen to Ivar? He's proven how smart he is many times, aiding in our victories with his tactical plans, and yet neither of you give him the credit he deserves. Is it because he's the youngest? A cripple? He's helped keep all of us alive and you both went behind his back and nearly got yourselves killed."

"We're leaving, Hel. Ivar can have his army." Ubbe said lowly while looking up at me.

"Leaving? Are you insane?" I rose my voice while sitting up. "Something doesn't go how you planned and you run?"

"That's not what we're doing, Hel. You don't understand-"

"No, Hvitserk, _you_ don't. Ivar is just as much your equal as any brother. Yes, he is ambitious, and yes, he likes to fight, but he's smart. He knows what he's doing. He's had to learn different things from you all simply because he was always held _down_ by _all_ of you. You listened to Bjorn, Sigurd, even each other, but never Ivar."

"Yeah, well, you don't see us killing our own brothers either, do you? He's-" Ubbe fell from his chair after I had punched him and looked at me with wide eyes as he held his jaw.

"Do not use the death of Sigurd to justify your refusal to treat Ivar as your brother or to listen to what he has to say. Your pride is pitiful- that man is still your kin and fighting to keep us alive while striving for victory."

"How could you possibly know anything about-"

"Finish that sentence and I'll punch you as well, Hvitserk." I pointed at the younger of the two. "I'm not saying all of this because I am his friend, I'm saying this because I know what it's like to be in his position. You see this?" I grabbed some of my braids. "This?" I pointed to my eyes. "All of this?" Gesturing to the rest of me, my gaze went from one brother to the other and back. "I speak on behalf of Ivar because I know the struggles he has endured. Even if you don't agree with your brother, listen to him like you would have your other brothers. He deserves that much after everything." Clenching my jaw, I turned away from them. "If you want to leave so badly, I won't stop you. You are both grown men capable of making your own decisions."

And, in the end, it was only Hvitserk that decided to stay while Ubbe left with three ships to return to Kattegat.


	12. Angel Among Heathens

"So, the hunting party did not return today." Hvitserk looked nervous as he looked to his younger brother. "....I said the hunting party-"

"I heard what you said."

"We are almost out of food. The only hunter returning with meat is a wolf, and he can't nearly bring enough food to feed us all. And there is sickness in the town. What are we going to do? We have to do something." Hvitserk continued, dropping a rabbit bone bare of meat back onto his plate. "The Saxons are in their own country. They can be reinforced and grow stronger, while every day we just grow weaker-"

"What are you really saying, huh, brother? That I was wrong not to negotiate with the Saxons, and that Ubbe was right?"

"No."

"No? Are you sure?"

"Ubbe was wrong. That's why I didn't sail with him."

"But now you regret it?"

"I just told you no. Ubbe treated me like his little, faithful dog. I am no one's dog, Ivar." Hvitserk stated and his brother nodded, holding his cup near his mouth.

"Woof, woof." Ivar began to snicker and other men laughed until I gave Ivar a look.

"Stop it." My voice was flat and I took a drink while keeping eye contact with the younger Ragnar son. His face fell, and my gaze turned to the others. "All of you." And their laughter died. "This is a serious matter and should be treated as such. Ivar, don't make me regret taking your side against your brothers. You are _equals_."

"We are _not_ equals."

"You _are_." I calmly set down my cup. "You are his equal as he is yours, just because you lead an army does not mean you can treat him any less. I will not be made a fool if you become blinded by power....because then Ubbe gets to punch me." I mumbled the last part and Ivar's upset expression changed to confusion.

"What?"

"Hel," Hvitserk cleared his throat. "Hel punched Ubbe while defending you to us." He scratched his head while dropping his gaze and I watched as Ivar's brows rose on his forehead.

"You punched Ubbe?"

"Yes, so stop being a prick so that my reasons for doing so remain justified."

"I am not beind a-"

"You are, Ivar. Now, as your friend, I suggest you think about how to deal with these issues concerning your sick and hungry army rather than belittling your older brother." There was silence in the hall and I continued to eat while Garmr slept at my feet.

~

"I don't understand." Hvitserk said while looking around.

"What is it that you do not understand, Hvitserk?"

"I don't understand why you _pretend_ to burn the bodies of our dead." He stated as we were walking past people tossing things into fires.

"It's all part of my plan." Ivar sniffed.

"Ah. What plan?" The older male asked and Ivar turned on his heel.

"Did you really think that I didn't have a plan, huh? Of _course_ I have a plan. I'm a cripple, not an idiot." He turned back around and went back to walking with Garmr at his side. "I've found something out, Hvitserk. The Romans were.... _very_ clever. My plan is based upon what I have found out."

"What is it? I need to know."

"And you will know, my brother. In good time."

"Ivar, I don't find that statement very comforting. I don't like doing things blindly."

"Just trust me, Hel. You do trust me, don't you?"

"Mm, maybe." I chuckled. "But I am still wondering."

"Just wait. You will see."

~

Looking up through the grates, I could see the Saxons walking overhead. If this plan worked, then Ivar very well may be the greatest tactician ever known. This plan was crazy, but it had construct and order rather than pure chaos. Vikings filled the sewers and when Ivar gave the signal, the flooded the streets after climbing up through the grates.

Vikings armed with bows and arrows were first, shooting at the Englishmen that had been taken by surprise. There was screaming and shouting and I cut through soldiers as they came at me. One managed to cut my arm, but the wound was shallow and I cut him nearly clean in half with my sharp sword.

Running, I jumped at a soldier and took him to the ground in an alley and caved his face in with the edge of my shield, bringing it down repeatedly like a hammer on an anvil. I looked up when I heard Ivar shouting and the vikings in front of me backed away upon command, leaving a single, bloody Saxon in the middle.

"Stop fighting! Give him my horse. Give him my horse." Ivar pointed with his knife and I wiped my face with my sleeve as I got up, wondering what was going on. The Saxon dressed in black fell to his knees as Ivar continued. "He is too great a warrior to fight on foot." _'....He's acknowledging him?'_ I stepped to the side as someone brought out Ivar's horse and left it beside the Englishman kissing his sword. The Saxon then got back to his feet, looking around at the wall of vikings around him and began to laugh before turning to Ivar and giving a bow.

Ivar, the mad man, grinned and returned the gesture. The man hopped up onto the horse, nodded to Ivar, and the leader of the great army motioned for the battle to continue. _'....How strange.'_ I thought.

Simply observing the man now, I wiped more blood off of my face while wondering why Ivar had treated the Saxon with such respect. But, as I watched, I saw why. The man fought like a viking. Well, until he was overpowered and drug down from the horse and held back with swords pointed at his throat and heart.

Ivar came down from where he had been standing and people cleared for him to allow him to walk towards the Saxon. He took the man's blood soaked sword and looked it over while the Englishman stared at him.

"Heathen!" He suddenly shouted, making the vikings and Ivar laugh.

"Christian." And for a brief moment the Saxon's gaze drifted away from Ivar before clearly changing focus as his expression changed as well. Ivar, wondering what the man was looking at, turned to follow his gaze and saw that the Saxon was staring at me. The youngest Ragnar son's grin fell and he turned back to the Englishman and waved his hand in front of his face, but the man didn't stop staring.

Narrowing my eyes, I walked up to the man, passing Ivar and standing only inches away from the Saxon. I looked into his blue eyes, trying to figure out why he kept staring, but his blood covered face wasn't telling me anything.

"Christian?" Ivar snapped his fingers, but the man's gaze 'still' did not leave me.

"The Lord has sent me an angel...." He spoke lowly. "Praise be unto Him for He-" And I cut him off with a headbutt.

"I am _not_ an angel." I growled and I heard laughter as the unconscious man was taken away.

"Aw, that was mean, Hel." Ivar snickered and I shot him a look.

~

"The Saxon army, or what remains of it, has abandoned their camp and left." A man reported to Ivar before being waved off.

"If you want, we can pursue them and destroy them."

"I think we have more important things to do." Hvitserk stated. "We must look to Katteget. What if Ubbe kills Lagertha, or persuades her to crown him king? The loss of our home base would be a devastating blow. We need to sort things out." Ivar turned to fully face his brother as he spoke. "We must kill Ubbe and Lagertha, and you must be crowned king of Kattegat, before Bjorn returns."

"You are making more and more sense, my brother. Good man."

"No." I piped up and the brothers looked at me.

"No? Are you against me being king, Hel?" Ivar asked me.

"I'm not saying no to that, I don't care which of you boys is king honestly. I'm saying no to killing Ubbe."

"Hel, if we don't, he may raise forces against us."

"Brothers shouldn't kill brothers, Ivar." I said, and I saw his jaw clench. "If you wish to be king and manage to gain the crown, build an alliance Ubbe could not hope to go against. You already have all of these people following you, so you already have a start to that." Ivar leaned back in his seat while looking at me as if he were thinking, and then nodded.

"I remember also that King Herald has an ambition of invading Kattegat. In the short term we should make an alliance and work with him. This time we will truly quit York, though leaving a big enough garrison to keep it safe until our return. Hmm?"

"And what of our prisoner? The bishop."

"Well, what do you propose?"

"Well, he seems like an important man. We could offer him back to the Saxons for a great ransom." Hvitserk replied while propping his feet up.

"Or we could crucify him. That would be fun." Ivar grinned before looking at me. "Or would you have something to say against that?" My brows furrowed and I stopped petting the wolf laying in my lap.

"Why would I have something to say against what you do with your prisoner?" I questioned, seeing the brothers exchange looks before Hvitserk answered.

"Because he likes you, Hel."

"What?"

"Calls you the ' _Angel among Heathens_ '." They were both chuckling and I rolled my eyes.

"That's ridiculous. He's just as stupid as those children."

~

"Hel! Come to see your boyfriend?" Ivar looked at me as I walked up and the man chained to the ground looked over his shoulder to see me. His eyes went wide and I made a face at Ivar.

"Very funny."

"You...." The man said softly as if in surprise and my attention turned to him.

"Me." I raised my hands out at my sides before crossing them over my chest. "I came to set things straight. I am no angel, Saxon. I am a viking." The man's face twisted and he spat on the muddy ground.

"A devil in disguise."

"I was never in disguise and I am not a devil, you fool." Turning to Ivar, I pointed to the Englishman. "Why do you keep this idiot alive?"

"Why, do you want me to kill him?"

"That's not what I said."

"What's the matter, Hel?"

"I thought the matter was clear seeing as I came all the way here to get him to stop calling me an angel." I waved my hand and Ivar shrugged.

"Why do you have such a problem with it? It's not as if those things exist."

"They do." The Saxon snapped. "They are divinities created by God, our Savior."

"A false god."

"He is _not_ a false god. You _heathens_ pray to false gods."

"Our gods are not false." I stepped closer to the man and grabbed his jaw to tilt his head up. Looking into his eyes, I tilted my head to the side slightly. "Have you ever seen your god?"

"Yes." He swallowed. "He is in everything He created. He-"

"No, you idiot, I mean have you seen _him_. Because I have seen the Allfather and he was _real_." I moved my hand to his cheek. "He was actually there, touched me so and spoke to me."

"Lies conjured by the devil." The Saxon snarled and I turned away from him while laughing.

"I will admit that your beliefs baffle me. I don't understand you would pray so faithfully to a god that never answers."

"He answers, heathen, in his own way."

"Mm." I hummed. "So, what _are_ you going to do with him?" I asked while looking at Ivar. He shrugged while smiling, glancing to the Englishman before answering.

"I was thinking we bring him with us. It would be interesting, don't you think?"

"Interesting is one way to describe it." I replied.

~

During the journey to King Harald, the bishop was tied to the mast of one of the boats and it seemed he was either looking at random things or staring at me. I don't know why, but the way he looked at me bothered me. I was used to being stared at, it happened a lot with the way I looked, but this man....it was different.


	13. Sins of the Bishop

"Ivar and Hvitserk Lothbrok." The king greeted from his throne as we entered his hall. "Even Hel is with you- Why did you not return to Kattegat?"

"You don't need the Seer to know that Ubbe and I fell out. We disagreed about many things. But in the end, Hvitserk agreed with me and Ubbe sailed alone to Kattegat, and that is why we're here." Ivar explained while leaning on his crutch as he stood before the occupied thrones.

"A good choice." King Harald smiled at us. "A good choice. Surely you three remember Astrid? She's my queen now." My eyes drifted to the woman with tattoos on her neck and I recognized her as Lagertha's shieldmaiden that had always been with her.

"I am happy for both of you." Ivar chuckled.

"Oh, thank you, Ivar." Astrid nodded to the younger Ragnar son.

"So, do I understand that you and your warriors will support me when I attack Kattegat?"

"Straight to it. I like it." Ivar pointed. "Yes, we will."

"But only if Ivar is made king." Hvitserk added.

"You know that I have my own plans for that kingdom." Harald stated.

"Of course, of course. And _that_ is why we are here. What I think my dear brother is trying to say is that in the long term, what is to stop you from ruling Kattegat when I am dead and gone? How long can that be? I'm not a healthy person. I'm a cripple."

"But your brother Hvitserk?"

"All that matters to the both of us is to reclaim the kingdom that was torn from us by that murderous bitch, Lagertha. We want to be in an alliance with you, to make that happen. And soon."

"You have a prisoner. I have heard of this man. Where is he?" King Harald grinned.

"Bring the Christian." Ivar yelled over his shoulder and the bishop was brought in. "On his knees." The two on either side of the Saxon pushed him down before leaving. "Bishop Heahmund."

"What's the point of him? Why don't you just kill him?"

"Because he is a great warrior. I've seen how he fights with my own eyes. And I admire great warriors." Ivar explained while walking around the man on his knees.

"He will fight for us?"

"Maybe. If he doesn't want to get crucified."

"The Lord rules me: I shall want for nothing." Heahmund said in his native tongue before Ivar shut him up by yanking his head back by his hair.

"No, no, no. Let him continue." King Harald waved his hand and Ivar let the man go.

"And He has set me in a place of good pasture. And fed me by the water's shore. He led me over the ways of righteousness for His name. Yet I now go in the midst of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me, Lord. Your rod and Your staff have comforted me....even if the devil stands at my side." Ivar looked done and I smacked the man upside the head for calling me the devil again.

"What did he say?" King Harald asked.

"Ah, he's praying to his god." Ivar shook his head while waving his hand. "And calling Hel the devil." He then looked at me and pointed while raising his brows. "The Christians keep mistaking Hel for either an angel or the devil." King Harald and the others in the room started to laugh.

~

Garmr didn't really seem to like Harald's kingdom so far, shaking his paws after every step since the streets were muddy from water and thrown out fish guts. It didn't smell too nice either, and seagulls filled the air.

Walking down the main street, I was stopped by King Harald as he was smiling at me.

"What?"

"You know, I never really thought much of you in England, but now....now you have my interest." He answered honestly while glancing around and stepping closer.

"And why is that, King Harald?" I tilted my head and observed his tattooed face.

"Many reasons. I hear you are the only one Ivar will listen to."

"I've earned his respect and trust and he has mine in return." I nodded. "Ivar will listen to anyone who has those things, honestly."

"Mm, but that doesn't seem very easily had."

"For good reason. So, why have you stopped me? Surely you have other things to attend to as a king."

"I think it best to get to know my allies." Harald chuckled, crossing his arms as he shifted on his feet. "I asked Hvitserk about you, but he seems to hardly know a thing other than you are Floki's daughter and a formidable warrior. That, and you are a loyal friend to Ivar."

"Well, King Harald, what is it that you wish to know?"

~

I drug a chair behind me and set it in front of the bishop that was chained to the ground. Garmr sniffed at the man before trotting over to me and laying down by the chair. I sat down and looked at the praying Saxon, crossing my arms and waiting until he dropped his hands.

He opened his eyes and looked directly at me with a face like stone stained by blood and grime. Sighing through my nose, I looked him over before speaking.

"Why is it you think me to be your devil?"

"How else would you explain the way you look? If not an angel, then surely you are the devil or his proxy." His voice was steady and calm as he spoke. "Only he would create something that would cause such temptation."

"Temptation?" I furrowed my brows, watching his jaw clench as he dropped his gaze.

"Temptation to sin." His voice was low and I saw his hands clench into fists. "You are a heathen, but your beauty is enthralling. You look to be the work of God, hence why I mistook you for one of his angels, but upon learning of _what_ you are it became clear that you were not and that I was mistaken." My head fell back with laughter.

"The holy man isn't so ' _holy_ ', is he? You find me beautiful, bishop? A heathen viking?" I questioned before leaning forward and resting my elbows onto my knees while pointing at him. "Is that why you continue to stare at me?" Heahmund didn't answer and I stood to get closer. Crouching, I was less than a foot away from him and his stoic expression seemed to falter as I leaned my face closer to his.

As he had said, he seemed enthralled while looking into my eyes. The look on his face seemed somewhat familiar, but I couldn't quite place it as I cocked my head to the side.

"Tell me, bishop," My voice was low while I found amusement in the Saxon. "what is it exactly that I tempt you to do?" The man swallowed as his breath was uneven, and he tore his gaze away to stare straight ahead. His lips began to move as he whispered prayers, but I already had my answer without him needing to tell it. "Poor Saxon." I pat his chest and stood up before leaving.

Finding Ivar and Hvitserk, I plopped down at the table they were eating at and propped my feet up on another chair.

"Guess what I just discovered." I smiled while crossing my arms as they looked at me and paused their eating.

"That you do in fact smell worse than this town?" Ivar popped off.

"No, you idiot. I just had a nice chat with the bishop and found out why he stares and thinks me to be the devil."

"Because you're uglier than a donkey's arse?"

"Ivar, please." Hvitserk rolled his eyes while his brother chuckled.

"Fine, fine. What is the reason, Hel?" Ivar questioned and picked up his glass to take a drink.

"It seems the Saxon finds me seducing." I replied and smirked when Ivar choked on his ale and Hvitserk was coughing on his fish, beating his chest with the side of his fist.

"He _what_?!" The younger of the brothers looked at me with furrowed brows and wide eyes, wiping his mouth and chin from the ale that had splashed on him.

"Oh, poor, stupid Ivar. Let me say it simply, then. Bishop Heahmund wants to fuck me really, _really_ badly."

"How do you know that?" Hvitserk asked, looking between his brother and I. "Did he tell you?"

"Not directly. Said I was ' _beautiful'_ and a ' _temptation_ ', so surely I must be the work of the devil." I leaned over and took some meat from Ivar's plate before popping it into my mouth and getting back up. "I will admit, it's nice to know such a handsome man is lusting for me." I smirked before waving goodbye and walking off.

~

"To the overthrow of the witch, Lagertha, and to the liberation of Kattegat!" Hvitserk slurred as he thrust his ale into the air. The hall cheered and raised their own cups.

"Skol!"

"And here's to our sacred agreement." King Harald stood at the head of the table. "Which if any man, or woman," He glanced at me before continuing. "breaks, they will deserve to die." There was a quiet pause. "Skol!"

"Skol!" The vikings yelled.

" _~My mother told me, someday I would buy Galley with good oars sail to distant shores!~_ " Harald drunkenly sang as others joing in.

~

I paused my eating as a roaring crowd drug out the Saxon prisoner and threw him down into the mud. Their words were unclear with them all yelling and waving their weapons, and I rose a brow at Ivar as he set down his food. The bishop stood up and looked to the people before turning to Ivar as Hvitserk crossed his arms.

Heahmund silently walked towards the youngest Ragnar son, briefly glancing to me before turning his attention fully to the man in front of him. Ivar raised his hands to silence the crowd and they obeyed.

"Now we decide whether you'll fight with us....or whether I kill you." Ivar grabbed the knife that had been sticking out of the table and pointed it at the man, pressing the tip of the blade to the bishop's chest. "Nothing is keeping you alive but me."

"Why don't you give _me_ the knife?" Heahmund's voice was low, and Ivar cracked a grin. Turning over the knife, he held it out to the man hilt first and I felt myself grow tense as the Saxon took it. My brows furrowed, however, when he aimed the blade back at himself, glancing at me yet again before turning and walking back towards the crowd. They began to shout and yell at him again, telling him to die.

There was one man in particular that was screaming right in the bishop's face before the Saxon turned on him and buried the knife into his throat. The crowd silenced, and Heahmund spit on the vikings face before he fell dead to the muddy ground. Ivar began to laugh and clap his hands.

"I think he will fight with us!"

"Heah-mund! Heah-mund! Heah-mund!" The crowd chanted while I slipped some meat to Garmr.

Now the Saxon would be fighting with us when we attacked Kattegat in two moons' time.


	14. Freyja

"Ivar, there you are." I watched as Garmr went to greet the man walking out of a building. The moon was but a sliver short of being full and the sky was cloudy, so the only light came from torches and fires placed outside. Falling into step beside him, I sighed. "It's already almost time to sail to Kattegat."

"It is." He nodded while glancing around the mostly empty street. "Are you scared, little Hel?" The blue eyed man looked at me while smirking.

"Of course not. But it relieves me that we'll be leaving this smelly place soon." Crossing my arms, I raised my shoulders. "King Harald has been hospitable, but this place reeks of rotting fish."

"Shouldn't that smell like home to you? Stinky, little heathen." Ivar laughed as I smacked his arm with the back of my hand. I couldn't help but smile for a bit before my expression fell. "What?"

"You realize this is the first time we've been able to have a conversation by ourselves?" I asked.

"What are you talking about? We've had many talks with just the two of us. We were locked in the same room in England for days, if you're forgetting."

"No, I mean since-" I cut myself off and my eyes went wide when I realized how long it had been. "Not since you saw me _naked_. Ivar, why is that?"

"Coincidence." He quickly replied while shaking his head and I stopped his walking by placing my arm into his way, my hand on a post holding a torch to completely block him.

"No, that's not a coincidence. Ivar, have you been afraid to talk to me on your own?" I laughed as he looked down at me. "It was an accident, I'm not going to kill you for it when no one is watching."

"That's not it." He nervously shifted and averted his gaze, making my smile falter. "Just move, Hel."

"No. Now I want to know. You've been avoiding it, and I won't let you run away any longer. What is it, Ivar? Why do you not want to be alone with me?" With the fire right above us, I managed to see how his face tinted pink and I was in shock. "Ivar, are you 'blushing'?"

"I'm not. Just leave me alone." He moved my arm out of the way and went back to walking.

"Hold on- Ivar, talk to me." I caught him by his arm and made him turn around. "What is going on with you?"

"Nothing! Just leave me be, Hel."

"It's okay to tell me, I'm your friend. You can trust me." There was confusion on my face as I looked into his eyes, and he tried to back away but couldn't simply because his legs didn't work right even in the braces. "What are you so afraid of, Ivar?" There was a pause and he hesitantly put his hand on my shoulder.

He opened his mouth as if to speak, but the words didn't come and he swallowed. I simply waited for him to find his voice as his hand moved to the side of my neck and he put his forehead to mine. It was a familiar gesture, but it didn't give me an answer as the only noise I could hear was crackling fire and Ivar's breathing. I raised my brows as if to ask the question again but said nothing.

And then he kissed me.

It was quick and chaste before he turned away and it felt like I had been struck. I stopped him from walking away, grabbing the front of his shirt and pulling him down to my level. It took me a second to regain my composure as I just looked at him.

"Ivar Ragnarsson, you think _that_ is a kiss?" Asking, I didn't even give him time to answer before I pressed my lips against his. This time, however, I had the chance to feel how soft his lips were and could taste the ale on his tongue. It also dawned on me that the look I had seen on Heahmund's face was familiar because I had seen it on Ivar's.

His breath was uneven when I pulled back while grinning.

"Goodnight, arse-face." The blue eyed man didn't reply as he seemed dazed and I chuckled before walking off.

~

"We will be fighting against your brothers. Yes?" The bishop asked as he sat across from Ivar, playing that game with the white and black pieces with him.

"Yes. Perhaps even my brother Bjorn, if he returns from his travels."

"Do they frighten you, your brothers?"

"No." Ivar laughed. "Maybe Bjorn, _just_ a little. I don't find him very smart, but he is a great warrior. They call him Bjorn Ironside."

"And the woman, the one who killed your mother?"

"Lagertha. I've sworn to kill her. And she knows that I'll do it. She just doesn't know how bad it's going to be."

"Where will you fight?"

"I don't know. Perhaps they'll blockade themselves in Kattegat. The main town."

" _That_....would be foolish." Heahmund said while moving one of his pieces.

"Maybe you can help me think of a strategy."

"You would trust me to do that?" The Saxon laughed. "Even though I don't care which side wins?"

"Ah, but you want to win. I can see that. And I want to be around people who want to win." The youngest Ragnar son raised his hands and I stole Hvitserks goat meat since he was too busy paying attention to his brother and the Englishman. "What they do afterwards, who cares?"

"The fact is, I will only fight for you because I am certain, as certain as I can be, the _God_ wishes me to do so. That I am part of some plan which I cannot comprehend."

"Then you believe, like us, that you are fated, huh?" Hvitserk asked.

"No. I still believe I have free will. I choose to fight for you."

"If you are fated, it doesn't matter if you choose or not. You simply have the illusion of being free to choose." Ivar stated.

"I don't know." The older brother mumbled and took a drink.

"Excuse me?" Ivar turned to look at Hvitserk.

"I just don't know if, when I joined your side, whether is was fate or free will."

"What does it matter? Huh?" Hvitserk didn't answer and turned back to face his plate and paused seeing how he was missing food he did not eat.

"Hel!" He looked at me and I gave a mischievous grin.

"You must be more vigilant, dear Hvitserk. I was near stealing your drink as well."

"Sometimes I wonder who is worse- you or your father." He popped off, pulling his plate closer to himself to eat what was left.

"I feel as if I should take that as a compliment." And as soon as I said that, King Harald came in and was laughing with joy, patting Ivar's shoulder as he passed.

"What's the matter with you?" Ivar turned to the man pouring himself a drink.

"I'm going to be a father. Skol!" He chuckled.

"Skol!" I raised my glass and Harald grinned at me while nodding in appreciation before leaving. Heahmund moved a piece on the board, making Ivar's attention return to the game at hand. Later that day, a number of ships arrived from the great army still in England to assist us in the taking of Kattegat.

~

Casually walking past drunken men in the hall, I sought out Hvitserk and found him laughing in a group of men. I touched his shoulder to get his attention, and I gestured with my head.

"I have a question for you. One I do not wish to ask with so many ears listening." I glanced to the group of vikings looking at me and Hvitserk grabbed his cup.

"I'll be right back." He told them and followed me to an unoccupied part of the hall. "What is your question, Hel?"

"It's concerning Ivar." Looking around, I made sure no one was eavesdropping before turning my attention to Hvitserk.

"What has he done this time?" He sighed before taking a drink.

"It's not what he's done, it's what I have heard." I tapped my cup with my finger and furrowed my brows. "I thought I knew what it meant, but with the way men say it makes me believe I do not." The man raised a brow at me before waving his cup.

"And that is?"

"What do they mean when they say Ivar can't satisfy a woman?" Hvitserk spat out his drink so that he wouldn't choke, but he was coughing a bit anyway. "Well? Is he just that bad with sex?" The Ragnar son cleared his throat, glancing around before turning his attention to me.

"Well, Hel, it means he can't _please_ a woman. It's not that....he's bad at it...." He explained and I tilted my head while being rather confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Hel, I mean he _**can't**_....' _please_ ' a woman." Hvitserk sighed while shaking his head. "Why do I have to explain this? Look, Ivar _can't_....you know." He waved his hand while dropping his gaze and I finally got what he meant.

"Oh! You mean he can't- Oh, poor Ivar. No wonder he's so angry all of the time." I took a drink and Hvitserk snorted while shaking his head again. "Well, thank you for answering my question, Hvitserk. Now, I say we get extremely drunk and pray to the gods we do not wake in a puddle of fish guts." Turning the man around, I had my hand on his upper back while leading him back to the men he had previously been with. "To the abundance of drink. Skol!" I raised my cup and they returned the gesture.

"Skol!" They cheered.


	15. Losses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *WARNING: Mature content ahead, proceed at your own risk*

"Your Grace!" I called to the bishop walking down the dock. I was leaning on the edge of a boat as the ships all along the shore were being loaded to sail to Kattegat. Heahmund walked over to me and spoke lowly.

"Don't call me that. You think it's a joke, but you have no understanding of grace."

"Oh, why are you being so harsh, Bishop?" I waved my hand. "Still think me to be a temptress of the devil?" The Saxon didn't answer and I tilted my head. "I was not created nor sent by either your god or your devil. In no way have I seduced you."

"You needn't try. The forbidden fruit of Eden did not need to do anything either, but Adam and Eve still bit from it because of the devil's seduction, whispering in their ear, and they were too weak to only listen to God's word." Heahmund began to spout more of his Christian nonsense, but I didn't stop him- it wasn't like I understood what he was saying either. I didn't know who this Adam or Eve were, or what Eden was, but I was surely to ask Ivar later.

~

It was in a large clearing that our army faced Lagertha's. She was easy to spot in the front line on her white horse, and I could see Bjorn and Ubbe at her sides.

Bjorn and King Harald's brother alone road towards us, stopping halfway to indicate they wanted to speak. I pat Garmr's head as he stood at my side, watching the vikings bearing Lagertha's blue flags. King Harald and Hvitserk went to meet them.

"Ivar, I will admit that I wish you brothers did not fight." I spoke up, my eyes gazing across the landscape as a soft wind blew. I knew Ivar was looking at me and I continued. "You are all sons of the greatest man known to vikings."

"I understand your sentiment, Hel, but this is what is has come down to. I don't see a way around it if Lagertha remains on the throne of Kattegat."

"And tell me, Ivar, you are not doing this for your own ambition or greed, are you?" I glanced at the man in his chariot and he was now watching the four men talking even if he couldn't hear what they were saying.

"A little bit." He chuckled. "Who doesn't want to be a king? However, my main reason is to avenge the death of my mother and the theft of my home."

"It seems there will be negotiations." I stated, seeing Hvitserk following Bjorn back to Lagertha while King Harald and his brother were riding back to our side.

"So it seems." And each army fell back to their camps until they were to reconvene the following day.

"This is madness." Harald's brother said.

"Is it? You are here where you belong. Don't deny it. Why would you fight for Lagertha or Bjorn? They are not your folk." The king asked.

"Bjorn saved my life. Isn't that reason enough?"

"Not really." Ivar popped off. "We all choose to live a dangerous life. That is part of our way. So I think that you give what happened between you and Bjorn too much importance."

"Family has a greater claim." Harald added. "I don't want to fight against you. I don't want to have to kill you. The world would make no sense."

"I suppose none of this makes sense to him anyway." Halfdan looked to Heahmund as the Bishop was standing like a statue.

"He's a great warrior. He doesn't _need_ anything to make sense."

"By the gods, Ivar, you are so cynical." And the youngest Ragnar son began to chuckle. "You just don't care, do you?"

"I care. About winning this war. Halfdan, you have to choose between a friend or a brother. To me, the answer is obvious." Ivar tossed out what was left of his drink and crawled away. Heahmund watched him leave before speaking in his native tongue.

"The Lord hath said unto me, thou art my son; This day I have begotten you. Appeal to me....and I shall grant nations into your own inheritance, and I shall extend your authority over the borders of nations. And I will make you control them with an iron rod, and you might break them, as easily as....the potter....can break a pot."

I furrowed my brows while looking at the Bishop's back.

"What is begotten?" I questioned and the man looked over his shoulder at me.

"To give rise to, or bring into existence." He answered before leaving.

"....What was he saying?" Harald asked me.

"Mm, nothing of importance." I shrugged. "Just more of his Christian rambles."

~

"We all know today we have so many shieldmaidens and warriors-at-arms that we must decide whether we fight or we reach an accommodation allowing us to go live our lives with integrity and honor." Bjorn stated and the leaders of each army sat facing each other. I leaned on the back of Ivar's chair like Halfdan did Bjorn's, and Garmr was laying at his feet.

"I call upon my brothers, Ivar, Hvitserk." The oldest Ragnar son continued. "Let's put aside our differences, for the sake of our father. A civil war can only bring tragedy, weaken our family, and set in train a lifetime of revenge obligations for those who manage to survive! Is that really what you all want?"

"I want to speak up and support Bjorn, and his call for a peaceful resolution. It is true I set my face against my brother. But if you can forgive me, Ivar, let us make an accord." Ubbe spoke calmly.

"We are going to war for the Kingdom of Kattegat. The Kingdom of Kattegat was carved out by my husband Ragnar Lothbrok, and then by me. I am it's rightful queen." Lagertha stood and crows cawed. "What we should be discussing is that how we combine our great armies, and direct them out towards new lands, new conquests, new opportunities." She began to pace as the wind caused the colored flags to billow. "What a _terrible_ pity to kill our young men for a piece of land which is already ours." The blond woman's attention then went to Harald's wife. "Astrid. I am happy to see you again. Whatever has happened, I....don't want to fight you. ....Astrid."

"I am married now. I am King Harald's wife."

" _Queen_ Astrid, I suppose." And Lagertha paced the other way.

"Brother, let's not fight." Halfdan shook his head. "What can we gain? Nothing."

"On the contrary. We will gain the world. Join us and I will share it with you."

"It is really up to you, Ivar." Bjorn threw up his hands while looking straight across to his younger brother. "If you decide that you cannot fight against your brothers- that you do not _want_ to fight against your brothers- then we can find an accord. And King Harald can't stop us." He pointed at Harald. "Huh?"

"You have so much to lose, Ivar." Lagertha stated while coming over to stand in front of him. "If you want war, then let's have war. But win or lose- you lose. You gain victory over the other sons of Ragnar and people will say that you are an illegitimate ruler and a usurper. And if you lose, they will say it was by the will of the gods and the will of Ragnar, who now sups with them in Valhalla, and cries for us now." The man sat in front of me looked to become agitated by the woman's words.

"Do not do this, Ivar. We are sons of Ragnar. Is that not enough for any man?" Ubbe questioned. "Hel, you must agree with us." His eyes turned to me and there was a quiet pause until Ivar stood up.

"She does. Bring horns of mead. We should celebrate. There will be no battle today. Nor tomorrow." Ivar declared.

"What are you talking about?" King Harald got to his feet. "You cannot decide this!"

"I do not want to fight against my brothers. I _still_ hate myself for killing Sigurd. This would be 10 times worse. I....I can't." Ivar then turned to the Queen of Kattegat. "I renounce my promise to kill Lagertha. She can have Kattegat. I don't want it." He walked over to Ubbe and looked him in the eye. "Ubbe, you're right. We are _all_ sons of Ragnar. Forgive me."

Ubbe nodded and it felt as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I could continue the duty my father had given me to watch over the brothers without worrying one may kill another. Garmr got to his feet and left as carved horns of mead were brought. I didn't question what the wolf was doing, he was an animal with no ulterior motives.

"Skol!"

"Skol!" We all drank except for King Harald as he poured his drink out into the grass. All seemed well until Ivar threw his mead into Ubbe's face.

"How blue are my eyes, huh?"

"What?"

"How blue are my eyes?"

"Your eyes are very blue." Ubbe looked about as confused as the rest of us.

"Mmm. You remember I had to ask you every single morning how blue the whites of my eyes were? Because if they were very blue, I was in great danger of breaking a bone." Ivar pointed.

"Yes, I remember. It was a part of my childhood, 'How blue are Ivar's eyes today?'"

"I might break a bone. But I could never break a promise. I could _never_ forgive Lagertha for murdering our mother. How can you? Hmm?" The youngest Ragnar son questioned his older brother. "How can you?! Hmm?! Our mother!" He shouted. "Of course I'm going to kill her!"

"You can try." Lagertha poured out her drink and I plopped down in the chair Ivar had been sitting in and propped my leg up on the armrest, taking a drink from my cup before finally speaking.

"He will. And he will succeed."

"Hel, how can you just sit there and say such a thing? I thought you didn't want us fighting." Ubbe looked at me.

"I don't. However, I have no loyalties to that women. I hardly even know her." I gestured to the queen with my cup. "On the other hand, I knew Aslaug. She was a good queen and made even me feel welcomed in her home. I support Ivar's wish to avenge her, and you brothers need not fight. I think the only one with justified disagreement to this would be Bjorn, as he is her only son, not you, Ubbe." I then leaned my head back to look right at the oldest Ragnar son. "And Bjorn, I understand your anger, but your mother did kill the mother of your four brothers in cold blood."

"It was not in cold blood. I had to kill her to-"

"Lies, and you know it." I cut Lagertha off before taking a drink. "I may not have been there personally, but I know Aslaug was trying to leave peacefully before you killed her. You did not have to. You _wanted_ to. So, Ivar, if you so desire to kill the queen of Kattegat, I will not try to stop you."

"This was all a waste of time." Ubbe turned to leave.

"No. Not at all. You can surrender Kattegat now. You have all been talking about how terrible the slaughter will be." Ivar waved his hand. "How we will kill our nearest relations and members of our family. I don't want to do that. Let us not do it. You." He pointed at the queen. "Bjorn. Lagertha. Just go away. Leave this place. Do not put your men to the test." Ubbe and Bjorn were the first to draw their swords before the others followed suit. I, however, remained seated with my drink while the crows were still cawing.

The air was filled with tension, but Lagertha was holding Ubbe back from advancing by placing her hand on his chest.

"It is a shame you think that way, Hel. Your father and I were such good friends. I think he'd be rather ashamed if he saw you now." I paused before getting up and walking past Ivar and Harald, going straight over to the blonde woman. She was taller than me, so I had to look up at her as I tossed my cup over my shoulder.

"Hel-"

"Shut up, Ubbe." My voice was calm as I looked into the woman's eyes. "I can see your fear, Lagertha."

"I am not afraid."

"You are. You see, the thing about people is that no matter how they posture themselves or however they force their expressions, their eyes are what give away the truth. You may look like a strong woman ready to die for her kingdom, but when I look into your eyes do you know what I see, Lagertha?" I leaned a bit closer and noticed her jaw clench as she swallowed. "A woman scared for her life. Now, there's something else there, too." Chuckling, I shifted on my feet but did not break eye contact with her. "You saw a Seer, didn't you? Oh, I bet he told you you would die at the hands of a Ragnar son, didn't he? Didn't specify which one, probably, Seer's never give straight answers, but there are two right now behind me that are both wanting you dead. Or, perhaps, the one to kill you could be Ubbe. Hel, by some sick twist of fate it could be your own son."

"You don't know anything." Lagertha's voice shook.

"Oh, but I do. I am Hel, daughter of Floki and Brenna, marked by the gods since birth, and I know _many_ things." Taking a step back, I pointed at her. "And you, Lagertha, have been fated to be killed by one of Ragnar's own sons." Turning, I walked away from her and right past the people holding the colored flags.

~

"Hel, why did you say those things to Lagertha?" Ivar questioned as he leaned onto the tree I sat under. Garmr was in the river, biting at the little fish that swam past.

"She said my father would be ashamed of me. I wasn't going to say _nothing_ to that." I replied, and the man grunted as he sat down next to me, his legs straight out due to the braces. Setting his crutch into the grass, he then dropped his hands into his lap.

"Was it true?"

"Of course." I tossed the blade of grass I had been picking at. "I see many things in the eyes of people. ....That's how I know you're a good man at heart, Ivar." I scoffed while watching Garmr splash about. "I think if it weren't for your anger, other people would see that, too."

"Are you actually being nice to me?" Ivar popped off while chuckling.

"Never." I smiled at him. "How could anyone be nice to a prick like you?"

"Oh, that hurts, Hel. That hurts." He put his hand over his heart while giving a pitiful face. Leaning over, I gave a devilish smirk and glanced from his eyes to his lips.

"Then let me kiss it better." Putting my hand on his cheek, he was very accepting of the kiss that followed. I again tasted alcohol on his tongue and I relished in how his breath became uneven from just a kiss. The man seemed so weak in that moment as I could feel his heart pounding beneath my palm, and I swung my leg over to straddle his lap.

Ivar's hands were hesitant to touch me but eventually came to rest on my hips. However, when I trailed kisses down the side of his neck, he pushed me back. It was dark out, so only the moon allowed me to see his strained expression.

"Hel....there's something I need to tell you." His voice was soft between breaths as he looked me in the eye. "You....you need to know this before you decide to go any further with me." Ivar swallowed and what looked like pain flashed across his face as my brows furrowed. "I will never be able to give you what other men can. Hel, I can't-"

"I know, Ivar." I cupped his cheek while giving him a gentle look. "I am aware of your circumstances, but that isn't going to stop me from desiring what I do. I want to be with you, Ivar, even if you can't please me a certain way. You are a fool to think there aren't other ways, though." I said lowly while grabbing one of his hands and leading it to my chest.

His gaze dropped from my face as he gulped and it was clear he was staring at where his hand was placed.

"What do you want to do, Ivar?" I asked lowly.

"I....I want to feel your skin. I want to feel you." He mumbled and I barely even heard him from how quiet he was.

"Then you shall." I ran my thumb over his bottom lip before standing up to drop my sword into the grass and to take my pants off before I dropped back into his lap and began to work on taking his armor and shirt off. He was clearly very nervous, especially when he sat there half naked and watched as I went to finish getting undressed.

Being completely bare before him, Ivar's eyes were glued to my body and he was seemingly frozen in place. Chuckling, I placed my hands onto his chest and let my fingers move over his warm skin.

"I thought you wanted to feel me as well, Ivar. You can." His jaw clenched as he glanced to my face and he tentatively reached out and put his hands onto my waist at first. His hands were rough feeling as they slid over my skin, but I found it exciting while they traveled up my stomach and to my chest. I took in a sharp breath when he squeezed my breasts in his hands, and I leaned forward to lick his cheek as my palms ran over his abs. "Good boy." I purred in his ear and I could feel the heat coming off of his face and body.

Ivar's touch moved and went down my back, feeling along my spine before he cupped my ass and groped it. I grew more aroused the longer his hands were on me while his breath was hitting my skin as his fingers grabbed at my thighs as well.

"You're....so soft." He swallowed. "But strong. I....I want to taste you."

"Then do it." I smirked before my face and breath faltered from his tongue running up between my breasts. My back arched when he nipped and Ivar seemed to like that response as he did it again. My face burned, but this wasn't enough and I took one of his hands to put it between my legs. He let me lead his fingers to my clit and I moaned at his touch. Ivar got the idea of what to do from there and I let him go to grab his shoulders to keep myself steady.

His mouth and tongue were on my chest while his hands were on my ass and clit and, gods, it was feeling good. I did't restrain my moans, I wanted to let Ivar know he was doing it right. My nails dug into his skin as one of his fingers slid past my slick folds and he bit my collarbone.

"So wet.....because of _me_." He had a tone of pride and I pulled his hair to see his face. The blue eyed man had a cocky grin and I bit my bottom lip while smiling.

"Well, despite my many insults, you are very beautiful, Ivar. And you feel just as good as you look." I panted before moaning as he thrusted a second finger in.

"Really, now?" He seemed to have gained confidence after his initial shyness as he watched my body arch into him. Panting, I ground my hips into his hand, groaning from the rough friction and how his thick fingers stretched my walls. Ivar's gaze remained on my face for a bit, watching my expression before his eyes drifted down to observe other parts of me.

But, suddenly, he stopped as his gaze dropped even lower.

"Hel...."

"What?" I whimpered, rolling my hips to try and keep the movement he had ceased giving.

"I'm hard."

"What?" Stopping, I leaned back to see what exactly he was looking at and saw something straining beneath his pants and between his legs. We both just paused for a second at the utter shock of it, especially since we were both aware how his attempts with Margarithe had all failed, making Ivar and everyone else believe he was inept. I don't know why, but I wanted to be sure it was actually his dick making his pants taut and not some dangerously hidden knife.

Undoing his pants, a cock sprung free and there was another pause as we both stared. My thighs unintentionally clenched at the sight of it, and Ivar slowly looked up at me with a grin and a predatorial gaze. I gasped as I was suddenly flipped onto my back and Ivar was on me, holding my face as he passionately kissed me while grinding his pelvis into mine.

Moaning into his mouth, I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck as I felt his manhood sliding over my clit. When Ivar pulled back from the kiss, his breath shook as he felt me against him. Reaching down, I wrapped my fingers around his length and chuckled at how his jaw clenched. I led Ivar's cock to my entrance and the man greedily entered, causing my head to fall back with a louder moan.

Ivar's muscles tensed as he placed his hands onto the ground for stability, groaning as he thrusted his hips. I licked over the man's throat, feeling it vibrate from the noises coming from his mouth and I dug my nails into the back of his neck as I moaned. Kissing and nipping at the side of Ivar's neck, I left marks as he was grunting and pumping his cock in and out of me.

"Steady, Ivar." I panted before moaning. "Keep it steady or you will finish much too soon." He listened to what I had said and slowly gained a rhythm. Ivar was such a sight sweating above me with his face twisted with pleasure, his muscles rolling as his body moved over mine. This was a rather welcomed turn of events as my back arched and his lips were on my skin.

My breasts were bouncing with every thrust of his pelvis and a shiver ran up my spine from his hot breath hitting my bare skin as he kissed and bit me. Every moan he gave was like its own kind of seducing sound and I definitely wanted to hear more.

Ivar grunted when I switched our positions and I was roughly riding him, my palms on his heaving chest while his hands were now able to wander and grope. Looking down at him as he laid in the grass, I knew I was close to cumming and he was too with the look on his face as his head fell back.

"Oh, my gods, Hel!" He groaned while his fingers dug into my thighs. "Say my name." The man beneath me panted. "Say my name."

"Ivar~!" I moaned and he bucked, making my toes curl. "Ivar~! Fuck- Ivar~!" He snarled, grabbing my hips and pulling me down on him even harder. My hands left his chest and tangled in my own hair as my head fell back, moans spilling from my lips in heavy succession while I was filled by the blue eyed man.

There was a flooding heat as it felt like a knot in my gut was yanked undone and we were panting loudly and sweating despite the chill in the air. I rode out my high while rocking my hips, not caring how I would later have bruises where Ivar was gripping my thighs so tightly. Laying beside him to catch my breath in the cool grass, I rested my head on his shoulder.

The sky overhead was filled with stars and Ivar started laughing.

"What's so funny?" I panted.

"Nothing." His chest was rising and falling with his heavy breath as he spoke. "You are a goddess, Hel. A true goddess." Ivar chuckled.

"I am not a goddess."

"You are _my_ goddess." He waved a finger. "You've given me many blessings already."

"Oh, no, I didn't break you, did I?" I propped myself up while looking at the blue eyed man with concern. "That wasn't too much for your first time, was it? Please tell me your brains didn't boil."

"No, Hel, I'm fine. It's just....after everything with Margarithe, I thought I'd never be able to please a woman. That I'd never be a _'real'_ man. You," He softly laughed while looking at me. "you proved otherwise." Rolling onto my side, I rested my chin on his shoulder and my hand on his chest.

"Did you ever think the reason it didn't work with Margarithe was because you just didn't like her? Or were too nervous?"

"What are you talking about? Margarithe is a very pretty girl. Why do you think almost all of my brothers have had her?"

"Ivar, I'm not talking about how she looks." Leaning over the man while looking down at him, I tapped his chin. "How you feel _can_ effect other things. Just because she's pretty doesn't mean you will have any feelings for her- sometimes that influences things." I explained. "Like if you're too nervous, scared, or simply have no attraction to her despite her beauty. Being able to have sex doesn't make you a 'real man' either, Ivar. ....But, I will admit, it was very pleasant having sex with you."

"I love you." He blurted and I felt my eyes widen a fraction.

"Wha-"

"I love you." Ivar's voice was softer as he took my hand in his. "Continue to be my goddess. After we take back Kattegat, I will make you a queen."

"I don't want to be queen, Ivar." I laughed. "Being with you is enough for me...." Smiling, I kissed him and saw how his eyes glittered in the moonlight after.

"I want to have sex with you again, Hel." Ivar stated.

"Aren't you a quick one." Chuckling, I pressed my lips to his once more.

~

Ivar raised his fist to halt the army behind us as we saw the enemy on the other side of the field. He sat in his chariot, looking to the opposing forces while studying them and thinking. Lagertha had Bjorn and Ubbe on her side and both where aware of Ivar's tactical skills- they wouldn't just run into battle against him without a plan.

Garmr was standing at my side, seeming restless as he dropped his head. It was hard to tell from the distance, but I couldn't spot Lagertha anywhere in the front lines, only Bjorn and his brother.

"I can't wait." The bishop spoke up, gaining Ivar's attention.

"Why? Does that beautiful sword of yours thirst for blood?"

"Perhaps my God intended it to slake its thirst upon pagan blood." Heahmund's sword hissed as he drew it and he laid his hand upon the blade gently. "That's why I'm here; to do the Lord's bidding."

"And mine, Bishop Heahmund. And mine." Ivar replied and the war drums began to beat across the field.

"What do you think?" The king questioned.

"I have a feeling Bjorn is playing a game."

"What kind of game?"

"Well, what if he's keeping a part of his army in reserve? What if this battle is just a feint? What if his _real_ plan is to outflank us, drag on and destroy our boats?" Ivar waved his hand and I pat Garmr's head while still looking to the enemy lines.

"What should we do?"

"I'll pull back a third of our army. To protect our ships. ....It is a risk, but it would be far worse to lose our entire fleet. So I think we should send Hvitserk and some men into the woods over there and try to outflank them, dividing Bjorn's forces."

"I agree." Herald nodded while shifting on his feet. "If you take Astrid back with you. I don't want her to die."

"No." The queen turned with a sharp look on her face.

"Yes."

"I am fighting."

"Not today." Herald stated and a few of his men grabbed Astrid to ensure she wouldn't disobey. Glancing to them, I retained an unreadable expression to keep my own thoughts hidden. I never much worried about the outcome of a battle- I myself had yet to lose a fight- but now....now I worried.

Ragnar's sons were gifted in their own ways, powerful and capable, but of them only two had the ability to make me unsure of the outcome of a fight. Those very two were now on opposite sides and ready to go to war with one another. Ivar and Bjorn, the youngest and the eldest of the sons, were smart but in different ways.

Bjorn had been in countless battles, his genius honed by years of first hand experience and being trained by Ragnar himself. Ivar, on the other hand, saw things most others didn't. He could put himself in the mind of his enemy if he wasn't being too cocky and could anticipate their every move. He lacked the sort of experience Bjorn had, but he had a fire in him that Bjorn did not.

There was no telling the outcome of this with each leader's perspective strengths and weaknesses. It seemed our victory would hinge on if Ivar would take the right risks, see the right path, or if he would try to play it safe since he knew of Bjorn's possible threat. I myself didn't know what Ivar was thinking- no one could unless they were on his level- but I was hoping he wasn't being too overcautious about this. Him being overcautious could be exactly what Bjorn was hoping for.

"Hel, with me." Ivar nodded to me before looking to his brother. Hvitserk turned to his section of the army and yelled for them to follow him as he ran towards the woods. I pat the side of the chariot and Garmr hopped up by Ivar as we and a third of the army went the opposite direction of Hvitserk. Our own war drums began to beat as King Harald took lead of what was left of the men in the field.

I watched the field for as long as I could before the trees blocked my view of the battle I heard start shortly after. The clashing of swords and axes rang through the air through the shouting and screaming, and when it got even loud Ivar stopped.

"Hold! Hold!"

"What are you doing?" Astrid questioned, furrowing her brows as she looked to Ivar.

"I have to listen. I have to know whether I am right or wrong." Time felt like it was dragging as we listened to the sounds of war echoing through the trees. Tension filled the air and I felt on edge just standing there while such a great battle was happening just a little ways off from where we were now.

The clashing and the shouting continued and I felt just as restless as Garmr.

"I think we should go back." I spoke up, shifting my weight on my feet.

"And I think we should wait. Good things happen to people who wait." Ivar popped off while keeping his eyes to the horizon where all of the noise was coming from.

"They need us." A horn blew only twice before it was cut of mid blow. "Ivar, they need us!"

"It's too late." He clenched is jaw while gripping the reigns of his chariot.

"We have to-"

"It's too late!" He roared, looking me in the eye and I knew he was right, but I didn't want it to be true. We would not have victory on this day. The only hope we had now of salvaging our numbers would be if Harald called for a retreat and even then there was no telling how many would be left in our army.

Ivar waited a bit longer and the king came running over the hill with the survivors following.

"We have lost." Harald panted as Hvitserk came up to stand beside him.

"Where's Heahmund?"

"Your preacher is dead." Harald then turned to his wife. "Come." Even a fool could tell how angry Ivar was. Losing this battle had a large cost- a larger cost than even the lives lost to the enemy swords. Hvitserk hopped up behind his brother on the chariot and placed a hand on his shoulder.


	16. War Goes On

"You were too clever for your own good, Ivar." King Harald stated as he walked up. We were back in his kingdom, tending to the injured and regathering our strength for our next move. "We had the advantage....and we lost." He looked down at the man laying across a bench.

"As I remember, you approved the plan."

"Up until that moment you proved yourself a *good* tactician." Harald took a seat while waving his hand. "I believed in you. I might not be so quick to indulge your plans next time."

"You do as you see fit, King Harald."

"Ivar, Uncle Rolo once told me on a ship on our way back from the Mediterranean- he said that if I ever needed his support all I had to do....was ask." Hvitserk spoke up and Ivar was quiet as I took a drink from my mead.

"What do you think?" King Harald gestured before leaning forward when no reply came. "Come on. What do you *think*. You want the French to help us?"

"I think you are to leave at first light tomorrow." Ivar droned and Hvitserk excitedly got up from his seat and left to get ready. King Harald paused to study Ivar for a second, but glanced to me before also leaving. Silence fell as it was now only Ivar and I left at the table.

"You were scared, weren't you? Frightened?"

"What are you talking about? There's nothing to be scared of."

"I mean with what happened. You were overthinking because of Bjorn. You've said it yourself that he was the only one to worry you. He used your caution against you." I looked straight ahead and took another drink from the carved horn. Ivar said nothing and I couldn't see his reaction from where I sat. "Your uncle....what kind of man is he? Will he actually help us?"

"Rolo is a traitor and not to be trusted....however he can be useful."

"And you're certain he won't try to take Kattegat for himself?"

"He has no need when he has such a rich kingdom already."

"....Is it wise to send Hvitserk on his own?"

"What, are you his mother?"

"No, Ivar. I just don't want him to die."

"He'll be fine. From what I hear, our uncle quite likes Hvitserk."

~

I couldn't even count the number of Frankish soldiers that marched up from the port. Their marching feet beat to a rhythm as their scaled armor clanked with their movement. Their colors were a soft blue like the ocean but their helmets looked absolutely ridiculous.

"Where is Rolo?"

"Rolo couldn't come. He had too many responsibilities. But he also told me that he'll come back and celebrate with us. Afterwards." Hvitserk smiled and I grabbed the end of the blue cape fabric he wore draped around his shoulders. It was undoubtedly a gift from the Franks and it was woven in such a way to keep the wearer warm.

"Mm-hm."

"He only asked for one thing." Hvitserk's smile dropped as he ignored me while I was inspecting the garment he wore.

"And what was that?"

"That we spare Bjorn's life." The older brother replied and Ivar glanced to Harald and Astrid. They nodded and left, going back towards the market.

"Perhaps we will." The youngest smiled and there was a glint in his eye.

"Get that look off your face." I piped up, dropping the cloth in my hands.

"What look?"

"That look."

"I don't have a look."

"Yes you do. If sparing Bjorn is the only price for this army, you better fucking do it." I rose my eyebrows at Ivar and now both brothers were looking at me.

~

"Where is Rolo? Where is my uncle?" Bjorn questioned while looking between Hvitserk and Ivar.

"I went to see him. He sends his love to you, Bjorn Ironside. Hopes you're not willing to fight against his forces." Hvitserk replied while sitting on the edge of a table.

"Then why would he ally his forces to you?"

"He didn't tell. That's the truth. Only that he was prepared to do so."

"I can tell you." Ivar raised his head, looking up at his eldest brother as he sat on the floor. "Rolo sees Justice in our cause. Lagertha murdered our mother and usurped her kingdom."

"All that is in the past now, Ivar." Bjorn sighed.

"I must avenge my mother's murder. And I think you would do the same if it was you."

"For the sake of our father....for the sake of our father's legacy, everything he believed in, I am asking you, Ivar....do not put our people's lives at risk."

"The only reason why you're saying this is because you see all the _might_ gathering against you. If you still thought you could win, you would not be here, Bjorn. The fact is you're afraid."

"I am not afraid. This changes nothing."

"Well." Ivar waved his hand and warriors came in.

"What is this?" Harald stood from his chair before turning to the youngest Ragnar son and pointing. "You know as well as I do that _this_ is not our way. It's not our way." Sighing through my nose, I got up from my seat and went to the table Bjorn was sat at. Stomping up onto the table, I drew my sword and locked eyes with Ivar.

"You know where I stand, Ivar. Don't push it."

"....It was worth a try." Ivar rolled his head before waving the warriors back. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw Bjorn looking at me with a calculating gaze.

"I'm sorry Rolo had to involve himself in our quarrel." Bjorn got to his feet and turned away. "Doesn't he have enough worlds to conquer?"

~

I awoke in a cold sweat, panting as I heard a cry that it took me a second to realize was my own. Garmr was quick to hop onto the bed, licking my face to make sure I was okay.

"I'm fine. I'm fine." I panted, rubbing my hands over my face as the wolf backed up and laid down, resting his head in my lap while whimpering. Taking a deep breath, I let it out and dropped my hands to pet Garmr's ears.

The door suddenly slammed open and my head jerked up to see Ivar standing there, leaning on his crutch while having an axe in his other hand. He was quickly looking around the room but saw no one but the wolf and I.

"I heard you shouting." He seemed a bit out of breath and his shoulders were tense. "Why were you shouting?"

"You can lower the axe, Ivar. It was just a dream." I sighed and Ivar visibly relaxed before closing the door and coming to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Who would have thought Hel could have bad dreams."

"It actually wasn't a bad dream." I scoffed, looking down at Garmr as he was now content from me petting him. The man raised a brow at me and I pushed my hair out of my face. "It was my first battle." I told him. "The first time I was drenched in enemy blood." Grabbing the collar of Ivar's shirt, I felt a grin pull at my lips as I looked at him. "Ivar....we're going to win."


	17. "Thus spake my mother"

I raised my head as the vikings around me began to sing, looking into the thick forest in the direction the other army was in. King Harald seemed to be the one leading them in song and the birds overhead went quiet.

" _~Fley ok fagrar árar, Fara á brott með víkingum, Fara á brott með víkingum, Stýra dýrum knerri, standa upp í stafni, Stýra dýrum knerri, Halda svá til hafnar~_ " The forest was rather quiet, carrying their voices far and wide in the early morning air. " _~Stýra dýrum knerri, Halda svá til hafnar, Höggva mann ok annan, Höggva mann ok annan.?~_ " The singing along with the sounds of sharpening blades only added to the atmosphere- Despite the previous battle, this one would undoubtedly hold more significance.

Breathing in the crisp air, I looked to the sky through the lush branches on the trees. The gods would either be for us or against us, but I had the strong feeling today would end in our victory. I don't know how, but I felt as if I just _knew_ we wouldn't lose and I prayed I wasn't wrong.

"Tyr," I spoke softly while while painting Garmr's fur. "I hope you are with us. You are for justice, and this war is to bring such." Garmr was patient, standing right in front of me as I sat on a stump on the edges of camp as his smokey fur was marked. I usually didn't have to do this, but with the foreign warriors in our aid I didn't want any confusion to arise on the battlefield.

"This land belongs to the sons of Ragnar, not to a woman that murdered her way to the throne in their absence. This wrong must be righted. Odin...." My hands paused in Garmr's fur. "Odin, if I am to die today....I pray I am worthy to enter your hall." Chuckling, I dropped my hands into my lap. "I would very much like to fight at my mother's side again."

"Are you talking to that wolf again?"

"No, Ivar, I'm talking to the gods." I stated as the taller male limped to a rock to sit down.

"You said we would win, did you not?"

"I did."

"Then clearly we have the gods' favor. You are marked by the gods, Hel."

"Just because I may be marked by the gods does not mean I can't die."

"Sometimes I wonder. You've yet to lose."

"I'm serious, Ivar." I looked up at him and watched his smile fall. "Victory does not ensure survival, it only means our side doesn't lose."

"Do you feel like you will die today?"

"....I don't. But who knows when my time may come."

"Stop it."

"Stop what? The truth?" Furrowing my brows, I waved my hand. "The plan of the gods is not always clear, Ivar. So that is why I ask that if I do die today, I die a warriors death so that I may see my mother. I want to tell her myself the tales of my triumphs and adventures."

"You won't die, Hel. Not today. Not anytime soon." Ivar said with such certainty in his voice. "The longer you live, the more you have to tell your mother."

"This is true." I nodded. "But it isn't my decision."

"Then let's say I know you won't die today just like you know we will win."

"Oh? Did the gods tell you?"

"Hel. Have faith." Ivar raised his head while smiling and gestured by waving his hand. "The gods blessed you for a reason, I doubt you are just going to die now after everything. As we, the sons of Ragnar, go down in history as our father before us, so shall you. You've yet to make the legacy the gods intend you to have."

"Ivar, you're too sweet. It's sickening." We both laughed, but the weight of what was to come didn't lift. I may not fear death like some men, but that didn't mean I wasn't aware of my own mortality. But it wasn't in the same way as Ivar. No, Ivar was aware of his own mortality, but he didn't fear death to the point that he dared it. He knew he could die but he believed with such a strong conviction that it wouldn't be anytime soon, that he was just out of reach of dying.

Ivar liked to challenged death, to look Hel and the Valkyries right in their eyes and dare them to take his soul. I wondered if his boldness had a valid reason or if he was on the verge of just majorly pissing off some higher beings.

~

"What do you fear most, dear brother? The loss of thought or memory?"

"My thoughts and memories seem to be the same thing." Hvitserk replied. "Every time I think, I always remember the day I jumped out of Ubbe's ship."

"But you didn't jump. The gods pushed you."

"Don't take it away from me." The older brother snapped while the younger only chuckled. "I wasn't pushed. I decided to do it."

"And I think you still regret it."

"I have no regrets. Except....I don't have any children. But then again," Hvitserk chuckled and pat Ivar's knee. "Ivar, you and me are in the same boat, huh?"

"Nonsense. I will have children."

"Oh?"

"And my children will populate the Earth." Ivar stated and I choked on my drink as Hvitserk laughed.

"Yeah, sure." Ivar suddenly had a knife to Hvitserk's throat to get him to stop laughing and I lowered my cup while wiping the spilt water from my face. "Ivar." Neither of them moved, but the youngest of the two had that predatory glint in his eye.

"Ivar." I said his name clearly and he dropped his arm, Hvitserk shot me a thankful look.

"I am anxious about the battle. I am sorry."

"You're sorry?"

"I'm sorry you jumped ship." Ivar scoffed. "It was a mistake. I know you have regretted it ever since. And isn't that true, huh, poor Hvitserk?"

"Maybe sometimes." Hvitserk stated, keeping eye contact with his brother.

"Maybe sometimes?" Ivar scoffed again, leaning on his walking stick. "I thought that perhaps you jumped ship because you loved me. But of course you didn't. How could you ever love me?"

"He's your brother, Ivar. He's still here. Of course he loves you- even if only a little." I chuckled, grabbing Hvitserk's head and pushing it down a little. "If he didn't, he would have taken his chance when he had it to rejoin Ubbe."

"What makes you so sure?" That icy gaze turned to me and I let Hvitserk sit up straight again.

"Because he's had more chances to leave you than he's had to join you and yet here he sits before you. He's not a dog, Ivar, that's not where his loyalty comes from. Isn't that right, Hvitserk?"

"Like he'd listen to me."

"Pay attention." I smacked Hvitserk upside his head. "He's listening now. Gods, no wonder my father left me the duty of keeping you lot together. You're all so stupid."

"I am not!" The older of the two brothers shot me a look.

"I think it's quite clear that I'm smart." Ivar had a cocky grin and I shook my head while hooking my thumbs behind my belt.

"Not in the sense you need. Sure, you're a wonderful tactician and good at reading people's hearts, but you're too untrustworthy, too paranoid." Taking a few steps, I stood behind Ivar and placed my hands onto his shoulders before leaning down to be eye level with the boys. "Look at him, Ivar. You're too used to seeing your brothers as rivals rather than as equals. Look at Hvitserk and read him as if he were a stranger. You can see the fear, yes, but beneath that there is more." Hvitserk just looked at me as if he was trying to figure something out but couldn't just yet.

"You're doing to me what you did to Lagertha, aren't you?" The older male questioned and I smirked.

"You're easier, Hvitserk. So open, but still so cautious. I can see your love for your brothers, _all_ of them, but you _are_ scared of Ivar. I can understand that, dangerous things happen when his anger gets the better of him and that does happen often. And it's not your fear that keeps you here, it's not your fear that keeps you on the battlefield against your other brothers. You do have bravery, Hvitserk, and you believe in what this war is for. Kattegat belonged to Ragnar and Aslaug, which then should have been passed to his sons. The throne does not belong to Ragnar's previous wife, she is but a thief ruling on stolen time."

"Why are you so invested in this, Hel? Why do you care?" I watched as Hvitserk's brows furrowed.

"Because Aslaug openly welcomed me here. Because this land was my father's home. Because Ragnar was my father's best friend. I have many reasons."

"But Floki is no longer here, and both our father and mother are dead. Why are _you_ loyal to _our_ side?" Standing up all of the way, I looked down at Hvitserk and took in a deep breath through my nose.

"Because it's what I believe is right. My home is not a land, it is people, and you boys have become pack." My gaze drifted to Garmr as his head lifted from the ground. "Sounds like the war drums have started."

~

The once green grass was red with all the blood spilt upon it. Bodies littered the field, fallen from both sides. I had been in the first wave of our army along with Garmr and I had lost sight of the massive wolf. I knew he was still alive, I could hear his vicious snarling and barking among the screaming and yelling men.

Burying my axe into a shieldmaiden's skull, I used my foot to kick her off of my weapon. She had fought well, so I doubted she wouldn't see the great walls of Valhalla. I looked up to see a rain of arrows arching over the field and towards the hills where the rest of our army resided. My eyes quickly found Ivar roaring at the oncoming wave of death, but as the men around him fell he remained standing and uninjured as the arrows landed.

That smug bastard.

Laughing, I turned back as a sword was being swung at me and I stepped back to dodge before impaling the man on my own sword. The second wave of our army was soon crashing into the field and I could barely make out Bjorn's bellowing voice.

"Retreat! Retreat!" And word spread as our enemies turned to escape while they still could. Raising my axe into the air, I howled with victory while covered in blood. Garmr returned my call from halfway across the battlefield.


	18. Hel

"People of Kattegat! I am Ivar the Boneless! I am a son of Ragnar Lothbrok! All hail your new King!" Ivar shouted from his chariot and the crowd went to their knees while bowing their heads to the man. I could tell from the look on his face that Ivar _very_ much liked his new status.

~

The hall was filled with laughter and shouting from all of the drinking and brawling warriors and spectators. I sat next to King Harald before the thrones, drinking mead from a carved horn and celebrating our victory like the others.

"To Kattegat!" King Harald raised his horn and a cheer rang out among the chaos.

"To Kattegat!"

"The greatest prize of all." Harald slurred and I looked over to where Garmr was to check on him only to see the wolf with a very drunk Ivar as the two of them were pissing on what was previously Lagertha's throne. Rolling my eyes, I scoffed before taking a drink.

"As long as Lagertha remains alive, then I have not yet had my revenge." Ivar limped over and plopped down beside Harald. "We have gained the Kingdom of Kattegat, but I still have a hollow feeling inside." He said and drank from his horn.

"Don't worry. How long can she and the others escape us? We have scouts everywhere! And, after all, where can they go? Who will shelter them from us?" Harald questioned and I stood up.

"Where are you going?" Ivar looked at me and I handed him my cup.

"Hold that for me. I gotta take a piss."

"Ah, ladylike as ever, Hel." Harald grinned, but I simply waved my hand and made my way through the crowd of drunken people. When I found myself outside, I took in a deep breath of fresh air and let it out slowly. With the cold of the night, my breath was visible as it curled up towards the sky in a small cloud.

Putting my hands onto my lower back, I leaned back to pop my spine before stretching out my arms and rounding the hall. It was quieter out here, but there were still drunken vikings stumbling about and the roaring from within the hall could still be heard.

"Hel." I raised my head upon hearing my name, seeing a man that was taller and broader than me standing a few feet behind me.

"Yes?" My brow raised at the blue-eyed brunette, his face was only vaguely familiar but I couldn't recall his name if I had ever even known it.

"I've been meaning to speak to you, but you are hardly ever alone." The man chuckled, taking a step forward as he looked at me.

"What do you want?" I turned to face him, crossing my arms over my chest as he took another step closer. There was something about him, something in his eyes, that I knew was trouble but I couldn't tell how.

"I just wanted to ask," He suddenly pushed me down by my shoulders and I hit the ground harshly. "how do you like being the whore for the Ragnar sons?" The man's tone shifted as he stood over me, but as I was sitting up and baring my teeth, he was on me and trying to pin me down to the cold, hard earth. "You must _love_ the favor and partiality you get from them just because you fuck them."

I tried to push the man off of me, but I was at a disadvantage and he had leverage over me.

"Well, let's see if those pricks are still fond of their toy once it's been broken." He swung a fist and the ring on his finger busted my lip. The man only pissed me off even more when he ripped the ties on my shirt, exposing my collarbone and cleavage. When he shifted to pull my pants down, I took the opening he made and reared up my legs to mule kick him in the gut.

My jaw ached and my lip stung as I stood up, glaring at the man scrambling to his feet.

"So, pissed off the princes treated me well?" I dodged his fist as he swung at me. "Think it's because I'm their whore, huh?" Growling, I kicked the man in the chest and he hit the side of the building behind him. "And you really thought raping me would quell your jealousy?" I pulled a knife from my boot and flipped it in my hand. "You're a _fool_."

"Bitch!" He lunged at me and I swung a fist right to the center of his face.

Shortly after, I was dragging the man now bloodied and bruised into the hall. The rowdy voices began to die down as the crowd parted and I wasn't even in the mood to question the goat wearing a crown standing on the pissed on throne. Going to the center of the room, I stopped walking and Ivar furrowed his brows.

"Hel? What in Odin's name happened?" He questioned and I stood up straight while glancing around the room.

"It looks as if I've gone soft since coming to Kattegat." I declared with a loud and clear voice. "Before....never would a man even _dare_ to do what this man did. I tried to be on my best behavior when coming here, to try and see how things would go in this new kingdom, with these new people." My expression was hard as I bared my teeth. "But apparently I made myself look weak instead."

Pulling the man's hair to lift up his broken and bruised face, I glared down at him.

"Go on, now. Tell them all what you tried to do." I told the brunette as his breathing was labored and wheezy, but he didn't speak. " _Tell them_." I growled.

"I...." He swallowed, knowing that all eyes were now on him. "I was just walking by....and she attacked me." I drove my knife through his shoulder and he screamed.

"Don't lie now, big man. Where'd that cocky attitude go? You were so confident in what you were doing before."

"Hel, what is the meaning of this?" Ivar looked bewildered and angry at the same time and I pat the bloodied man's cheek.

"Go on, tell your King why our celebration has been interrupted. And tell the truth." I wiggled the knife's handle and the man cried out.

"....I tried...." The brunette looked to be trying to find a way out of this, but my hold on him tightened and he knew he had no way of escape. "I tried to rape Hel." He said quietly and I heard a few gasps from the crowd.

"You all heard the confession." I waved my free hand around, gesturing to the people in the room. "Now....see what happens to those that cross me." Grabbing the man's chin and the back of his head, I twisted his skull around, audibly hearing the cracking of his neck. Letting go, the man fell stomach down with his face blankly staring at the ceiling. Tension sparked in the air as there was dead silence. "To Kattegat!" I rose my voice, picking up a glass and downing the mead inside.

There was hesitation, but the others returned the cheer.

"To Kattegat!"

~

"Stop stumbling and walk straight, you cripple." I popped off, helping Ivar walk to his new bed as the scent of alcohol strongly came from him.

"You're stumbling." He retorted.

"Maybe you'd be more steady if you had your crutch."

"Maybe I'd be more steady if I wasn't a cripple, Hel."

"Maybe." I chuckled while pushing open the door. "Your brother passed out on a table. What do you want me to do with him?"

"Leave him." Ivar waved his hand. "He can sleep there just fine."

"How rude." Helping the brunette to sit down onto the edge of the bed, his arm slid from my shoulders as his hands dropped into his lap.

"Rude? He's the one that can't handle his mead." I just laughed, not saying anything as I helped the drunken man unlace and pull off his armor.

"Raise your arms." Ivar did as he was told and I pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it to the chair in the corner. Going to the dresser to find something for him to wear to bed, a hand wrapping around my wrist stopped me. "What is it, Ivar?" His demeanor seemed to change as he was just staring straight ahead with such a serious expression. "Ivar?"

"We were supposed to rejoice in our victory." He mumbled after clenching his jaw.

"And we did."

"We win the war, but Lagertha slipped away like the vermin she is, and you-" Ivar cut himself off, dropping his head while shaking it as his grip on my wrist tightened. Softly sighing through my nose, I cupped his cheek in my free hand.

"I'm fine. I took care of it, there's no need to worry."

"But-"

"I am strong, Ivar." Those blue eyes looked up at me and I pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Now, get some sleep. You're awfully drunk and you stink."

" _You_ stink."

"Do not."

"Like a mangy wolf."

"That's just your own breath."

"Is not." He gently pushed me before face-planting into the bed. "Go away, you smelly bully. I don't have to listen to your teasing, I am King."

"King of pain in the asses-" I popped off, but Ivar was already snoring and it was hard to tell if he was doing it on purpose or if his drunk ass had finally passed out. Sighing, I chuckled before leaving the room.

~

"Garmr! Garmr, you fiend, get back here!" I shouted while chasing the wolf that looked absolutely delighted as if me chasing him were a game. "Drop it!" But the wolf just kept running, dashing around people as he left a trail of feathers. "Ivar can't save you, ya rotten, greedy little fucker!" Garmr had dashed into the hall and I followed after him.

Panting, I put my hands onto my knees when I saw the wolf had stopped.

"You....damn animal." I paused when I heard a small thud and looked to see Garmr had dropped the stolen chicken and had a tense stance, slowly easing into an attack position. Raising my gaze higher, I saw what- or who- the large animal was looking at. Sitting in a chair next to King Harald was an older man with long brown hair and a beard, dressed in fine clothes and gold- clearly a man of high status. I made eye contact with Harald and he made a face as Garmr raised his hackles.

"I-Ivar...." The man having a stare-down with the wolf didn't blink and I knew he wasn't very wise- never look an unfamiliar wolf in the eyes, it's seen as a challenge. The blue eyed man on the throne whistled to the wolf, but Garmr only flicked his ear in acknowledgement.

"Stop looking him in the eye, old man." I spoke up, walking to stand right behind the wolf. "It's a sign of challenge, and he _will_ rip your throat out if you don't stop." The stranger's gaze snapped to me and his eyes went even wider.

"Say hello to our uncle, Hel. This is Rollo." Hvitserk smiled and now that the man wasn't staring at Garmr, the wolf picked the chicken back up and trotted over to Ivar.

"Nice to meet you." I nodded to the man before turning to Garmr. "Oh, not so fast, you thief." I grabbed the wolf now under Ivar's throne by the scruff and drug him out as his claws scrabbled on the floor. He finally seemed to realize this wasn't a game and that he was most definitely in trouble for stealing that farmer's chicken from the market. "Drop it."

"Hel...."

"Yes, that's my name. Drop it!"

"You really...."

"I told you, uncle Rollo." Hvitserk chuckled. "I wasn't lying about Hel."

"And, yes, she really is _Floki's_ daughter." Ivar added just after Garmr let go of the half-bald chicken with a broken neck. Glancing to their uncle, I saw that he was still staring at me with disbelief.

"Ah, yes. It may take some time getting used to Hel." King Harald laughed while gesturing with his cup. "She is a woman to be feared and keeps the boys in line."

"Have either of you offered your uncle a meal? He must be hungry by now." I questioned, dropping Garmr to pick up the chicken and I saw Rollo's mouth twist into a small smile.

~

"I confess, when Hvitserk came to me and told me of your civil war....I was jealous." Rollo leaned back in his chair after Hviserk filled his cup and Ivar scoffed. "I cannot fight anymore. I'm not allowed to." Rollo sighed as one of the people he came with handed him a small bottle and but a strange powder into it. "I am far too _'important'_." He said while making a face and shaking the bottle. The man rolled his eyes before downing the contents of the little container and handed it back over to the other person.

"I remember once....hearing a story of a Berserker who, against the odds, went on to live a long, angry, and frustrated old age. He told his servants to go and collect all of his iron utensils. You know, his pots and pans, his-his weapons. And carry them up to the top of a high cliff and throw them off of it so he could hear it for one last time. The noise of battle."

"Ah, you would have _loved_ it, Uncle." Hvitserk sighed. "The battles were fierce. Great warriors were slain on both sides." He leaned forward, resting his elbows onto his knees while I tore up bits of meat to give to Garmr. "Odin must have been happy to take so many back to sup with him in Valhalla."

"Not you, brother."

"No, not me. Ubbe spared my life."

"Well, he is your brother, after all." Rollo stated and there was a quiet pause as the two brothers briefly glanced to Harald. "What is it I should know?" Harald raised his head while taking in a deep breath before letting it go.

"I killed Halfdan." He stated. "I killed my brother."

"I tried to kill mine once. So, Ubbe lives?"

"Yes."

"And Bjorn?" Hvitserk answered with a scoff. "Of course, Bjorn Ironside lives! I taught him to fight! Who can kill him, huh?" Rollo laughed, patting Ivar's knee and grinning at Hvitserk.

"Hel would kill us if we tried to kill Ubbe or Bjorn."

"Of course I would, the sons of Ragnar aren't going to kill each other on my watch. Especially over _Lagertha_."

"Who is still alive." Ivar said while looking right into the fire we sat around. "The woman that haunts my days and nights. The woman that I have sworn on my sacred ring to kill."

"Where is she?" Rollo questioned.

"We don't know. All we know is that, after the defeat, Lagertha, Ubbe, Bjorn, Torvi, left Kattegat in a hurry. Disappeared." Hvitserk took a drink from his cup.

"We have scouts looking for them." Harald sighed. "We will find them before too long."

"Well....I wish you luck." Rollo said over his cup.

~

Slouching in my seat, I looked into the fire heating the room while Garmr was sleeping on the edge of the bed closest to the wall. It was quiet other than the crackling fire and the wolf's soft breathing, and I just watched the dancing flames. It was late, but I wasn't tired just yet- I couldn't sleep with my busy mind.

Being back in the house on the river's edge, I was wondering how my father was doing. I knew he was still alive after leaving us in England, people in Kattegat told me of how he returned here only to leave again with a handful of people shortly after.

I was glad to have been able to meet Floki, to get to know him even and hear stories about him, but I would be lying if I said I didn't miss the only living blood kin I had left. I saw the sons of Ragnar somewhat like family, but it just wasn't the same. I prayed that, wherever Floki may be, he was doing well and was at least happy.

Leaning forward, I tossed another log into the fire, hearing various snaps as some embers flew up. My mind trailed to my mother, Brenna, now. Her voice speaking to me softly whenever we were home. She'd tell me tales of the gods and battles she had both won and lost, teaching me things I would need to know for life. Outside of our home, her tone would grow stern, directing me in the proper ways of battle as we sparred.

She was the fiercest woman I had ever known, scars littering her skin as physical proof to the trials and obstacles she had overcome. I took after her in many ways, except she had hair as dark as a night's sky and eyes as green as fresh moss.

Sighing, I ran my fingers through my hair while standing from my seat to stretch my legs by walking around the room. I felt restless and I couldn't figure why.

~

"So you didn't find them?" Harald questioned as Ivar's chariot slowed to a halt.

"No. They were gone. Except this one." He waved his hand to the dirty woman tied up and sitting in the chariot. "They left her behind." Ivar pat her on the head and Harald gave Ivar a look.

"Why is she bound?"

"Because she is mad."

"Isn't she Ubbe's wife?" My brows furrowed as I leaned onto the side of the chariot. "Magar-"

"Hel!" The blond gasped, rearing back as far from me as she could get. "I see you!"

"Yeah....I'm standing right in front of you."

"Hvitserk. You know her, don't you?"

"Of course I remember." Hvitserk came up beside me as Ivar lifted himself from the chariot and grabbed his crutch.

"I see you for what you _really_ are!" She pointed at me, grinning while shaking and having wide-eyes with furrowed brows. "The dark. Death. Eyes of fire and a heart of decay." She shook her head. "Don't touch me!" Margarethe's expression twisted. "I don't want to die. I don't want to die."

"It's all right." Hvitserk climbed into the chariot. "It's all right. I won't hurt you." He began to untie the rope around the woman's hands.

"What are you doing, brother?"

"Stay away!" Margarethe snapped at me, seemingly ignoring Hvitserk entirely. "I see you! I do! You can't fool me!" She laughed as the older Ragnar son helped her to stand. "You and your brothers can't hide anymore, I've seen you. I know. I know!"

"Margarethe, Hel doesn't have any brothers." Hvitserk calmly said, picking the woman up to carry her away.

"She does. Trapped and bound. Coiling in the seas. The wolf and the serpent!"

"Ah, great. She thinks I'm actually Hel." I rose my eyebrows, watching Hvitserk carry the rambling blonde away from the road.

"I'm not surprised." Ivar popped off.

~

Pushing the net to the side, Garmr walked into the room without a care and I looked up to see Ivar sitting with a blonde woman in a red dress.

"Oh, who's your new friend, arse-face?" I smiled, walking over to the two while putting my hands onto my hips. Ivar paused, but the woman answered with a gentle smile.

"My name is Freydis."

"Like Freya."

"Glad to know I'm not the only one named after a goddess around here." I chuckled as the blonde nodded.

"I've never forgotten what you told me." Ivar stated and I quirked up a brow.

"It's true what I told you. You are a very special person, Ivar." Freydis replied and the man scoffed.

"It is still hard for me to believe that. All my life has been a struggle. A war against myself."

"But look what you have already accomplished." The blonde glanced around the room and I sat down next to them while reaching for the pitcher and an empty cup on the table. "The gods have marked you out. You are favored above all men." She leaned forward, resting her elbows onto her knees.

"Even so, I'm in daily danger of being killed."

"Killed? By who?"

"Must you really ask?" I spoke up, pouring myself a drink. "He is a complex man- intelligent, fierce, enigmatic- and he is now King. That alone is enough for some people."

"And for others?" Freydis turned to me.

"He's more capable than most men all the while being a cripple. It terrifies them."

"And you?"

"Me?" I scoffed, setting the pitcher back down. "I've never been scared of any man, and I don't think I ever will."

"Why would you? Your paleness blinds anyone that even _looks_ at you. What would you have to fear?" Ivar popped off while chuckling, but there was a glint in his eyes as if there was an inkling of doubt. Did he still worry that I was scared of him?

"Yeah, well, your stench chokes even a _Saxon_ to death."

"My stench? Which of us wakes in a horse stall after getting drunk?" I paused just as I had the cup to my lips, staring at Ivar before quickly glancing to the blonde and back while lowering the cup.

"Look, that's not my fault, okay? So shut up."

"Oh, are you embarrassed, Hel?"

"No."

"Let me tell you what else Hel does-" Ivar grinned while turning to Freydis.

"Aaaaaah! Say another word, I _dare_ you!" I had a warning tone and the blonde looked amused at watching the two of us. Ivar smirked, getting that look of challenge and defiance in his eyes. "Ivar." I tensed, ready to jump out of my seat and tackle the man if need be.

He knew too much. The embarrassing stories of my childhood and the ridiculous situations I had gotten myself into while growing up- he knew too many.

"Ivar! I swear to the gods-" He turned to Freydis and opened his mouth to speak.


	19. Queen of Kattegatt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *WARNING: Mature content ahead, proceed at own risk*

Margrethe had calmed down by now and was quietly talking with Hvitserk on the other side of the table. King Harald sat to my right as I sat on the edge of the bench, leaning over the table while biting into a chicken leg. It was loud in the hall like usual while instruments played, and I grabbed a pitcher of mead to refill my cup.

Taking a drink, I sighed and the carved horn thunked against the wooden table.

"You gonna eat that?" I questioned, reaching over to Hvitserk's plate. He smacked my hand away like a mother would a child before giving me a look.

"Eat your own food, Hel."

"I am. And yours, if you aren't careful." I laughed before turning to the throne when Ivar stood and raised his voice.

"My people! My dear people!" The hall went quiet as the music died, and the blue eyed man had a hand on his chest as he was smiling. _'What in Odin's name is he about to announce?'_ I thought, bringing my cup to my lips to take another drink. "I have chosen this woman to be my new wife."

I spit out my drink to keep from choking, spraying Hvitserk and Margarethe with mead as my eyes went wide and I turned to Ivar to see him looking right at me.

"As you must know, her name is Hel and soon you will all know her as your new Queen of Kattegat!" The room erupted into cheers and banging, but I was silent as my face grew hot.

"I'm....surprised and yet I'm also not." Hvitserk said while wiping the mead off of his face.

"I actually didn't know about this until now." I stated, tearing my eyes away from Ivar as he saw my face reddening.

"This is all about the kingship. He takes a wife, produces an heir, and then, in his eyes, Kattegat is his forever." Harald spoke lowly before taking a drink.

"A good plan. Except for one thing."

"What thing?" Harald questioned and Hvitserk waved his hand while lowering his head. Margrethe leaned over to answer instead.

"He _can't_ produce children." She grinned while raising her eyebrows. "He is.... _boneless_." Harald looked at the two of them from across the table and Margrethe began to laugh as Hvitserk rose his eyebrows. Clearing my throat, I rose my cup to sort of hide my face behind it.

"Actually....not so much."

"What?" I could feel their eyes on my now and I took a large drink of mead before speaking again.

"Ivar isn't as incapable as you made everyone think, Margrethe."

"No, I _know_ he can't. I've seen for myself-"

"Hel, have you...." Hvitserk trailed off, quirking up a brow at me. I didn't answer and he began to laugh before hitting my shoulder. "What did you do? He tried with Margrethe and nothing happened. Maybe you really are blessed by the gods." I pushed Hvitserk back as he was still laughing, but Margrethe looked bewildered.

"I didn't do anything- well, I obviously did _something_ , but it's not what you think." I scoffed. "We were just....doing stuff and then suddenly...." I trailed off before gesturing with my hand.

"That's impossible." Margrethe placed her hand onto the table.

"That's what we thought at first too, so we didn't really try to go there. However, whatever went wrong between you and Ivar didn't this time and....yeah." I chuckled.

" _Nothing_ went wrong with Ivar. He _can't_ satisfy a woman." The blonde woman insisted and I shrugged.

"Trust me, he can _definitely_ satisfy a woman. Many times. If you don't want to believe it, you don't have to. He's got nothing to prove to you." I popped off and Harald waved his hand to me.

"But you haven't gotten pregnant yet?"

"Not that I'm aware." I replied and Hvitserk leaned onto the table while smiling.

"Do you think you could be with child now?"

"Why do I get the feeling you find more amusement in this than you should?"

"Because it's you. And Ivar." He glanced to his younger brother before looking back at me. "There's no telling what would come from you and him."

"Definitely not a baby any time soon." I scoffed, tearing a bite from my chicken leg. "I don't think I could stay still for nine months."

"You're right in that." Hvitserk scoffed while shaking his head.

"How do you know you are not just barren?" Margrethe questioned.

"Only time could tell with that." King Harald said softly, picking up his cup.

"Time, or a Seer." I pointed. "But that's not really high on my list of priorities."

"I assume getting married is at the top of that list." I threw a chicken bone at Hvitserk and he failed in blocking it while laughing.

As the night drug on, more and more vikings were stumbling or being drug out of the hall. Hvitserk yet again had passed out on the table and Harald stabbed the dinner knife into the wood while standing, the vibration and noise not stirring the passed out Ragnar son in the slightest.

"May the gods smile on your happiness." Harald smiled to Ivar and I before leaving and I stood up as well.

"What is with your brother and sleeping on tables?" I questioned and the younger brother shrugged before raising his voice.

"I think it's your bedtime, Hvitserk." He suddenly jolted awake, spilling a pitcher of mead before catching it and looking around with a briefly lost expression. Hvitserk seem to regain his bearings as he swayed on his feet.

"You know what?" He slurred. "You insult the gods."

"What?" Ivar scoffed. "The gods love me! You know that." Hvitserk just stumbled out after throwing some leftover food on the table onto the floor. Turning to Ivar now that almost everyone else was gone, I rose a brow while placing my hands onto my hips.

"So nice of you to just drop this proposal onto me." I said sarcastically and Ivar got up from his throne. "Did you ever plan on telling me beforehand?"

"I told you now."

"What if I had said no?"

"You haven't."

"I haven't said yes, either." I replied as the blue eyed man now stood right in front of me.

"Then what do you say? Do you not want to be my wife?"

"Mmm. Well, my wolf likes you." I cracked a smile. "I like you."

"But do you love me?" His expression was serious and I reached up to touch his cheek.

"I do."

"Then will you be my wife?"

"Hmm...."

"Hel."

"Let me think-"

"Hel!"

"Fine. Only because no one else will." I popped off, but lightly pushed his shoulder from the face he made. "I'm kidding, you idiot. You're mine, Ivar. I _won't_ share you. Marry me and you will have no chance of escape." I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, pulling him down to my level as he grinned.

"I don't think I would mind that."

"Are you sure? That means you can't fuck anyone else."

"That means you can't, either."

"True. But are you prepared to be stuck with me?"

"I could ask you the same thing, Hel." I smirked as my lips hovered closely over Ivar's without touching before I leaned back and began to drag him through the hall by his collar.

"Why don't you show me that new big bed of yours, my King?" Ivar's gaze was glued onto me as he grinned until he stumbled since he wasn't paying attention to where he was stepping.

Not even a minute later and we were naked under the blankets, kissing and grinding against each other. Ivar's body was firm and strong beneath my hands as my fingers trailed over his tattoos that now spread across his arms and chest.

Ivar tangled his fingers into my hair, pulling my head back to press his lips to my throat while his other hand was already working between my thighs. I moaned, my nails digging into his shoulder as he pressed his thumb harder into my clit. My heart was hammering in my chest as my face was flushed and I moaned again when Ivar nipped the side of my neck.

"I know what you want, Hel." Ivar's voice was husky as his breath fanned across my skin. "Beg for it."

"Fuck you." I panted in reply.

"Beg." He thrusted his fingers harder, making my hips buck as I moaned. "Do it, or I'll simply stop." Ivar pulled his hand back and I growled before swinging my leg over him, pushing him down into the bed.

"You may be King, Ivar. But I will not mewl and grovel to you." Grabbing his wrists, I pinned them onto the pillow on either side of his head. "Do you understand?"

"Yes....my Queen." He grinned, lifting one of his hands from the pillow to stick his fingers into his mouth, licking and sucking them clean while looking right at me. My thighs twitched and I brought my face closer to Ivar's.

"Why do you tease me so?"

"To watch you fall apart."

"You like seeing the power you have over me?"

"Maybe." His cocky smile faltered as I grabbed his throbbing dick and pressed the tip to my hot entrance.

"Then let's see who crumbles first." Biting Ivar's bottom lip, he groaned as I lowered my hips, bringing our bodies flush together as I felt the heat of his cock inside of me. Placing my hands gently onto his cheeks, I kissed him while rocking my hips. His rough hands traveled over my back while dragging his nails across my skin, making goosebumps rise as I moaned into his mouth.

Leaning back, I put my hands onto his chest, looking down at Ivar while riding him. His lips looked swollen from the kiss as his eyes were glazed with lust and his pupils blown. Gods, he looked so perfect this way, cheeks flushed and messy hair, bites and hickies scattered over his inked skin.

Ivar licked his lips before grinning, grabbing my arms and flipping me onto my back as he pinned my hands down. He grunted, thrusting his cock at a rough pace while biting at my neck and shoulder, leaving marks and I moaned. My hips bucked as my back arched, my legs locking over Ivar's waist.

"Ivar~!" I panted, my hands balling into fists as one of his hands traveled up my arm, his palm and rough fingers closing onto one of my breasts. Ivar's hot tongue ran over my throat before he was kissing at my jaw, and I soon found his tongue in my mouth as he kissed me.

My now free hand grabbed a fistful of his hair, pulling it as he moaned. Saliva bridged between our mouths when he pulled back, his thumb running over my bottom lip as he looked down at me.

"Listen to you, Hel." He grunted, sweat forming on his brow as he panted. "Look at you." Ivar's voice was husky as my lips wrapped around his thumb while my eyes locked with his. "My love. My Queen. My- Ngh- Goddess!"

"Such praise from you, Ivar." I smirked before moaning again.

"Praise?" He lowered his head to where his mouth was close to my ear, his heavy breathing sounding louder as his hot breath hit my skin. "You look so beautiful, Hel. Taking my cock, moaning my name- so perfect." Ivar whispered and I found pleasure in the way it made me shiver. "You like this, don't you? Being beneath me, being _mine_. I know you do, I can feel how wet you are. You know you feel just as good as you taste?"

"Fuck~!" I panted, my back arching off of the bed.

"That's right, Hel. Only I can make you feel this way. Tell me, who do you belong to?"

"You."

"Say my name."

"Ivar~!"

"Again."

" _Ivar~!_ "

"I'm going to fuck you so hard you won't be able to walk after." He groaned. "You'll be dripping with my cum- so breathless and full. Fuck, I love the way you take my cock. How you moan my name. How you mark me as yours." Ivar growled, nipping at my ear as my toes curled. He pinched my nipple before his hand wandered down and my body spasmed as he pressed his thumb to my clit. "My goddess. My Hel. _Mine._ " I didn't know where this sudden attitude change had come from, but, shit, was it doing something to me.

That low voice of his, the possessive growl with each declaration of 'mine', the prospects of being weak-kneed and satisfied....it was all so _good_.

"So I taste good, huh?"

"Like the finest mead."

"You like the way I feel?"

"Yes."

"Then make me cum, Ivar. Make me scream in pleasure." He added pressure to my clit, thrusting his hips harder and faster then before as his other hand grabbed the pillow to keep himself steady. With both of my hands now free, I tugged on Ivar's hair and left angry red marks on his back from my nails, egging him on. I wasn't going to fake it- and I didn't have to. Ivar was a quick learner and was very attentive, knowing how to touch me just right.

~

I was jolted awake from sudden movement right next to me and I shot up while pulling the knife from under my pillow. Looking around the room, I saw nothing, but Ivar was sitting up and panting, his eyes wide as he looked....scared.

"Ivar?" I questioned, lowering the knife as he turned to look at me. "Are you okay?"

"....Yeah." He swallowed. "It was just a....a dream. Just go back to sleep, Hel." Putting away the knife, I then grabbed Ivar's arm and pulled him back down onto the bed.

"Must have been some dream to frighten you, Ivar." I mumbled, wrapping my arms around the blue eyed man and running my fingers through his hair. He accepted my touch and slowly relaxed with his head resting on my chest.

"I wasn't frightened."

"Mm, if you say so." I chuckled before clicking my tongue. Garmr hopped up onto the bed and came up on the other side of Ivar, laying down right beside him. Between the comfort of the wolf and myself, Ivar soon fell back to sleep, his breathing softening as his heartbeat slowed.

Sighing, I closed my eyes to return to sleep as well since it was still dark out.


	20. Divide

"King Harald! I will think of you in York. I left some good men in charge there." Ivar said while raising his horn of mead.

"I will be glad to meet them. But York will only be a staging post for us."

"Good. I still consider it a part of my new kingdom."

"I think it is a good thing that I'm leaving."

"Yes, I agree. I think it is a good thing."

"But don't worry. With my ships filled with treasure and slaves, I will come back. Skol."

"Skol." Ivar's attention turned to me as he smiled, but I was too busy watching Hvitserk. The poor man, he was drinking more than usual and almost always shaking now with rage and grief in his eyes. "What's the matter with you, huh, little brother?" Ivar addressed Hvitserk and that sharp gaze of Hvitserk's snapped to Ivar.

"I am _not_ your little brother! And you know _exactly_ what's wrong with me. Margarethe is dead!"

"I know."

"Of course you know! You ordered the killing!" He slammed his hand onto the table and the entire hall went dead silent.

"Why would I do that?"

"You have many reasons to, Ivar." Hvitserk spat, getting up from his seat and walking over to his brother and leaned down to be eye-level with him. "She was right about you from the very beginning."

"Be very careful what you say about me, Hvitserk."

"Why? Will you kill me next?" He laughed and there were a few gasps when he suddenly went down from my fist colliding with his cheek. Without saying a word, I stood up from my chair and looked down at the shocked and angry Hvitserk as he held the side of his face. Crouching, I grabbed the front of his shirt and jerked him forward. Wrapping my arms around Hvitserk, I held him a tight hug while speaking low to where only he could hear me.

"I understand you are in pain, Hvitserk. Margarethe may have been a bitch, but she meant a lot to you and I get that. But that doesn't mean you lash out and talk that way. And Hvitserk....it wasn't Ivar that ordered the kill." Leaning back, I looked him in the eye and kept the same quiet voice so that no one else would hear me. "Be careful with those you keep close to you."

Standing up, I held out my hand to help the man to his feet. His face was a mix of emotions, but he accepted the offered hand and I returned to my seat.

"What did you tell him?" Ivar whispered, holding his horn in front of his mouth as he watched his brother.

"That you had nothing to do with Margarethe's death." Looking right at Ivar, I saw his gaze drift to me. "But if I find out you did....I'll make it to where you'll be begging to have Loki's punishments instead."

"I didn't." His expression was serious. "Though, I won't say I wasn't tempted." Grabbing my cup, I took a drink and held it for a second in front of my mouth in a similar manner to Ivar.

"Then the killing very well may be a ploy to put a divide between you and Hvitserk. If Hvitserk doesn't believe me, then it will definitely work."

"And how in the world am I supposed to convince him I _didn't_ have her killed?"

"Let me worry about that. You focus on keeping Kattegat in order. With you taking a bride, Harald may become a threat since he had believed the throne would be his in a matter of years. Now....not so likely."

"We should further discuss this later in private." Ivar glanced over the faces in the hall as the chatter and hollering had already returned.

"Agreed."

~

"Do you know who actually killed Margarethe?" I asked while undoing Ivar's braids one by one. Garmr was curled up by the fire pit while Ivar sat on a stool and I stood behind him.

"Not yet, whoever executed the kill didn't leave a clear indication to who they were."

"But they were undoubtedly ordered to do it, yes?"

"More than likely. _Someone_ is making moves against me."

"And Hvitserk was an easy target with his attachment to Margarethe."

"Exactly."

"Do you think King Harald is smart enough for something like that?"

"He very well may be. Relations between my brothers and I are already strained as it is- made worse when I...." Ivar trailed off while clenching his jaw and I knew he meant when he killed Sigurd.

"And it wouldn't shock anyone if you two turned on each other." I stated, running my fingers through his hair now that it was free from the braids. "I'll have a proper talk with Hvitserk. See if he's noticed anything strange, though I doubt he may have with his grief." Parting Ivar's hair, I began to rebraid it. "What about Freydis?"

"What about Freydis?"

"Does she have any motives? A reason to weaken the bond between Hvitserk and you?" Ivar scoffed.

"Of course not." Gently pulling his hair, I made him look up at me as I raised my eyebrows.

"And you are certain of this? You haven't pissed her off, have you?"

"No." He chuckled, and I tilted my head to the side.

"Not yet, anyhow. You piss off everyone eventually."

"Says you."

"Of course, says me. I know how much of an ass you are." Smirking, I kissed his forehead before going back to fixing his hair. "But we really must find who our real allies are."\

~

"You wanted to speak to me, brother?" Hvitserk dropped his sword onto the table while resting his knuckles onto the edge.

"Yes, my brother! Come, sit down." Ivar smacked the top of the table while grinning. "Drink! I have some wonderful news. Great news. Come on, sit down. Sit down." Hvitserk hesitated but took a seat after glancing to me.

"So, what's the great news? I would love some great news." Hvitserk said as Ivar set a cup down in front of his brother while chuckling.

"Where to start? You know that our whole family is descended from the All-Father?"

"Yes."

"That is you. That is me, too. You and me are descended from Odin. Everyone knows that. You also remember, when we were young, you and your brothers always made fun of me because I was different."

"I don't remember me making fun of you, Ivar."

"No, but you pitied me. And I was ashamed. I hated being a cripple. Always breaking my bones. The endless pain. I was so angry all the time, Hvitserk. And I asked myself, why did the gods _hate_ me so much? Why me? And then Freydis explained something to me." Ivar waved his hands and I glanced to the blonde woman sitting next to Hvitserk.

Where exactly was this going?

"She told me that being deformed was a _sure_ sign of the gods' favor. That it marked me out as a _very_ special person. It wasn't a badge of shame after all. Not a curse, but a blessing."

"It's true! I knew that." Freydis smiled.

"Why are you telling me this, Ivar?" Hvitserk asked.

"I am telling you this, because this very special person, has realized something _extraordinary_ and _astonishing_ about himself and it is so obvious."

"Realized what?" Hvitserk and I both asked at the same time with furrowed brows.

"Realized I am not just descended from the gods. No." He got this small smile while licking his lips and glanced to me. I didn't like the look in his eye and my gaze shot to Freydis. _'What the fuck had she been telling him?'_

"Ivar-"

"Hel is a goddess." Hvitserk started laughing and I sighed while taking a drink. "It's true. And she carries our divine child." I spit mead out all over the floor and Hvitserk turned to me with wide eyes.

"It's true, Hel." Freydis smiled, placing her hand over mine in a gentle manner. "Your divinity is clear to see, even if you deny it. And I can tell you're pregnant- the signs are there."

"I'm going to be a father!" Ivar grinned and I felt like I was suddenly in a trap. "And to celebrate, we will have a feast and we will invite everyone in Kattegat! And we will make a sacrifice, dedicated to her fellow gods. But it must be an important sacrifice. It must be someone the gods will have heard of. Someone that all the people will have heard of."

"Ivar-" My voice was low, but whatever Freydis had been telling him had him convinced of this falsehood.

"Hel, you may not be aware of who you are, but you _are_ one of the gods. You've done the impossible and blessed me with more than I could ever achieve on my own. And now, you are doing even more." I looked to Freydis, but she was only smiling and encouraging this....belief and Hvitserk looked just as shocked and taken back as me. He caught my eye and by looking at me he knew something heartbreaking was soon to happen.

I wasn't pregnant.

And Ivar looked so....happy. I knew he liked to call me his goddess, but that was never serious....not that I thought, anyway. I had believed Freydis could be a good friend for Ivar to have seeing as she wasn't afraid of him like most others, but if she was filling Ivar's head with these wild ideas....

~

Standing outside in the cold, I saw the clouds of my breath rise up towards the sky as I eyed the bones hanging from the roof. I never thought I'd be here, never thought I'd seek this person out....but I was left with little other choice.

"Are you just going to stand there or are you going to come in?" A raspy voice called from the darkness and I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.

I hated these places....I usually avoided them, but now....now I was here.

Pushing bones to the side, I entered the structure as the vertebrae rattled from the movement. It was dark and stank, but I pressed forward until I saw a small candle flickering on the edge of a short table.

"I was wondering when you'd come." The cloaked figure gave a wheezy chuckle before turning to show his eyeless face and black lips. "Though, I knew you would eventually come one day." The Seer shifted and reached for my hand, but I jerked it back out of his reach and he paused.

"I came for some answers."

"Then ask your questions."

"What influence does Freydis have over Ivar?"

"Jealous, are you?" The Seer chuckled, but it died as his smile fell. "Of course you aren't. Why would you be?" He waved his hand and sat comfortably as possible on the floor. "You needn't worry about Freydis."

"I do. She has Ivar convinced I'm carrying his child and that I'm one of the gods. How do I convince him of the truth?"

"....You are very concerned about Ivar. Do you only wish to ask about him? Do you not seek answers about yourself?"

"I know what you'll say. I'm marked by the gods. It's nothing I have yet to hear, so just tell me- Is Ivar safe with Freydis?" The Seer only began to laugh, forcing himself to stand as the airy and wheezy sound filled the room.

"'Marked'?" He scoffed. "You should heed Freydis, however. Ivar will be a father. Just not yet, not now. Ivar is at no threat from her." The Seer held his hands together while facing me as he shifted on his feet. "Are you sure you don't want to ask of the great destiny that awaits you?"

"No."

"Then why are you here?"

"I just needed to be certain-"

"No....there's more. Your concerns for Ivar extend beyond this woman. You fear for him." Clenching my jaw, I went to turn and leave the room, but stopped as he continued to speak. "You fear what you may do to him. That your paths may diverge somewhere along the line. And Hel....you are not _'marked'_ by the gods."

"What-"

"You've won every battle you've ever been in, your wolf has yet to perish despite the many wars it's endured. You've seen the All-Father himself, and you still believe you are only _'marked'_? Look at yourself, Hel. Your hair is like snow and your skin of sun-soaked bone. And your eyes....you have eyes of fire, the red and blue of a flame trapped inside them. You are more than marked, Hel."

"Stop it." My voice was harsh and he only grinned while gripping my wrist and pulling my hand towards his face.

"You may fear for Ivar's fate, but you have the power to change it if you will it." The Seer rasped before licking my palm.


	21. Crown of Raven Skulls

"Freydis." I stopped the woman by standing in front of her and she smiled at me.

"Hello, Hel." She gave a slight bow of her head.

"We need to talk."

"Of course, my Queen." Glancing around, I grabbed her arm and pulled her to a quiet corner out of the way. "My Queen, there's no need to be rough."

"Actually, there fucking is." I let her go and planted a hand onto the wall close to her head. "I want to know why the fuck you're telling Ivar all these lies about me."

"Lies? Hel," She laughed. "you _are_ pregnant. Your belly swells, you've been getting sick-"

"I've been getting chubby and drunk, you _fool_. I still _bleed_ , I am not swelling, I do not ache, _I am not pregnant!_ " I snarled, locking eyes with her and watching her expression fall.

"But the signs-"

"Are being read wrong. Tell me this, Freydis, is every person that stumbles out of the hall drunk and vomiting pregnant? You should have come to _me_ if this is what you believed. You've now convinced a man he is to be a father when he's not and his entire life he feared he'd be unable to. You've given him hope of something he's wanted and now I have to tell him the truth. Do you realize how much this is going to hurt him? Do you even care?"

"No, you _have_ to be-"

"Freydis, you're not fucking listening." I grabbed her jaw, forcing her to keep looking at me. "I am not pregnant, I am not carrying Ivar's child. And for the last fucking time, I'm _not_ a goddess." Stepping away from her, I was still glaring. "I want you to stay away from Ivar."

"My Queen, you can't choose who he associates with."

"If I find out you're filling his head with more lies and delusions....I'll fucking kill you and feed you to Garmr."

~

Rain and thunder roared outside as I held onto Ivar. It hurt so much telling him the truth and when it finally got through to him he wasn't to be a father he broke down into tears. He was crying, his hopes crushed and the thought he'd never be a father weighing on him even more than before.

"Ivar...." I spoke softly, rubbing his back as he sniffled. "I went and saw the Seer." He still didn't say anything and the storm outside raged on as the fire in the pit crackled. "He told me a few things, and one of the things he told me is that even if not now," Gently touching his cheek, I wiped away some of his tears with my thumb as he looked at me. "one day you _will_ be a father."

"No, I'm not." Ivar's lip quivered. "I can never have children."

"So you say the _Seer_ lies?" I questioned. "When has he ever lied?"

"But, Hel-"

"Ivar, we still have many, many years ahead of us. You still have time to become a father. Just because you aren't _now_ does not mean you never will be."

"....What else did the Seer tell you?"

"Ivar-"

"Hel, what else did he tell you?" He grabbed my hand on his cheek and I clenched my jaw before answering.

"He says I am more than just marked. Do not misinterpret, I am no goddess, but he says there is more to me."

"Did he say what?"

"I didn't give him the chance to. I didn't want to hear it." I shook my head. "I was more concerned about your safety."

"My safety?" His brows furrowed.

"If Freydis managed to convince you I was a goddess _and_ pregnant, I was worried what else she could convince you of."

"What did you do to her?"

"Nothing." I held his face in my hands. "I only gave her a warning, I did not harm her." Wiping his face, a loud crack of thunder came from outside. "I know you love the gods and you wish to believe in them, but believe in _them_ and not this woman that makes claims she has no actual proof to."

Ivar slowly closed his eyes and nodded, sighing through his nose before pulling back from me.

"I am tired, Hel." He mumbled, grabbing his crutch as he stood. "Let us sleep now."

"Good luck getting room with Garmr already there."

~

Morning light peeked through the cracks of the furs on the windows, casting the room with a soft glow as I looked down at Ivar. He was still asleep, laying on his stomach with his head shoved into the pillow and softly snoring. My head shot towards the door when I heard an urgent voice.

"My Lord Ivar!" Glancing to Ivar, I saw that he still slept and I got up out of bed. Leaving the room, I headed towards the front hall.

"What is it?" I questioned.

"Where is Lord Ivar?"

"Asleep, now why have you brought three bound men in here?"

"....We caught them. They have been trying for a while to raise a rebellion in the town. Against Ivar's rule." The man in front explained and I glanced to the three men on their knees. They were dirty and had bleeding cuts on their faces.

"A rebellion?" I stepped closer to the three men and looked down at them. "How foolish can you be? Trying to raise a rebellion in town? Surely _one_ of you at least must of known how that'd end." I glanced to each of them and they kept their gaze on the ground. "Do you have families?" Silence answered and I slightly raised my voice. "I asked, do you have families?"

One of them nodded and I lifted his chin. He was glaring, but his brows furrowed when he saw my expression. I wasn't angry, I was actually more disappointed.

"You put your entire family at risk for what? To make move against the man that lead us against the Saxons? That took back Ragnar's home for _his_ sons from a woman that murdered Aslaug for no reason other than her own ambition?" I paused and stepped back. "Men, can you tell me the best way to end a rebellion?"

"Kill them before it starts." The man that had brought them in said and I pointed at him.

"That's correct." I nodded. "You kill the rebellion before it starts. However," I glanced back to the trio. "I have you killed and that only incites your families to continue what you started. What was 3 can become 6, 12, on and on as word spreads of your death and that only will lead to more bloodshed. If you are dissatisfied with Ivar's rule, tell me ways to improve it. I'm giving you the chance right now to have your voices heard." Waving my hand, the man in the middle was now looking at me rather than the floor. "Ivar listens to me, I can discuss whatever matters you have with him. We are not on the throne to oppress our people, we are there to lead them."

"Fuck you." The man on the end spat on the ground and I sighed.

"Fuck me?" I kicked his chest, making him fall to the floor. "I offer mercy and peaceful talk, and that's still not good enough for you? What is the reason for your hate?"

"Queen Lagertha-"

"Isn't here nor a Queen any longer." I cut him off while looking down at him. "She's run off and has been gone for months. You two, will you choose peaceful talks or follow in this man's footsteps?" The other two on their knees glanced from the man on the ground to me, then turned away. "Do not be ashamed, men. You must be smart if you wish to succeed in your endeavors, have better lives for you and your families. You, on the other hand," I nudged the man's leg with my foot. "You are banished. If you wish to remain loyal to Lagertha, then go find her. If he's seen on our lands after today, he dies. He refused my help and this is my last bit of mercy for him."

The man on the floor was drug out as he was shouting angrily and cursing, but once he was gone I waved my hand to the other two.

"Release them."

"But-"

"You heard me. I cannot have a peaceful discussion with them is they are bound." Grabbing a pitcher of mead from a short table, I picked up two cups and set them onto a long table before pouring the mead into the glasses. "Come, sit. Tell me what has angered you to drive you to wanting to rebel." The two glanced to each other with uncertainty and I placed the pitcher next to the cups and sat down. "I'm being serious. Ivar may have a history of being a frightening man, but he does honestly care for his people. As do I. I would rather we quell this without bloodshed."

~

"Hel." I turned to see Hvitserk and I smiled.

"Haven't seen you in a while, stranger." He softly chuckled while shifting on his feet.

"I, uh, I didn't come for a mere visit."

"Is something wrong?"

"Where's Ivar?"

"Still in bed. He's....still upset."

"You told him?"

"I had to, Hvitserk. Do you need to talk to him?"

"No, no I actually did come to see you." He crossed his arms and I raised my eyebrows. "I heard about what happened. You....actually surprised people with how you handled it. I won't lie, you and Ivar still frighten a lot of people, but what you did was good."

"And you came just to tell me this?"

"I came to say you're good for Ivar. You're good for this kingdom. Be careful, though, not everyone will settle with just you listening to them. There will be times you _will_ have to fight."

"I know." I sighed. "But I'd like to avoid it as much as possible. I like to battle as much as the next viking, but I do not enjoy civil wars."

"-" Hvitserk opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by a scream. He and I both bolted, running for the source because it was Ivar and he sounded _terrified_.

"Ivar?!" I saw him sitting up in bed, panting and sweating while holding his head.

"Ivar, what happened?" Hvitserk was looking wildly around the room but no one was there except Garmr softly whimpering while trying to comfort Ivar.

"Nothing." He snapped and I grabbed his wrists to pull his hands away from his face.

"Ivar, what is it?" My tone was gentle but worried, and those blue eyes of his looked at me.

"It was a dream." He said softly. "I was covered in ash an-and blood and dressed in bones, I even had a crown of raven skulls." Ivar explained. "It was....it was so dark and then there was fire."

"It was just a dream, Ivar. You're okay."

"But I could _feel_ the fire's heat, Hel."

"It was still just a dream." I placed a soft kiss onto Ivar's forehead before turning to Hvitserk. "Well, he's awake now if you'd like to visit with him."


End file.
